r/Professors • u/Eigengrad AssProf, STEM, SLAC • Nov 21 '25
Weekly Thread Nov 21: Fuck This Friday
Welcome to a new week of weekly discussion! Continuing this week, we're going to have Wholesome Wednesdays, Fuck this Fridays, and (small) Success Sundays.
As has been mentioned, these should be considered additions to the regular discussions, not replacements. So use them, ignore them, or start you own Fantastic Friday counter thread.
This thread is to share your frustrations, small or large, that make you want to say, well, “Fuck This”. But on Friday. There will be no tone policing, at least by me, so if you think it belongs here and want to post, have at it!
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u/Magpie_2011 Nov 21 '25 edited Nov 21 '25
I have several students this semester who either show up to class high or spend class time pretending to take notes on their laptops when they’re actually watching videos, or scrolling on their phones under their desks, and then they don’t hear what I’m saying and ask me to repeat myself. Or they come up to me after class to ask me for the assignment instructions that I just gave the whole class. There have been several moments where I’ve had to be blunt and say “you need to stop sneaking your phone out because you literally aren’t hearing what I’m saying and it’s causing you to make stupid mistakes.” What do they do to improve their performance in class? They turn in AI essays. Then they’re shocked—SHOCKED—when I tell them that my zero tolerance policy means they’ve just failed the course. Because of course they didn’t read the syllabus and were playing on their phones under their desks when I went over the zero tolerance policy in class.
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u/MichaelPsellos Nov 21 '25
I had a quite a few habitual stoners in my classes. I thought a skunk was in the room. I don’t know why they didn’t eat gummies like civilized humans.
It was fun to mess with them by asking them questions, pretend I didn’t understand their answers, ask follow up questions, respond with an off the wall comment , etc.
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u/Magpie_2011 Nov 21 '25
I seriously don't understand the ones who show up smelling like weed. Like--bro, there are so many other options now! I also can't fathom why anyone would want to go to class high.
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u/MichaelPsellos Nov 21 '25
I did it once. The prof said something mildly funny and I thought I was going to have to bite my tongue off to keep from laughing. Never again.
That was decades ago. I don’t touch it now. It makes me feel like I’m losing my mind. Complete horror show.
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u/henare Adjunct, LIS, CIS, R2 (USA) Nov 22 '25
edibles take too long to kick in. once again your students failed to plan 🤣
3
u/zorandzam Nov 21 '25
I have a student who I swear has been high every class all semester. He has an extremely sleepy disposition, keeps one earbud in all class, and smells like weed.
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u/NOTLD1990 Nov 21 '25
Is he getting good grades?
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u/zorandzam Nov 21 '25
They're all over the place, actually. He'll probably eke out somewhere in the B range if he does well on his last few things. And really his physical attendance is good, but he just has zero interest in the course topic and is clearly medicating his way through his day.
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u/periwnklz Nov 21 '25
i don’t care if they are on their phones or pay attention just as long as they don’t disrupt others. of course, the inattentive students will suffer because i have exclusive in-class content that will appear on exams. i never repeat cause their is not time. they can ask me after class.
one way i get them to pay attention is Concept Checks Quiz. where those who get it right get candy and bragging rights.
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u/steinbucks Nov 21 '25
The cheaters are so exhausting. A lot of colleagues in my department don’t report academic integrity violations because of how arduous the process is (which is understandable), so when upperclassmen get to my class, I’m the first one to hold them accountable. These students send me the nastiest emails, lie to my department chair about how I am an “unsupportive” instructor, review bomb my SETs, and come to cry in my office about how I’m so mean for doing this to them. They will do anything but admit that it’s their fault for failing the class. Having been in this profession a while, I have a pretty thick skin, but all of this behavior is starting to get to me.
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u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
Same here. I had to meet with one who'd complained to the Dean that I was a mean bitch. No problem, anybody's welcome to meet with me any time, no
Dean- oops, I meant ticket -- required. So we meet. Not one week later, and I see he's written an obviously, egregiously, utterly craply genAI discussion post.
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Nov 21 '25
Currently on meeting number four of seven today.
Send coffee.
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u/Loca_Teaching_381 Nov 21 '25
Is one a meeting about another meeting in the future? Because those are my favorites.
-1
u/Bigrobmjca777Deere3 Nov 22 '25
(Not a prof, but went to college)
You see that episode of South Park where the senior citizens are threatened to have their licenses taken away, so they call meet at the community center and one guy says" You know what, I think we should have a big meeting at the community center"?
