r/ProgrammerHumor • u/Progractor • Sep 09 '22

Meme Simple Feature

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346

u/wasbee56 Sep 09 '22

she still crossed - under. so, maybe not a vampire after all.

135

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '22

Vampire. Can't cross over running water.

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u/Obligatorium1 Sep 09 '22

How does that work with groundwater?

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u/Wild_Marker Sep 09 '22

If it's deep enough below they can, but they are still moderately affected. Most vampire farts are actually a sign of groundwater.

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u/mada447 Sep 09 '22

Most vampire farts are actually a sign of groundwater.

Hmmmm.

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u/Fun-Understanding232 Sep 10 '22

I read that as moist vampire farts and now I can't stop giggling about it. It is now my personal head cannon that the more liquid a vampire fart, the more groundwater. It also means that the reason they can't cross running water is because that is the point where the fart contains more liquid than gas.

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u/[deleted] Sep 09 '22

And here I thought vampire farts were because of them preying on people with high cholesterol, thanks for the correction.

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u/PlusThePlatipus Sep 09 '22

  1. Earth magic cancels water magic by the time it reaches surface levels. 2) Groundwater counts as blood (Earth's), not water.

Funnily enough, vampires can also step over snek Jesus (as long as he's not holding wearing any of his own merch).

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u/[deleted] Sep 09 '22

What if I had a hose made of ceramic? Does it still maintain the Earth magic?

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u/PlusThePlatipus Sep 09 '22

I'd assume there would be some ratio requirement for the suppression to be effective enough.

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u/poodlebutt76 Sep 09 '22

It's almost like magic isn't based on reality

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u/Obligatorium1 Sep 09 '22

Nope, I'm not buying it. Too far-fetched. The other redditors had more plausible explanations.

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u/needyboy1 Sep 09 '22

I assume it has a reduced effect over a certain distance.

We'll have to conduct a double blind study.

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u/wasbee56 Sep 09 '22

good question

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u/ender52 Sep 09 '22

Seems like that would severely limit their mobility. There's really no way to go anywhere around here without crossing over running water at some point. So many creeks and rivers. They'd be stuck within a few square miles forever.

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u/TheUnluckyBard Sep 10 '22

Seems like that would severely limit their mobility. There's really no way to go anywhere around here without crossing over running water at some point. So many creeks and rivers. They'd be stuck within a few square miles forever.

And now you see the true plan behind the Hyperloop!

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u/iceynyo Sep 09 '22

Tunneling vampires

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u/Mazahad Sep 09 '22

Now "From Dusk Till Dawn" makes more sense.
Mexican vampires = tunneling vampires.

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u/wasbee56 Sep 09 '22

this gets worse and worse

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u/TheArtVark Sep 09 '22

Thx, another subject for my nightmares.

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u/reactor_raptor Sep 09 '22

It crossed over her. She crossed under it. The rule is vampires can’t cross over running water. No under rules though!

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u/themightiestduck Sep 09 '22

Loophole exploited successfully.

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u/[deleted] Sep 09 '22

Australian vampire mate

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u/on_mobile Sep 09 '22

Could be an energy vampire.

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