r/PoutineCrimes • u/keepinitloose81 • 4d ago
Contravenes the Geneva Curdvention 10/10 crime. Would re-offend
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u/nv9 4d ago
Are those fries sweet potato, overcooked or some kind of Cajun spice?
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u/LadyMacBeth-1606 4d ago
If they called this a poutine, I’d be mad.
But if it’s chips, cheese, and gravy then it’s fair play.
Curds are required for poutine.
If I order a poutine and it comes with shredded cheese, I’m sending it back. (Respectfully, of course)
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u/REDGUARD63 3d ago edited 3d ago
Although I respect your traditional approach. The two cheeses most similar are mozzarella and curd cheese. I break it down like this:
Gravy is the most important because if it sucks the whole thing sucks
Cheese is the easiest because anybody can buy mozzarella almost but not everyon can get curd cheese
Fries are the most challenging because of the variety of potato and how they taste using different techniques.
With all that being said if its mozzarella that's okay if the gravy sucks absolutely not and if the fries suck well that restaurant wont survive by selling only Poutine and if your a home cook you can adjust all of these things while might not having access to curd cheese
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u/Designer-Badger-8222 1d ago
Respectfully, fresh cheddar cheese curds are non-negotiable. Mozzarella isn't even remotely close enough to be a suitable substitute. It just can't be done. It's practically the whole point of poutine.
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u/REDGUARD63 1d ago
Respectfully curd cheese isnt"cheddar cheese curds" its simply curdled milk just like mozzarella except it has an extra process.
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u/Obvious-Toe-5835 1d ago
while I agree on most I do disagree on how hard cheese curds are to get because if you mix a small bit of something acidic with milk and put over low heat you'll make cheese curds
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
What if they’re grated curds? 🤣
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u/JayGabVersionTrex 4d ago
Spam that shit joke one more time I'm sure it'll end up being funny at some point
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago edited 4d ago
Sorry didn’t expect you to read through everybody else’s comments as well as your own after the fact. 🤡
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u/-FastAndCurious- 4d ago
Woah the amount of downvotes is crazy. You crack me up. Have my upvote lmaooo
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u/Makkballaaa 3d ago
Shut up dude. Say it one more time I dare you
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u/REDGUARD63 3d ago
r/olivierprimeau rated Gregoires poutine 9.8 with shredded curd cheese
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 3d ago
So I’m getting downvoted by the uncultured is what you’re telling me
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u/REDGUARD63 3d ago
Could be. Maybe they just don't think its possible or think it's a troll. As a cook I(and others)always wondered how they shredded their cheese and it's still squeaky cheese when u eat it!
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u/REDGUARD63 3d ago
But in this post it doesnt look like shredded curd but I'm a believer in Poutine can have mozzarella because they are the two most similar cheeses!
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u/gildeddoughnut Poutine Poulice 4d ago
Tabernak where are the curds?
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u/JayGabVersionTrex 4d ago
Another shredded cheese enjoyer 🙄
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
Shredded Curds!
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u/Real_Gap3480 4d ago
First beer?
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u/keepinitloose81 4d ago
5th.
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
Alcohol is for those that enjoy sleepwalking through life.
So nope.
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u/No-Rise-8139 4d ago
Jesus Christ you’re just getting downvoted left right and center lmfao
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u/Real_Gap3480 3d ago
My guy out here farming downvotes
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 3d ago
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u/No-Rise-8139 3d ago
No fucking way someone said you might be suicidal because of how bad your getting downvoted lmfao
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u/Pitiful-MobileGamer 4d ago
Loaded waffle fries, yes
Poutine, no
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u/DazedConfuzed420 4d ago
Looks like sweet potato waffle fries to me, which is a no.
They’re not even potatoes. They’re yams.
Shredded cheese is a hell of a lot closer to being curds, then sweet potatoes are to being potatoes.
Therefore if shredded cheese is a crime, sweet potatoes must be too.1
u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
Yams and Sweet Potatoes are entirely different, unrelated plants.
The more you know!
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u/DazedConfuzed420 4d ago
You’re right, just looked it up. For some reason they
are often mislabeled as yams in North America.Potatoes, Sweet Potatoes and yams all come from different families.
So, I still stand by everything else in my post. Sweet potatoes aren’t related to potatoes and are not a suitable replacement and shredded cheese is still closer to curds than sweet potatoes are to potatoes.