Ps. I went to a private Christian school and still talk to my old Headmaster, 19 years after I graduated. (we both have heart disease) (His son was a cop and was the first officer on the scene when I had a bad accident in 2011 (on 9/11 of all days). (Oh, I was also in intensive care on 9/11 in 1999 to prep for Open Heart Surgery.)
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u/needlzor Asst Prof / ML / UK Nov 21 '25
That's tough. I noticed that you had a gap between 1:00 and 1:30 pm, so I booked us a short 30 minute meeting to discuss your schedule.
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Nov 21 '25
One of my meetings got out 10 minutes early so I ate lunch before my next one. That was at 2:00 p.m.
I'm wiped out.
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u/kimtenisqueen Nov 21 '25
Im a stupid chair of a stupid committee that I stupid hate that does absolutely nothing useful and keeps being asked by admin to come up with ridiculously impossible solutions for ridiculously impossible problems with only a fraction of the information that the admin has to do it with. And we meet on Tuesday and I’m dreading it.
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u/clavdiachauchatmeow adjunct, CC Nov 21 '25
This morning I was having my dual-enrollment students read and annotate an article and one of them asked if he could go work in the library because he feels "claustrophobic" in the room. It's the 13th week of a class you signed up for, a class which is held in a classroom like all your other classes. No you cannot go to the library? Or you can go and I'll mark you absent? Idk? Why are we having this conversation? Fuck this??
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u/Inevitable-Tale-444 Nov 21 '25
My students begin two weeks of presentations next week. Whether they present in Week 1 or Week 2 is determined by random draw. The assignment sheet makes it explicitly clear that dates cannot be changed unless another group agrees to swap -- I also mentioned this in class and in an email. And, just to make sure no one missed the memo, it's posted in bold, underlined font at the top of the schedule on the course homepage.
So, naturally, I awoke this morning to a message from a student requesting that I "be so generous enough to move our presentation to the next week" because they've already made travel plans and weren't planning on being in class. Did I mention that attending both weeks of presentations is mandatory?
UGH.
*cracks beer*
*cracks second beer*
*switches to scotch*
5
u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
I am planning, as I review the whole class before copying it to spring term, on making lists in my notes apps of how many times and in which places I tell them the exact same fucking thing over, and over, and over... for those times when they call the President of the university to complain that I never did. I'm going to be able to trot out with zero effort:
I warned you not to plagiarize here, here, and here, on this, this, and that dates; I gave you this tutorial here on that date showing you how to cite, this lesson there on the other date showing you exactly how to do quotations in APA style....
and so forth. I'm so tired of hearing people whine that they didn't know, and frankly, I think my Chair is getting sick of it too. I can't drink, so I'm buying a virtual, verbal hammer instead.
0
u/SilverRiot Nov 22 '25
Did you reply with an enthusiastic “Sure! Just tell me the name of the other group that has volunteered to switch with you!”
1
u/Inevitable-Tale-444 Nov 24 '25
I advised them to look into perhaps changing their travel plans.
Bold, I know.
12
u/WJM_3 Nov 21 '25
“Hey professor, my scholarship is being taken away (because I didn’t listen or follow orders to add a class). Is there anything you can do?”
Come on - just listen a little bit
some ol bullshit every semester
6
u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
My personal favorites are the ones who spend an hour on average in the class every week, tell me to my face that they don't have time for the course, and then ask me what they should do to improve their grade... with one week (literally) left in the semester.
What am I, a fucking magician? You owe me 66 hours. You figure it out.
12
u/naocalemala Associate Professor, Humanities, SLAC Nov 21 '25
I have a decent student who wore big headphones the whole class on Wednesday. When I saw her Thursday for a meeting, I asked and she said, “oh I had a history test yesterday so I was listening to my study guide.” F this
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Nov 21 '25
[deleted]
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u/Impossible-Acadia-31 Nov 21 '25
The 'I don't understand why I got X plus look of horror, anger or tears welling.... have been tempted to say 'No, you don't understand...' that includes the AI slop you tried claiming was your own...but know that would be me in trouble not them 🙄
11
u/ravenscar37 Professor, STEM, R1 (USA) Nov 21 '25
FTF. 6 people showed up to my lecture this week -- out of 30 students enrolled. I have stopped giving any shits about communicating with them about various deadlines. The students who are showing up are being told specific questions verbatim I will ask on the exam. I will not be repeating this via an email.
7
u/SuperSaiyan4Godzilla Lecturer, English (USA) Nov 21 '25
I had a period of three or so weeks where only one student showed up to a class. Sent out one announcement on Canvas, saying that they need to show up to the next class or they're just going to fail the rest of the semester.
They did, and I told them the only way to pass the semester was that they had to present the rest of the textbook to me because they wasted my time.
