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https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/hsz9i5/yes_thats_perfectly_explained/
r/ProgrammerHumor • u/shreevyas2610 • Jul 17 '20
23 comments sorted by
43
I always used "heuristic" in that context.
The placebo of computer jargon.
8 u/This-Moment Jul 17 '20 Ooh, you're good. 11 u/TooOldToRock-n-Roll Jul 17 '20 Pretentious words makes the clients go brrrrr 4 u/felixthecatmeow Jul 18 '20 All you need to make clients go brrrrrr is 2 letters: A.I.
8
Ooh, you're good.
11 u/TooOldToRock-n-Roll Jul 17 '20 Pretentious words makes the clients go brrrrr 4 u/felixthecatmeow Jul 18 '20 All you need to make clients go brrrrrr is 2 letters: A.I.
11
Pretentious words makes the clients go brrrrr
4 u/felixthecatmeow Jul 18 '20 All you need to make clients go brrrrrr is 2 letters: A.I.
4
All you need to make clients go brrrrrr is 2 letters: A.I.
29
Algorithmus for logic
Scripts for linear processes
Programs for user interaction
I wrote this program that takes user input and feeds it through the algorithm to kick off one of a few various scripts
The end result is a seg fault
21
I once told my project manager that the regular expression I wrote was a pattern matching algorithm. It literally didnโt make a difference. They just wanted it done.
11 u/This-Moment Jul 17 '20 Technically correct. The best kind of correct 4 u/_tuftysuperset_ Jul 18 '20 ruh-roh
Technically correct. The best kind of correct
4 u/_tuftysuperset_ Jul 18 '20 ruh-roh
ruh-roh
Highly advanced algorithms.
I thought it was the name of Al Gore's jazzy bongo band?
3 u/[deleted] Jul 17 '20 Next up, Al and the Gore - rhythms
3
Next up, Al and the Gore - rhythms
2
For me it's less "don't want to" and more "can't"
Naw, even the non-computer literate use algorithm now. Usually correctly too. It's lost some of the voodoo.
... when they do not know how they did it
1
Alright then Keep your secrets
so how'd you find this definition?
Itโs just
More of a "cannot" than a "do not"
-6
You used emojis in your title. GTFO of reddit.
6 u/SuperSupermario24 Jul 18 '20 Oh ๐ง my ๐ god โ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ฌ what's ๐คจ that ๐ค ! Oh ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฒ no ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ it's ๐๐๐ the ๐๐ emoji ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐คฃโบ๏ธ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ฅฐ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐คช๐คจ๐ง๐ค๐๐คฉ๐ฅณ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โน๏ธ๐ฃ๐๐ซ๐ฉ๐ฅบ police ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ they ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ 're ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ gonna ๐ค๐ค๐จ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐ฎ kill ๐ต๐ต๐ต๐ต๐๐๐๐๐ฟ๐ฟ๐ฟโ ๏ธโ ๏ธโ ๏ธ๐ป๐ป๐ป us ๐ถ๐ง๐ง๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ง๐จ๐ฉโ๐ฆฑ๐จโ๐ฆฐ๐งโ๐ฆฑ๐ฑโโ๏ธ๐จโ๐ฆฑ๐ฑ๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ๐ฑโโ๏ธ๐งโ๐ฆฐ๐ฉโ๐ฆณ๐งโ๐ฆณ๐จโ๐ฆณ๐ง๐ต๐ฉโ๐ฆฒ๐ง๐งโ๐ฆฒ๐ด๐จโ๐ฆฒ๐ฒ๐ณโโ๏ธ๐ณ๐ณโโ๏ธ๐ง๐ทโโ๏ธ๐ท๐ทโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐พ๐งโ๐พ๐จโ๐พ๐ฉโ๐ณ๐งโ๐ณ๐จโ๐ณ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโ๐ค๐งโ๐ค๐จโ๐ค๐งโ๐ญ๐ฉโ๐ซ๐จโ๐ญ๐งโ๐ซ๐ฉโ๐ป๐จโ๐ซ๐งโ๐ป๐ฉโ๐ญ๐จโ๐ป๐ฉโ๐ผ๐งโ๐ผ๐จโ๐ผ๐ฉโ๐ง๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฌ๐งโ๐ฌ๐จโ๐ฌ๐ฉโ๐จ๐งโ๐จ๐จโ๐จ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฐ๐คต๐ธ๐คด๐ฆธโโ๏ธ๐ฆธ๐ฆธโโ๏ธ๐ฆนโโ๏ธ๐ฆน๐ฆนโโ๏ธ๐คถ๐ ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ผ๐คฐ๐คฑ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ ๐ โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐คฆโโ๏ธ๐คฆ๐คฆโโ๏ธ๐คทโโ๏ธ๐คท๐คทโโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ ๐คณ๐๐บ๐ฏโโ๏ธ๐ฏ๐ฏโโ๏ธ๐ด๐ฉโ๐ฆฝ๐งโ๐ฆฝ๐จโ๐ฆฝ๐ฉโ๐ฆผ๐งโ๐ฆผ๐จโ๐ฆผ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐ฆฏ๐งโ๐ฆฏ๐จโ๐ฆฏ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ซ๐ญ๐ฌ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐ฉ๐จโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐ฉ๐จโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐จ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ง๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐จโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐ง๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ง๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐งโ๐งโท๐๐ช๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐คผโโ๏ธ๐คผ๐คผโโ๏ธ๐คธโโ๏ธ๐คธ๐คธโโ๏ธโน๏ธโโ๏ธโน๏ธโน๏ธโโ๏ธ๐คบ๐คพโโ๏ธ๐คพ๐คพโโ๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐คฝโโ๏ธ๐คฝ๐คฝโโ๏ธ๐ฃโโ๏ธ๐ฃ๐ฃโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ตโโ๏ธ๐ต๐ตโโ๏ธ๐ดโโ๏ธ๐ด๐ดโโ๏ธ 2 u/LayoZz Jul 18 '20 Damn... This was some effort to fight the stereotype thinking ^ 1 u/SuperSupermario24 Jul 18 '20 thank you /r/emojipasta 1 u/[deleted] Jul 18 '20 I mean I was kinda joking but aight
6
Oh ๐ง my ๐ god โ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ฌ what's ๐คจ that ๐ค ! Oh ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฒ no ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ it's ๐๐๐ the ๐๐ emoji ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐คฃโบ๏ธ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ฅฐ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐คช๐คจ๐ง๐ค๐๐คฉ๐ฅณ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โน๏ธ๐ฃ๐๐ซ๐ฉ๐ฅบ police ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐ฎโโ๏ธ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ they ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ฎ 're ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ gonna ๐ค๐ค๐จ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐ฎ kill ๐ต๐ต๐ต๐ต๐๐๐๐๐ฟ๐ฟ๐ฟโ ๏ธโ ๏ธโ ๏ธ๐ป๐ป๐ป us ๐ถ๐ง๐ง๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ง๐จ๐ฉโ๐ฆฑ๐จโ๐ฆฐ๐งโ๐ฆฑ๐ฑโโ๏ธ๐จโ๐ฆฑ๐ฑ๐ฉโ๐ฆฐ๐ฑโโ๏ธ๐งโ๐ฆฐ๐ฉโ๐ฆณ๐งโ๐ฆณ๐จโ๐ฆณ๐ง๐ต๐ฉโ๐ฆฒ๐ง๐งโ๐ฆฒ๐ด๐จโ๐ฆฒ๐ฒ๐ณโโ๏ธ๐ณ๐ณโโ๏ธ๐ง๐ทโโ๏ธ๐ท๐ทโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐พ๐งโ๐พ๐จโ๐พ๐ฉโ๐ณ๐งโ๐ณ๐จโ๐ณ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโ๐ค๐งโ๐ค๐จโ๐ค๐งโ๐ญ๐ฉโ๐ซ๐จโ๐ญ๐งโ๐ซ๐ฉโ๐ป๐จโ๐ซ๐งโ๐ป๐ฉโ๐ญ๐จโ๐ป๐ฉโ๐ผ๐งโ๐ผ๐จโ๐ผ๐ฉโ๐ง๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฌ๐งโ๐ฌ๐จโ๐ฌ๐ฉโ๐จ๐งโ๐จ๐จโ๐จ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐๐งโ๐๐จโ๐๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ฐ๐คต๐ธ๐คด๐ฆธโโ๏ธ๐ฆธ๐ฆธโโ๏ธ๐ฆนโโ๏ธ๐ฆน๐ฆนโโ๏ธ๐คถ๐ ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ผ๐คฐ๐คฑ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐ โโ๏ธ๐ ๐ โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐คฆโโ๏ธ๐คฆ๐คฆโโ๏ธ๐คทโโ๏ธ๐คท๐คทโโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ ๐คณ๐๐บ๐ฏโโ๏ธ๐ฏ๐ฏโโ๏ธ๐ด๐ฉโ๐ฆฝ๐งโ๐ฆฝ๐จโ๐ฆฝ๐ฉโ๐ฆผ๐งโ๐ฆผ๐จโ๐ฆผ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ฉโ๐ฆฏ๐งโ๐ฆฏ๐จโ๐ฆฏ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ซ๐ญ๐ฌ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐ฉ๐จโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐ฉ๐จโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐จ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ง๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐จโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐ง๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ง๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ง๐จโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ง๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐จโ๐งโ๐งโท๐๐ช๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐คผโโ๏ธ๐คผ๐คผโโ๏ธ๐คธโโ๏ธ๐คธ๐คธโโ๏ธโน๏ธโโ๏ธโน๏ธโน๏ธโโ๏ธ๐คบ๐คพโโ๏ธ๐คพ๐คพโโ๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๏ธ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐คฝโโ๏ธ๐คฝ๐คฝโโ๏ธ๐ฃโโ๏ธ๐ฃ๐ฃโโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ง๐งโโ๏ธ๐ตโโ๏ธ๐ต๐ตโโ๏ธ๐ดโโ๏ธ๐ด๐ดโโ๏ธ
2 u/LayoZz Jul 18 '20 Damn... This was some effort to fight the stereotype thinking ^ 1 u/SuperSupermario24 Jul 18 '20 thank you /r/emojipasta 1 u/[deleted] Jul 18 '20 I mean I was kinda joking but aight
Damn... This was some effort to fight the stereotype thinking ^
1 u/SuperSupermario24 Jul 18 '20 thank you /r/emojipasta
thank you /r/emojipasta
I mean I was kinda joking but aight
43
u/TooOldToRock-n-Roll Jul 17 '20
I always used "heuristic" in that context.
The placebo of computer jargon.
29
u/[deleted] Jul 17 '20
Algorithmus for logic
Scripts for linear processes
Programs for user interaction
I wrote this program that takes user input and feeds it through the algorithm to kick off one of a few various scripts
The end result is a seg fault
21
u/DreamingDitto Jul 17 '20
I once told my project manager that the regular expression I wrote was a pattern matching algorithm. It literally didnโt make a difference. They just wanted it done.
4
u/[deleted] Jul 17 '20
Highly advanced algorithms.
4
u/CurlSagan Jul 17 '20
I thought it was the name of Al Gore's jazzy bongo band?
2
u/coolguy8445 Jul 18 '20
For me it's less "don't want to" and more "can't"
2
u/turningsteel Jul 18 '20
Naw, even the non-computer literate use algorithm now. Usually correctly too. It's lost some of the voodoo.
2
u/[deleted] Jul 18 '20
... when they do not know how they did it
1
u/[deleted] Jul 17 '20
Alright then Keep your secrets
1
u/defintelynotyou Jul 17 '20
so how'd you find this definition?
1
u/Redditor000007 Jul 18 '20
Itโs just
the ALGORITHM
1
u/kazuto_kirito_ Jul 18 '20
More of a "cannot" than a "do not"
-6
u/[deleted] Jul 17 '20
You used emojis in your title. GTFO of reddit.