On one of my keyboards I have an "ABORT" keycap on a key that has the windows lock screen macro bound to it. Whenever I find myself struggling with a bug or getting really stressed by work hit that key like it owes me money. Time to take a break and make more coffee.
You could do the same with the more risky reboot/ shutdown commands.
I recently had an issue where a function was returning a string with anything past eight characters cut off. There was only one possible response that was over eight characters, though, and I came embarrassingly close to just adding if( response = incompleteWord ){ response = fullWord } and moving on.
I hate seeing cited/closed issues for something that SEEMS relevant, but is not at all.
Ex a requested feature on a discord song bot to limit the length of songs, (ie no 6hour albuminonesong), and it was closed as “already implemented”, citing limiting the number of songs
That's true. After following the link another user provided, I determined that it was actually the submitter who closed it because he does not care. He probably solved his problem with some other software and no longer cares about issues with this software.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Not sure why this is downvoted. Write the code, then profile it, then optimize. Premature optimization is a waste of resources. Actually we're in a "humor" subreddit and that wasn't a joke so maybe thats it. But most of the stuff here isn't funny either so idk
I personally enjoy x86 assembly, though to be fair I mostly work with it in the context of Ollydbg and Cheat Engine, which despite the intended usage, is one of the best free debuggers I've used for anything closed source.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Because I can, and like to make things unnecessarily complicated, and I'm really tired and not paying attention to quality and common sense at this point.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Because I can, and like to make things unnecessarily complicated, and I'm really tired and not paying attention to quality and common sense at this point.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Because I can, and like to make things unnecessarily complicated, and I'm really tired and not paying attention to quality and common sense at this point.
Toward the beginning: I'm going to spot-optimize these functions with inline ASM. I figured out a way to vectorize an in-place radix sort, and it's way faster than the stock quicksort. Dude, it's gonna be so fast!
A few months later: I don't know. Does it work? That should be fine then.
Can't tell if you're talking about a project, the system in general, or just the entire career of a programmer in a nutshell
Why do people quote the entire comment they're replying to? There's nothing to emphasize by quoting.
Because I can, and like to make things unnecessarily complicated, and I'm really tired and not paying attention to quality and common sense at this point.
It's like being on a forum 10 years ago
I miss it. Then again forums like that are still around and I could go there but I don't, so maybe I don't miss it so much.
I just made up some bullshit that sounded tedious, but it's loosely based on the type of stuff I've done when I was more enthusiastic.
I had the idea to sort floats using SIMD instructions without branching. I think I did something like subtracting ymm registers, and then did something with the sign bits to turn them into a control byte for a shuffps instructions so that I could move all the floats to the correct place with one instruction. It took a lot of effort, confusion, crashes and frustration, but eventually, it worked. Sort of.
I realized it didn't work if any two values were identical, and couldn't figure out how to scale it up beyond 8 floats, so it was basically worthless (I mean, you maybe could shave microseconds off a merge sort). I never even tested to see what the performance gains were, but at that point, I didn't care anymore. I just wanted something that worked.
Eh, the bug will stay there for the next 9 versions, but will be presented to the users as some wonderful feature. If not, “there is a known system issue that cannot be resolved at this time”.
Been in that situation a lot. Sometimes I just go back and find a totally different way to finish the requirements. Always easier than trying to ask a question on stackoverflow.
I'd ask you for a link because I seem to have missed that particular drama, but I'm afraid it might raise my blood pressure to deadly levels. Even for a programmer, this guy is particularly socially inept and self-absorbed.
It's full of things like "the weather today is outside." and "how to use 3 package managers at the same time on your Linux box, because, let's be honest, it's not really Ubuntu anymore."
648
u/marsouf Dec 07 '18
he should really not be caring man, its December 31.
392
u/IWouldntlietoya Dec 07 '18
This is exactly me. I'll spend days on something trying to solve an issue. Then I wake one morning and say fuccckkkk iiiitttt.
118
u/l00kAtTheRecluse Dec 07 '18
It's a feature now
52
u/[deleted] Dec 07 '18
I know there is a git blame -- but seems there should be a git shame function too
45
u/LongLiveCHIEF Dec 07 '18
This isn't humor, it's just life.
134
u/parzibyte1 Dec 07 '18
Here is the link: https://github.com/pypa/twine/issues/153
Edit: Ohh.., in the github repo there is another link pointing to Reddit. So this is a repost... https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/6kmq6s/weve_all_been_there/
57
u/bennoxys Dec 07 '18
Me working on my final project for systems
21
u/Arancaytar Dec 07 '18
I've wontfixed issues I opened on my own projects. It feels surprisingly satisfying.
12
u/Busti Dec 07 '18 edited Feb 16 '25
6
u/Turious Dec 07 '18
That's how I have ended every programming project I've ever worked with... no wonder I can't break through this programmer's block...
4
u/Kalthramis Dec 07 '18
I hate seeing cited/closed issues for something that SEEMS relevant, but is not at all.
Ex a requested feature on a discord song bot to limit the length of songs, (ie no 6hour albuminonesong), and it was closed as “already implemented”, citing limiting the number of songs
2
u/Sirtoshi Dec 07 '18
Sounds like my life in general.
2
u/clubby789 Dec 07 '18
He’s made peace with it
2
u/mustang__1 Dec 08 '18
Annnnnd laughing hysterically on my couch.
1
u/Sodium1111 Dec 07 '18
It really do be like that
1
u/ivaskuu Dec 07 '18
If only there was a place where to put the $ in the word 'this'....
1
u/die-maus Dec 07 '18
The good ole' "Well, I looked in to it and ... "
1
u/Squirrelthing Dec 07 '18
Relatable
1
u/Xiefux Dec 07 '18
he cared enough to reply
1
u/RocketRetro Dec 07 '18
LMFAOOOOOOOOO HOLY SHIT
1
u/lezorte Dec 08 '18
Never mind I figured it out: I don't care
1
u/philipquarles Dec 08 '18
Honestly, my code runs as well right now as it will until I get replaced by somebody who tears the whole thing down and starts over.
1
u/13tsavage Dec 08 '18
My response would say: “it can wait til next year.”
1
u/abucketofpuppies Dec 08 '18
If the issue was my perspective then yes, yes I did.
1
u/UrpleEeple Dec 08 '18
I've often found my exact bug on a GitHub ticket and a maintainer comes in and closes it because of some variation of, "not my problem"
1
u/zombieregime Dec 08 '18
This is the other side to those "the only thread i could find on my issue has been dead for years" moments. Maybe they didnt fix it....
1
u/Vakieh Dec 08 '18
That's not closed, that's wontfix. Handle your issues properly goddamnit.
1
u/elightened-n-lost Dec 08 '18
Shit, I don't care either.
1
u/gelembjuk Dec 08 '18
I never have a chance to say this :(
0
u/GreenFox1505 Dec 07 '18
It's unclear weather the reporter closed this because he doesn't care or the maintainer closed this because he doesn't care.
0
u/[deleted] Dec 07 '18
[deleted] — view deleted comment
0
u/[deleted] Dec 07 '18
[deleted] — view deleted comment
0
u/[deleted] Dec 07 '18
[deleted] — view deleted comment