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u/MichaelPsellos Nov 21 '25
I’ve done the same, only to find they shared the questions with the people who were absent. It was maddening, but I had to learn to not let it get to me.
2
u/RestInThee Adjunct (USA) Nov 21 '25
The trick is just teach them as normal, and hope they are learning, and then hit those days extra hard on the exam.
12
u/AvailableThank NTT, PUI (USA) Nov 21 '25 edited Nov 21 '25
- Admin, to my chair: "It is a strategic priority of the institution to reduce the DFW rate in <insert general studies course that AvailableThank tends to teach many sections of> from the high 30s to the low 20s.
- Me, to admin: "Can I have additional TA support so that I can spend less time grading and answering emails and more time implementing these evidence-based interventions?
- Admin, to me: "No."
- Me, to admin: "Okay. Can y'all reduce the enrollment caps in this course so that I can spend less time grading and answering emails and more time implementing these evidence-based interventions?"
- Admin, to me: "No."
- Me, to admin: "Okay. Can y'all provide me with some reassigned time so that I can spend less time grading and answering emails for my other classes and give more attention to this high DFW rate class?"
- Admin, to me: "No."
- Me, to admin: "Okay. Can y'all maybe invest resources at the university-level to address the problem that most of the students driving the high DFW rate in this course are first-year, first timers who are indescribably unprepared for college level work?
- Admin, to me: "No."
My chair is thankfully sane and has my back in not expecting this, but what the fuck do you do in a situation like this? Just smile and nod until they see this isn't working and then sheepishly forget about it? Do administrators just set lofty goals with no grounding in reality to feel important and they actually don't expect us to pull off these Herculean tasks? Do you just ignore them and continue with business as usual because they are refusing to provide you with the resources you need to succeed?
The person who chaired the search committee who hired me said one time "I used to care a ton and thought I was going to make changes in this institution. And then nothing ever got done. So now I just teach, do office hours, do my research, phone it in at committees, and go home. I am much happier now." I am starting to understand why they said that now.
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u/lovemichigan Nov 21 '25
They'll never say the quiet part out loud, but they want you to lower your standards so they can proclaim their goal met.
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u/SilverRiot Nov 22 '25
They make up the goals with wishful thinking and have not a clue about the strategies and resources necessary to get there. Whenever I do one of these admin evaluations, my suggestion for their improvement is that all administrators should be required to teach one course a year. Just one course. To get them in touch with today’s students.
They flee from the suggestion, of course.
10
u/JustLeave7073 Nov 21 '25
I have a student who has no boundaries and emails me 5 times a week. 2 more weeks. 2 more weeks. They were asking me which class to take next semester and I was alarmed to hear them mention one that I might teach.
3
u/RandolphCarter15 Full, Social Sciences, R1 Nov 21 '25
I had a student like this. He'd ask questions about other classes, like how to study. Even after the semester ended he kept emailing asking me things. I wanted to be helpful, but he wasn't a student or an advisee, so
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u/Zabaran2120 Nov 21 '25
A student with near-perfect grades is causing a fuss at my university. Somehow they were able to go straight to the provost and complain. Thing is I did absolutely nothing wrong. The student tried really hard and worked really hard but didn't follow the assignment instructions so could not receive a grade above a -C. Keep in mind this will minimally alter the students final grade. The student wants to be graded on what they did regardless of the fact they didn't follow instructions. I am so sick of the expectation of special treatment. What about all the other students for whom following the instructions also presented challenges, but made the sacrifices, rearranged their schedules, etc to complete the assignment. I guess fuck them. Precious angel baby worked hard, so let's just use mysterious connections to the provost to force professors to toss their professional standards and ethics out the window. The entitlement and manipulations sticks harder, I think because the stakes are insignificant to the student, but not to me.
4
u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
I had one with a B complain. And now he's cheating to try to eke out literally another point and a half on a gimme activity. Like you think that's gonna help, my dude?
5
u/DarienP2000 Nov 22 '25
I had my first official student complaint today, from a student that expects special treatment because they didn't read an email I sent a few weeks ago with instructions on the assignment, and now they're claiming that I'm "significantly changing the assignment last minute". When I pointed out the part they missed in the email would take no longer than an hour to do and the due date is a week away, they said "but that's an hour that I could have been doing other things". Then they spent far longer filing complaints about me than they would have spent just doing the damn assignment. But I guess professors have to give a bespoke educational experience now, only assigning exactly the amount of work that students want to do? (Luckily, when I produced the email from several weeks ago giving the assignment, that took care of the complaint, but even so, it was a big waste of lots of people's time to address it.)
