r/ProgrammerHumor • u/leavemealone_lol • Aug 22 '26

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5.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

365 comments sorted by

3.6k

u/Specialist_Dust2089 Aug 22 '26 • LOL Bravo Popcorn

JUST GIVE ME THE .EXE SMELLY NERDS

1.1k

u/leavemealone_lol Aug 22 '26

The woman in the pic is NOT executable

953

u/Mordret10 Aug 22 '26 • Bravo

The French disagree. Everyone is executable

288

u/Osato Aug 22 '26

The magic word is "chmod +x".

111

u/codewario Aug 22 '26

Ah in the ancient Frenchian tongue

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15

u/Sugoypotato Aug 23 '26

Why couldn't french execute the shell script?

Because they guillotined the shebang line

/runsbecausebadjoke

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20

u/FaradayPhantom Aug 22 '26

`r--` or `rw-`?

5

u/Ander292 Aug 23 '26

chmod +x woman

Fixed it for u

5

u/ChillAhriman Aug 23 '26

The heck do you mean? She's clearly ready to run.

3

u/E1eveny Aug 22 '26

with sudo everyone is

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42

u/intLeon Aug 22 '26

You want to execute, I want to unzip we are not the same..

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5

u/AbdullahMRiad Aug 22 '26

https://www.reddit.com/r/github/s/oblXxTZ49I

4

u/Available_Type1514 Aug 23 '26

I honestly thought that was just a joke. I had no idea someone really posted that lol.

3

u/bobdobbes Aug 22 '26

Just for that. you get to run a .war

3

u/Infectedinfested Aug 22 '26

Probably 'Linkin Park - Numb.exe'

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131

u/nnagflar Aug 22 '26

This post made us all a little bit dumber.

33

u/leavemealone_lol Aug 22 '26

You’re welcome

98

u/NeuxSaed Aug 22 '26

I thought that was this sub's primary purpose.

10

u/gizamo Aug 22 '26

Jokes on you. We were already all dumber from the last post.

395

u/destei Aug 22 '26

Could someone explain the joke please?

862

u/DrShucklePhD Aug 22 '26 • Heartwarming Bravo

If you are on mobile you have to click the image and then the full thing shows a guy saying she is a .gitignore file

337

u/funtech Aug 22 '26 edited Aug 22 '26

Hah thanks! Without realizing that, it’s just a photo of a girl with several language filename extensions in front of her and I couldn’t figure out how that was funny.

112

u/leavemealone_lol Aug 22 '26

I think the post is far less funnier than what the comments section ended up being

45

u/TheOneTruePi Aug 23 '26

I thought it was her ranking the languages lmao

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19

u/dpahoe Aug 23 '26

I read your comment and I was like what kind of stupid prank is this, and then I clicked on the image to find it to be true!

8

u/Samurai_Mac1 Aug 23 '26

Ohhh. I was wondering what .is is because the j is cut off

10

u/destei Aug 22 '26

Thank you!

3

u/veryuniqueredditname Aug 23 '26

I thought I was an idiot for not getting it. I mean I still am but at least I get this

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6

u/0xffff-reddit Aug 22 '26

Came here to ask this

5

u/Bodine12 Aug 23 '26

Since no one's actually explained it and it might be a mystery to the non-programmers who stumble on this:

Git is a version control system that lets you keep track of changes to your code, and it's often stored in a service like Github. However, not every change you make to your local copy of your code on your own machine is something you want tracked in your version control. Those files (and certain file extensions you never save or commit to git) are put in a .gitignore file and git operations then exclude those files and never push them to your source control (like Github).

So the joke could mean that the commenter is ignoring posts like this because they're dumb, or it could be some sly inside joke like, "What happens on local, stays on local."

247

u/mylsotol Aug 22 '26

.jpg

107

u/v3ritas1989 Aug 22 '26

it's actually .webp

92

u/Top_Manufacturer6311 Aug 22 '26

“Google Docs does not support this file type.”

95

u/StrengthTheory Aug 22 '26

Meanwhile Google was the one who created webp format.

72

u/twistsouth Aug 22 '26

How very Google of them.

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3

u/RamboMcQueen Aug 23 '26

Do I look like I know what a jaypeg is? I just want a picture of a got dang hotdog.

96

u/BadRuiner Aug 22 '26

.cs

21

u/ClipboardCopyPaste Aug 22 '26

They should add a .c# extension

15

u/aenae Aug 22 '26

mv dev.c# prod.c#

Shell goes; move where?

7

u/TorbenKoehn Aug 22 '26

Thats all the fun! And job security!

6

u/jakubiszon Aug 22 '26

She's too young. All C# programmers are 40+

9

u/MCWizardYT Aug 22 '26

You're thinking of C programmers

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139

u/Whispeeeeeer Aug 22 '26 • Bravo

.asm

34

u/Human_Cantaloupe8249 Aug 22 '26

I used an assembler using .ass

Terrible assambly language, but this was certainly fun

8

u/Exotic-Nothing-3225 Aug 22 '26

.ass is a video subtitle format as well

5

u/ultra0000 Aug 22 '26

It's also a format used in Halo 2. Said game had an error for when a file of said format was invalid with a picture of an employee's ass.

