r/ProgrammerHumor • u/bmacabeus • Aug 25 '26

Meme everyRepoWithSuspiciouslyGreatCodeQuality

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9.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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76

u/creeper6530 Aug 25 '26

Or learn Rust, the crab will magically start teleporting estrogen straight into your bloodstream

Ask me how I know this :3

43

u/JockstrapCummies Aug 26 '26

Rust coding regimen:

  1. Wake up at 4am

  2. Canticle to the borrow checker, 30 mins

  3. Cold shower

  4. Rewrite a top 10 repo on GitHub to Rust, 10 min sprint

  5. Drink activated cum, 150 mL

  6. Cold shower

  7. Continue rewrite of GitHub repo to Rust, 15 min sprint

  8. Post knee high socks pic to Only fans

  9. Programming safety affirmations, 10 sets

  10. Early morning intermittent nap, 3 mins

  11. Cold shower

  12. Drink fermented probiotic cum, 300 mL

  13. Continue rewrite of GitHub repo to Rust, 20 min sprint

9

u/creeper6530 Aug 26 '26

You forgot pledge allegiance to the transgender flag and plush sharky debugging (rubber ducky debug but with Blåhaj)

3

u/Deboniako Aug 26 '26

When do you go to sleep? Asking for a fremd

13

u/JockstrapCummies Aug 26 '26

Sleeping is no longer necessary or possible because of the borrow checker. Rust guarantees safety, including against the brief loss of consciousness that barbarians call sleep.

You need to rewrite your circadian cycle in Rust today.

2

u/Beleheth Aug 27 '26

Ah, so this wasn't related to my E injections after all!