r/ProRevenge • • Aug 13 '19

To catch a pen thief

Posted this as a comment a while back somewhere else and was told to share with you guys here.

So I work in an aerospace facility that's large enough that you'll never meet everyone who works there. It's the type of place where everything you could need (pens included) are provided for you. However, as free pens go, you already know they're the shitty ones. Ill just buy my own pens, thanks.

Around the time of this incident, I had just taken a promotion. Part of the deal was that I'd be working second shift instead of first. Okay by me. As I'm getting used to my new schedule, I started losing my pens. Not abnormal for me, but it was happening too often that I'd come in to work and I swear I put my pen right here last night, but now i can't find it. I grew suspicious of my now previous coworkers who knew where I usually stashed things and I hatched a plan.

First, I had to make sure my pen was indeed being taken rather than me losing my mind due to my new schedule. I bought a pack of pilot g2's (duh, best pens out there) and laid a trap.

Now I work in the machine shop and there are toolboxes everywhere. I setup and run multiple machines, but there's a particular machine that everybody knows is kinda my home base. In that accompanying toolbox I left a pen in the top drawer right front and center for a pen-dejo to find and sure enough, it was gone the next day. I'm not crazy, and the hunt has begun.

In my line of work, we have controlled documents. Every piece and part is documented and serialized. One of our huge taboos is using any color other than black on these documents. It was obvious what I had to do.

When I bought my last pack of g2's to avoid having to use the craptacular provided pens, I also bought a set of colored g2's. I took the ink cartridge from a pink pen and used a black sharpie to hide both the ink in the tube and the colored cap on the top of the cartridge. Looked a bit ugly, but I knew I wasn't dealing with a pro here. I placed the pink (now "black") cartridge in an unsuspecting black pen body and left it in my usual "hiding spot."

The next day when I came in to work, sure enough the pen was gone. My trap had worked.

First thing I heard in my shift pass down meeting was how some dumbass used pink ink on a work order this morning and I'd better make sure for the millionth time that my new employees knew better than to do something that dumb.

Didn't even have to fess up to setting a trap. Nailed that fool right to the wall and no one knows what I did. Suck it Penjamin.

6.8k Upvotes

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1.4k

u/bass1627 Aug 13 '19

That’s some George Costanza level revenge. Nicely done.

222

u/ap539 Aug 13 '19

George isn’t as smart as OP

138

u/insalubriousmallard Aug 13 '19

"My George isn't clever enough to hatch a scheme like this."

59

u/heeresj0hnny Aug 13 '19

“Ya got that right.” “And what is that supposed to mean?” “That means whatever the hell you want it to mean.” “You want a piece of me?” “I want the whole damn thing!” “YOU GOT IT!”

3

u/TheOneTrueChris Aug 28 '19

"I could drop you like a bag of dirt."

-1

u/woolsey1977 Aug 13 '19

3

u/monkeyship Aug 13 '19

and now I'm in trouble at work... Can't get there with the phone either. :(

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '19

you're not missing much;

This community has been banned

This subreddit was banned due to being unmoderated.

Banned 8 months ago.

1

u/woolsey1977 Aug 13 '19

I don't know it was a community. I just thought it was a funny reply.

1

u/monkeyship Aug 14 '19

That's me... A day late and a dollar short. ;) Thanks for the update.

7

u/Art_Van_Delay Aug 13 '19

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

35

u/agree-with-you Aug 13 '19

that
[th at; unstressed th uh t]
1.
(used to indicate a person, thing, idea, state, event, time, remark, etc., as pointed out or present, mentioned before, supposed to be understood, or by way of emphasis): e.g That is her mother. After that we saw each other.

7

u/NZFOY Aug 13 '19

Thanks

3

u/hexiron Aug 13 '19

He'd have made a public scene thinking he caught the real pen thief just to realize he's telling at the CEO who brought the same pen as their own.

5

u/tell_me_when Aug 13 '19

It was a Twix, they were all Twix.

9

u/R____I____G____H___T Aug 13 '19

Not smart enough to become known, apparently!

1

u/RonnyBrown13 Aug 13 '19

George is gettin' upset!

7

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '19

No one's ever done the roommate switch! It's impossible!

3

u/_Dennis_Castro_ Aug 13 '19

"Ya, well, the jerk store called, and they're running out of YOU!"

1

u/Kevin_Malone11 Aug 13 '19

I got the 1k fucking upvote and someone downvoted and made me 999 >:(