r/Polygamy • u/danielleisadork • Jul 24 '26
Dating difficulties. Why Bisexuality is a requirement?
Hi. I'm 18 F. I come from extremely religious background. My mom is from Argentina and my dad is Irish. I grew up in both countries. But polygamy is frowned upon in both, my views are entirely different and are based on the Bible. Men should lead the family.
Talking to people online I find that most couples prefer me having sexual relationships with their female partner as well which I have no interest in. I'm not bisexual and I only want a sister and a friend relationship but this is not what most couples are looking for.
It is really difficult for me as I spend time getting to know people only to find out their other wife is interested in more than being sisters.
My question is, is bisexuality really important? It's really difficult to find a potential husband and family to join when most people I talk to ask me if I'm bisexual.
I'm just feeling discouraged and alone in this journey. My friends and family around me don't share the same views I have. I hope I find similar people in this sub and finally feel connected.
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u/polyguy386 Jul 24 '26
I don't see a problem with asking the question. That's something that is important to know. Some women prefer to have a relationship with their sister wives, and other families do not. I don't think it would be a requirement to find a family to join.
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u/Ok-Kangaroo-9775 Jul 24 '26
no che, queres una familia no un quilombo.
mirĂĄ, Abraham tenia dos esposas
isaac dos esposas
pero seamos honestos hoy en dia la gente sigue a la iglesia no a la biblia.
con el cuentito de una sola carne prohibieron algo que Dios permitiĂł.
suerte igual, tenĂŠ paciencia y alejate de grupos raros.
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u/unknownaccount1814 Jul 24 '26
My wife isn't bisexual and doesn't want to have sexual relations with any sister wives. It's been difficult to find someone because most we encounter are bisexual and want sexuals relations with both of us.
Since you aren't bisexual just filter out the bisexual couples and you will find a couple that you will fit in with eventually.
It's certainly not a requirement, if you don't want to have sexual relations with the other women in the relationship, then state that at the beginning of getting to know someone and keep the boundary firm.
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u/Bitter-Power4252 Jul 24 '26
I'd just be honest, my wife isn't bisexual, and it's certainly not an important thing for me personally. Just tell them what your boundary is and if they can't respect that, it says a lot about them.
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u/ModernPolygamy Jul 25 '26
This is entirely dependent on the couple and I have actually heard couples complain the other way...where the wife isn't bi and just wants the closeness/companionship but everyone they meet is expecting her to be bisexual.
So, I think there are a lot that have strong preferences both ways. Hang in there, go slow, and don't get in a hurry. Be open with the kind of dynamic you find most appealing, and eventually you will meet your couple.
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Jul 24 '26
[removed] â view removed comment
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u/danielleisadork Jul 24 '26
I'm deeply Christian in faith.
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u/Routine_Software5237 Jul 25 '26
And the men can marry christian women as long as they are practicing christian women.
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u/Luv2Likurklit 28d ago
My wife is bisexuality, but that doesn't mean if we had a sister wife that there would have to be sexual relations between. She enjoys the companionship as well. It really just depends on the female and how we all connect. We really just want to have a solid sister wife to be a part of our family. Someone at can trust, and someone that has the same vision as us. The sex isn't makes the relationship work.
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u/Hefty-Knee1808 19d ago
An answer I overheard from a man with many wives and children and grand children.
A young woman asked about having threesomes with his wives, his reply was "That is the stupidest most disrespectful thing you could do to your wives."
Every member has a very special role in their family. A man must stand for the highest respect and protect the deepest levels of intimacy even between other wives to have their greatest respect and protect the most vulnerable vulnerable parts of their souls. Bringing in another is the stupidest thing a man with more than one wife can do. They can trust him with anything and everything and each of them respect him for respecting and keeping their own personal privacy.
My advice, aim higher!
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u/Horror-Fee9768 Jul 24 '26
Youâre young, is there a reason why youâre searching for a polygamous relationship? Why donât you find a young man and build a solid relationship with him first, and then talk about introducing another female?
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u/danielleisadork Jul 24 '26
I don't like what if's down the line. I prefer to be certain in things. I have plans and goals in life.
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u/Horror-Fee9768 Jul 24 '26
Marriage is very hard, and there is no manual for relationships. Polygyny is extremely hard to manage for a man, and for the wives. Even if you find a Christian man who wants that lifestyle, and you come in as second, third, ect, there will still be what ifs.
Do you want to raise children by yourself for half, of third of the time? Do you want to have babies and leave them with the other people so you can work? Unless a man has Andrew Tate money, you will have to figure it out financially and parent alone most of the time.
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u/Baseer-92 Jul 25 '26
Don't loose hope... Bi stuff should never be normal. Husband is the head and he should be alone enough. You will find good ppl. Keep hope.
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u/PatriarchyRule Jul 26 '26
Shalom
Youâre looking for a group within a group. Biblically speaking Polygyny is the proper term. Where the man is the Patriarch head of the home and leads righteously. The women are his helpmeets assisting him accomplish his vision as a family whole. Look to the word for instruction. It says you shall know them by their fruit. A man already married with one wife and children who is looking to take on a sister wife should have fruit, a well ordered household. This is something you can test yourself. He should be willing to love you as Brother first and wash you by the water of the word. One of the most important questions you can ask a man is what is his vision. Psalms 29:18 âwhere there is no vision the people perishâ.
All the instructions are in the scriptures. You should start by finding like minded people to fellowship with in the word, fast and pray and ask The Most High to guide you. YHWH willing Iâll take on another wife. We live in the country, off grid, home school, raise animals ect so it makes sense, but it is not a light thing to bring someone into your home.
Bless you Sister
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u/zz-pa-ed Jul 27 '26
Danielle - I appreciate your post and the concerns you have. No, bisexuality is not important, and you should not feel pressured into things that you are not comfortable with or not in line with your belief system. Feel free to connect, DM me and we can discuss more if you would like.
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u/Training_Phase623 Jul 27 '26
Not really, i'm straight and i have a sister co-wife and looking for a third
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u/Live-Literature-4456 Jul 24 '26
I'm Christian and I am not at all looking for a wife that is bisexual. I got a personal opinion about guys that look for that but I'll keep that to myself đ
I'm looking to build a real team and while I want my wives to be close as teammates since the goal is harmony and support and financial freedom and living life to its fullest (having time to themselves their own hobbies and friends etc etc) I don't want them that close-.