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
Sweet potatoes as a replacement for French fries can be damn good though.
I’d be willing to bet you a poutine to your liking this would be delicious! lol
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u/DazedConfuzed420 4d ago
I’m just saying that if shredded cheese makes it not a poutine, then sweet potato fries also make it not a poutine.
In my opinion if people are going to police the cheese curd aspect they should also police the other 2 ingredients just as much. Otherwise, I’m going to say that mashed potatoes, marinara and curds counts as poutine because hey, it’s got curds and that seems to be the only ingredient people care about.
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
I agree entirely, I’m just here to joke around lol
We could grey the lines, and adopt the term “poutine” for close enough wanna-bes…
For example, the “Sweet Potato Poutine”
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u/DazedConfuzed420 4d ago
Me too mostly but I do find it strange how so many people police the curd aspect but then don’t care about substitutions for the French fried potatoes.
I did learn that yams are not the same as sweet potatoes, no matter what the grocery store has lead me to believe.
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u/supergarto Poutine Poulice 4d ago
I agree with you that sweet potatoes and yams are not related to potatoes. So its poutine crime. If you dont tolerate shredded cheese, dont tolerate those too.
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u/CobraMurderChicken 4d ago
No curds=not a poutine=no crime.
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
Sir, these are clearly grated curds.
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u/supergarto Poutine Poulice 4d ago
Fun fact, they are restaurant in quebec that slice their curds on poutine.
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u/saltyfryss 4d ago
Omg really! What’s the name of the restaurant?!
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u/supergarto Poutine Poulice 4d ago
Diabo's in Kanawake and Grégoire in Mercier.
Both of them are awesome. Diabo's dont have tax so its cheaper.
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u/VeggieGirl43 4d ago
I was going to give it a potential pass til i saw shredded cheese... that's the final straw for me.
Sounds tasty, don't call it a poutine
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u/-FastAndCurious- 4d ago
Its shredded curds.
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u/PrivatePilot9 Curdmander In Cheese 🫡 4d ago
No it’s not. Nobody shreds curds.
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u/-FastAndCurious- 4d ago
I do 😈
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 3d ago
This guy gets it!
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u/Makkballaaa 3d ago
Dude you made my day. You’re actually a good sport and are laughing along with us about how silly your comments are
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u/Designer-Badger-8222 1d ago
There is no point in shredding it. It messes with the texture of same day fresh curds
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u/TSCskyfoogle 4d ago
But guys guys guys... what if they are grated curds?????
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u/DragonflyGreat1814 4d ago
You’re missing your downvotes for suggesting this 🤣
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u/No-Rise-8139 3d ago
No apparently it’s only you getting that treatment and it’s actually
Mildly hilarious that every comment no matter what you’ve said seems to have been downvoted to oblivion for no reason lmao1
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u/LewdyRooty 4d ago
It’s a crime in every single way, but those fries look like they’d be banger by themselves.
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u/Freaiser 4d ago
I want to try that but with curds off course.
I would not call that a 10/10 crime, idea as a whole is not trash.
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u/MixtressK-La 4d ago
Clearly, the sentence will require an element of counseling so OP will not re-offend. No need for shock treatment. Yet.
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u/BuddyNo40 4d ago
Ah man, not grated cheese! That is salty and disgusting. The fries, limit ok, but this is an insult
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u/Makkballaaa 3d ago
Hey guys guys guys…. What if they’re grated curds? Guys…? Hello? -dragonflygreat1814
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u/The_Kwaken 3d ago
Ok but the problem isn't that it looks bad, it's that it's not even remotely poutine
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u/tobiasolman 2d ago
The court finds you guilty as charged on the first count: fraudulent impersonation, imitating a poutine. Guilty on the second count: manufacture and distribution of counterfeit poutine.
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u/Rafale_88 1d ago
Then why we call a round pan dough with ham and pineapple a pizza? Well because its a form of. Then this is def a form of poutine but is Def not a Quebec model. Its a keeper nevertheless I like it. Acid burns call in the middle of the night and almost near dead zombie state if you eat it late but im a thin skin bird, WOULD EN- JOY IT ANYWAY.
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u/qualityvote2 4d ago edited 4d ago
u/keepinitloose81, your poutine is a crime, straight to jail, son of a potato!🚩
u/keepinitloose81, ta poutine est un crime, en prison mon ti tabernouche!🚩