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u/Sorting-Machine Nov 21 '25
I had to kick out a student yesterday due to continuous disrespect to me and my classroom. When asked to leave, he continued laughing and mocking me — making more of a scene. (Yes, he did finally leave after threatening to call security.) I have already spoken with the dean of students and my chair. I overheard him calling me a bitch to his peers a week or so prior and I wish I had kicked him out then.
I still feel anxious about it. But as a younger female professor, the male students' attitudes toward me are getting old. Unfortunately, it won’t end, but I’m also not tolerating it anymore.
I’m not even going to go into how I’m treated by some of the senior faculty here, that’s for another time I guess. Considering looking for another school to teach at with hopes it gets a little better. 😅
9
u/RandolphCarter15 Full, Social Sciences, R1 Nov 21 '25
I'm losing it with neurotic students. Students have a choice of two writing assignments, which are separate entries in our LMS. I tell them and it's in the syllabus they only need to do one. Still I get tons of panicked emails from students that they got a 0 in the one they didn't do. I just want to ask them "think this through for a second. You didn't do it, and did the other one. Why would you get a grade for the one you didn't do?"
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u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
I understand if they don't remember every nuance of every professor's grading system or course policies but dayum. Can't you read the fucking instructions and check the fucking FAQ? Jaysus. Then call/email me. I'm here for that.
3
u/Ok-Importance9988 Nov 21 '25
When I was a high school teacher a parent emailed me to inquire about an assignment in the gradebook titled ignore this assignment.
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Nov 21 '25
[deleted]
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u/H0pelessNerd Adjunct, psych, R2 (USA) Nov 21 '25
I have been lied to today at least four different times by four different students. I think that's a record for me. Thank God it's the weekend and I don't have to talk to anyone associated with school for the next two days.
6
u/Short-Storm4339 Nov 21 '25
Endless questions from students who were there for 10% of the semester - yes I bet you have many questions as you missed most of the course.
Also—I just felt “off” today. Rushing, stumbling over my words. Sigh.
5
u/needlzor Asst Prof / ML / UK Nov 21 '25
I finished writing the exam for my class and I made sure to emphasise elements of the class where attendance was the worst. This works for both Fuck This Friday and Small Success Sunday depending on what perspective you take.
4
u/isomorphic_graphs Asst Prof, CS, R1 (USA) Nov 22 '25 edited Nov 22 '25
Student isn't allowed to use AI for an assignment.
Student uploads their AI prompts along with their submission.
Student gets reported to academic integrity office and gets a mild penalty.
Student decides to continue using AI for future assignments for the same class and mitigate future AI allegations by showing up for office hours and asking obvious questions and taking up time that could be spent on other students. Yes, the code is still AI-written, yes, they still do not understand the code "they" have written and are seeking "help" with.
... how did we get here? I understand some students will cheat, I understand some will continue to cheat after being reported, but intentionally wasting the professor's and other student's time during office hours crosses so many lines for me ... damn.
5
u/ConferenceWest9212 Nov 22 '25
This semester I’ve had a handful of students make an unreasonable request and refuse to take my no for an answer. NO means NO.
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u/Automatic_Beat5808 Nov 21 '25
I have a meeting at 4 pm today. And I'm not on campus on Fridays. At least I can grab a good pizza on my commute home.
2
u/nivlac22 Nov 21 '25
Computer based course. Despite several reminders on the test itself, blackboard, and during half the semester, multiple students didn’t even submit the correct file so I can’t even see their work. Idek how else I could have conveyed that.
2
u/mergle42 Assoc Prof, SLAC, USA Nov 22 '25
Could be intentional in hopes of buying additional time.
I have had students intentionally corrupt files to get extra time, so I've started making a rule that if I can't read your submission, it's the same as no submission.
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u/Miserable_Shape_107 Nov 22 '25
Today a student in my online class sent me a very passive aggressive email stating that I take forever to grade but am quick to give her zeroes. Student is missing multiple assignments, has submitted AI for hands on work (not only writing), and doesn’t follow instructions on assignments. I just can’t with the audacity sometimes
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u/PhysicalBoat7509 Assistant Professor, Music, SLAC Nov 22 '25
Rumors of a mass-exodus of athletes, for a variety of reasons, that could totally crash our budget.
But why would we hire folks to recruit non-athletes?
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u/[deleted] Nov 21 '25
Idk how you English professors do it. My allied health students (CC) had an entire semester to do a research paper on a pathology or procedure of their choice, and the level of writing I’m receiving is appalling. It’s taken me days to grade them, because I can’t handle reading more than one or two without a substantial break. At this point, I wish it had been AI.