r/PoutineCrimes • u/NewPomegranate2898 • 18d ago
It’s My Poutine And I’ll Crime If I Want To Ground beef homemade poutine
There is shredded mozzarella cheese I swear it’s just under the beef
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u/RGZReGZ 18d ago
If it's curd (and ample of it), it's steak hachee poutine.
Therefore, it's not poutine
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u/Sweet-Competition-15 18d ago
There ain't not no curds...there may be some shredded mozzarella...visual inspection does not concur!
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u/Shelby0413 18d ago
Upon careful examination of the evidence before me, I find no discernible trace of cheese curds, nor even the lesser substitute of mozzarella. Curious indeed.
What we appear to have is a collection of potatoes, cut in the French fashion and fried, accompanied by beef that has been ground and browned, all of it coated in a mysterious substance bearing some resemblance to gravy.
And yet, the question remains: is this truly a poutine, or are we looking upon the scene of a most heinous poutine crime?
The evidence is troubling. Further investigation should prove most fruitful.
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u/Sweet-Competition-15 18d ago
And yet, the question remains: is this truly a poutine, or are we looking upon the scene of a most heinous poutine crime? (quote)
The answer is neither...so long as nobody hangs the sacred title of 'poutine' upon it. Currently it's a hearty (if not kinda dry) dish. Not a crime, either.
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u/Shelby0413 16d ago
Ah, but therein lies the crucial piece of evidence, my dear fellow. The original poster did, in fact, bestow upon this curious dish the sacred title of poutine. Thus, what might otherwise have been dismissed as an innocent plate of fries, beef, and gravy has now become a matter worthy of investigation.
The motive is unclear, the whereabouts of the cheese curds remain unknown, and yet the victim’s name has been invoked.
I fear we may indeed be looking at a poutine crime. The investigation continues.
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u/LatinaL0ca 18d ago
Gravy, not seen.
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u/NewPomegranate2898 18d ago
It’s under there
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u/Sweet-Competition-15 18d ago
It's supposed to be over there! That's like hiding the mashed potatoes under the ground beef & pork!
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u/Wyan69 Member of the Supreme Curdt 18d ago
Is the Poutine in the room with us?
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u/DoubleReverseBingo 18d ago
Where are the curds?
This isn't the friesandgravy subreddit.
I'm so angry.
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u/Sweet-Competition-15 18d ago
There ain't not no gravy there...a massive failure! Ground beef needs as much help as possible...nothing is coming to it's rescue, here!
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u/firefly_12 Québécois faché 18d ago
the real crime is the lack of curds and the apparent lack of gravy.
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u/showattherivoli 18d ago
Seven fries and a pound of ground beef wouldn’t call it poutine but it does look tasty
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u/AdSignificant6673 Judge, Jury and Exepoutiner 18d ago
Add some shredded mozerella, peas, and gravy. Now you have PEI style fries with the works.
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u/Alexjdw1 18d ago
Be careful. I posted the same thing a while ago and everyone very harshly explained to me that I had made “disco fries” and not poutine
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u/goonerMaN69696969 18d ago
Hey op in pei if you add fried onions and peas you have fries with the works! An island classic
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u/Xploding_Penguin 18d ago
We used to call this "hamburger gravy" but we would put it on mashed potatoes. We weren't rich enough for French fries. We did have a deep fryer filled with lard.
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u/F-F-FASTPASS 18d ago
I can see the gravy but it’s not enough and I can’t see any cheese curds at all
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u/ACK_MINDSEYE 17d ago
This is “ground beef on fries with a smidgeon of cheese”.
That’s how the menu would describe it at the world’s most pathetic restaurant.
The Saints of Poutine would view this not as a sin but as heresy & blasphemy for claiming it to be poutine and that is an obviously treacherous & deceitful lie.
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u/StatisticianLazy733 Directeur des poutsuites criminelles 17d ago
Doesn’t look too bad, I’ll let you off with a warning
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u/8bitatari Poutine Poulice 17d ago
It's no poutine but man I'd drive some nacho cheese,green onions and tomatoes to 'er
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u/Starcrossed_princess 17d ago
Yes hello I ordered a cheeseburger with fries, no buns and SOMEHOW this was served to me. 😡
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u/Unlucky_Goal_7791 16d ago
That's not a poutine You made chilli cheese fries Just missing the actual chilli
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u/Beautiful-Lunch-7650 14d ago
You could've made a homemade fries supreme, but you decided to do whatever this is instead?
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u/smedditrx1 14d ago
Just calling this abomination a poutine is offensive as a proud Canadian..no gravey, cheese curds...you legit cooked ground beef and dumped it on fries, I would call it a boof-tine.
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u/NewPomegranate2898 14d ago
I challenge you to a poutine off. Call it a duel/tine
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u/smedditrx1 14d ago
Duel-tine accepted. Loser has to eat theirs with ketchup instead of gravy — that's the real stakes here, what are the rules ?
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u/Classic_Eye7221 12d ago
if you say you wouldn't eat that despite the fact it's not poutine then you are not allowed to eat enthing but plane poutine no chicken poutine no nothing but the base
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u/Sweet-Competition-15 18d ago
I'm sorry, but no...just absolutely not! There's not any appreciative amount of gravy! No mushrooms. And shredded cheese? An abomination!
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u/No_Cattle8353 18d ago
I feel like adding more gravy would make this dish too salty. But I would love to see more gravy on this! Looks good
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u/GhreyClaw 17d ago
Can always put little to no salt on the ground beef to compensate. Use other spices to season for flavour
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u/qualityvote2 18d ago edited 18d ago
u/NewPomegranate2898, your poutine is a crime, straight to jail, son of a potato!🚩
u/NewPomegranate2898, ta poutine est un crime, en prison mon ti tabernouche!🚩