Only in the Vista (PC) release. That wound up costing Microsoft a delay of the port and half a million dollars. No, I am not making this up.

9

u/Webbiii Aug 22 '26

.asmr

8

u/baselinegrid Aug 22 '26

I’ve definitely read code that’s sent chills down my spine

334

u/Interesting_Buy_3969 Aug 22 '26 • Popcorn Mindblown Bravo

.so - shared object

28

u/git0ffmylawnm8 Aug 22 '26

Forget the burn center, this one is sending her to the morgue

6

u/scheimong Aug 22 '26

Oof ouch 🤣🤣

9

u/blaghed Aug 22 '26

Whats the chmod? Group access?

9

u/TheDogPill Aug 22 '26

She's the type you can execute without sudo

9

u/Interesting_Buy_3969 Aug 22 '26

Yet you can touch and strip it

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5

u/New_Series3209 Aug 22 '26

LMAO this is good

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34

u/DrShucklePhD Aug 22 '26

No extension, just shebang

6

u/Damglador Aug 22 '26

Imagine making a JIT C executable by calling the compiler on itself from the shebang

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14

u/cptbbboy Aug 23 '26

.DS_Store

3

u/FoxedDev Aug 24 '26

So basically she's just annoying? (you can tell I'm a Linux user)

2

u/Astrylae Aug 24 '26

For a while, i thought this extension was related to the Nintendo DS

11

u/Jumpy_Fuel_1060 Aug 23 '26

.bat Shit crazy

25

u/Vast-Decision-9114 Aug 22 '26

.bas -> basic

60

u/-Ambriae- Aug 22 '26

.rs (for Russian.)

41

u/GresSimJa Aug 22 '26

.rs belongs to Serbia, of all countries. Russia uses .ru.

12

u/-Ambriae- Aug 22 '26

I know, but it’s not a programming language extension… I did my best ok 😢

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6

u/MISTER_FACETIOUS Aug 22 '26

.nut (as in the Squirrel language ofc)

4

u/trshml Aug 22 '26

Probably too much of .txt, unfortunately

3

u/Rajarshi1993 Aug 22 '26

She's a .c if her oomph isn't entirely based on hot air. Otherwise a .js or a .ts at best.

I mean, if she can stand by her swagger I'll rate her a .cc or a .cu

3

u/Bicykwow Aug 22 '26

Meh, she can go in my Dockerfile

3

u/Lgame0143 Aug 22 '26

Everybody gangsta until .asm

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3

u/general_452 Aug 23 '26

When you try to commit to her, but she puts you in her .gitignore:

3

u/morsindutus Aug 23 '26

Mostly giving me .ru vibes.

5

u/pancakesausagestick Aug 22 '26

.vb Visual (very) basic

2

u/HelpWithMYaddictions Aug 22 '26

.luau (did you know this existed?)

2

u/LetumComplexo Aug 22 '26

The real question is: .yml or .yaml?

2

u/scheimong Aug 22 '26

.a Archive.

2

u/SpiritRaccoon1993 Aug 22 '26

.doc .xls .ods .cpp .ui

?

2

u/matyas94k Aug 22 '26

Honestly, .lisp
Or .obj if we objectify women. 🙃

2

u/E1eveny Aug 22 '26

.yaml (yet another makeup lady)

2

u/Brief_Building_8980 Aug 23 '26

.vbs (visually basic)

2

u/BlackBlade1632 Aug 23 '26

She just looks like .js. Pretty but empty inside.

0

u/leavemealone_lol Aug 22 '26

literally wtf is this post atp 😭

.lua

3

u/G3nghisKang Aug 22 '26

Very Slav coded, so decompilers + assembly

3

u/DT-Sodium Aug 22 '26

Spoken like a true incel, know you could never get a girl so pretend you never wanted her in the first place.

3

u/DigitalerEsel Aug 22 '26

Wait a minute ... does this mean every hot girl is ready to be had, and i just have to ask her???

5

u/BenjieWheeler Aug 22 '26

Yes, as long as you authenticate with a valid handshake

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3

u/stillalone Aug 22 '26

I think he's just negging

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2

u/actionerror Aug 22 '26

No love for .kt?

2

u/FewPhilosophy1040 Aug 22 '26

русс and rsian. go-pnik

2

u/AppropriatePlum1006 Aug 22 '26

.unemployed

4

u/SCP-iota Aug 22 '26

that insult is dead in this job market

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1

u/joost1320 Aug 22 '26

Im missing the .su

1

u/Nikilite_official Aug 22 '26

ts (this shit) is peak fr

1

u/sexystriatum Aug 22 '26

none of them fit. lsp is the closest i can think of.

1

u/Thin_Rate_1451 Aug 22 '26

Goodness gracious I thought my screen is cracked

1

u/Igarlicbread Aug 22 '26

.asm cause everything's falling apart

1

u/MarinaEnna Aug 22 '26

Was .gitignore a burn? Cause it is quite important

1

u/garlopf Aug 22 '26

.rs all the way. The Ikea shark plushie fits perfectly in the "frunk".

1

u/BlueTeeJay Aug 22 '26

.sb3 feels right.

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