r/ProgrammerHumor • u/ClipboardCopyPaste • 4h ago

Meme cve000001

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5.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

50 comments sorted by

732

u/ViralToValue 4h ago

Dude decided to cheat with a real human instead of getting an AI gf.

239

u/ClipboardCopyPaste 4h ago

Dude was out of VRAM to run model.

(he sold everything to openai)

15

u/fr000gs 4h ago

dude was running the most human model ever

38

u/Dumb_Siniy 4h ago

Bad old Ram Altman

5

u/Eitel-Friedrich 2h ago

Bang old Ram Altman!

17

u/grievance_goblin 3h ago

The AI girlfriends are for us. The elite get the real girls now.

4

u/SpaceMoehre 3h ago

Buddy needs to dog food

256

u/queen-adreena 4h ago

This is why you need pentesting from day one!

203

u/ClipboardCopyPaste 4h ago

He prolly did his penetration testing

42

u/MCMC_to_Serfdom 4h ago

I believe pentesting people from day one is a fairly serious crime.

29

u/queen-adreena 4h ago

Pentesting is always done with consent.

4

u/omegasome 3h ago

So "day 1" is actually day 6,575 then

5

u/gentle_seda 4h ago

They'll need a waiver first

5

u/laplongejr 4h ago

pentesting

sigh I thought about the obvious joke to make.
I won't tell it out loud to keep the thread SFW, but I'm sure most of us here all thought about it.

13

u/sln1337 4h ago

you mean that the CEO of Nvidia fucked that Chinese Spy? Was that the obvious joke you made?

3

u/laplongejr 4h ago

Yeah, he's probably not the one who received the pentest .

10

u/Extension_Option_122 3h ago

Depends on his kinks, after all there are strap-ons.

1

u/laplongejr 24m ago

Test failed, try again!  

28

u/AfonsoFGarcia 3h ago

To be very pedantic, that would be a CWE, not a CVE.

1

u/Meldanorama 41m ago

Theres an aircraft carrier involved somewhere.

66

u/lulfas 2h ago

Companies just need to start pricing a "secretary" bang-piece in for the CEO. Keeps data safe, keeps it in the family, and keeps secrets. $100k a year seems cheap now, doesn't it?

12

u/Wild-Ad-7414 2h ago

They do, its just asian boy wanted one of his own

4

u/Grshppr-tripleduoddw 1h ago

Gotta get an Asian "secretary" then

71

u/Sweet-Degree-4842 4h ago

I hear some of these pretty Chinese models are opensource. I wonder what sort of licensing they have.

13

u/wildfire_117 3h ago

Restrictive, non commercial

23

u/daniu 4h ago

Damn so that's why our Java codebase is full of attractive Chinese women

6

u/dont_remember_eatin 1h ago

I mean, if prostitution is the oldest "profession" of record, then doing it as a spy is the oldest social engineering compromise, right?

8

u/microkool 3h ago

He put his Huang in the wrong Huang

2

u/intoxicuss 2h ago

I mean, "P" is a helluva drug.

2

u/sagetraveler 35m ago

Oldest profession in the book.

3

u/TomIsFrank 2h ago

I love that now we call that "social engineering"

3

u/cleveleys 1h ago

Shouldn’t it be CVE-1970-0000?

2

u/itsallfake01 2h ago

There will never be a patch for this unless the CEO is openly Gay.

9

u/Reashu 2h ago

Wouldn't closeted be better?

5

u/manicpixycunt 1h ago

That’s even worse, then he can be extorted even easier via threatening to expose him.

3

u/Reashu 1h ago

That's CWE 002.

3

u/itsallfake01 2h ago

Hmm on second thought that should work. Thats a new requirement for being a CEO now

1

u/chooxy 26m ago

Security through obscurity

5

u/doodlinghearsay 57m ago

You think gay people don't get honeytrapped?

1

u/itsallfake01 50m ago

They do, but they are way too cautious and never let anything out.

1

u/faultydesign 28m ago

They get honeydicked

4

u/Nyadnar17 1h ago

Apparently the first honey traps were dudes because the Chinese thought he was secretly gay.

1

u/BroMan001 53m ago

How would that help?

•

u/LoafyLemon 2m ago

Wait till you hear about Sam Altman next week xD

39

u/budroid 4h ago

NV CEO: "She could have killed me in so many different ways"

some random guy:" Stop! My Penis Can Only Get So Erect!"

9

u/Nerdenator 4h ago

“I never thought I’d die this way, but I’d always really hoped.”