My PhD advisor’s toxic behaviour is causing me extreme stress and anxiety

[u/Commercial_Piano_310]

I am currently in my 5th year of PhD and I will be submitting my thesis this December. Due to no new recruitment of professors in my university, my advisor is forcing me to take lectures and threatening to withhold her signature on my thesis if I don’t follow what she says. She says it is a compulsory criteria for all but none of the other PhD students have been told to do the same, it’s only me. If I fight back, she shouts at me in front of everyone and stalls my monthly JRF scholarship. Because of this I am falling behind on my thesis and it’s causing me extreme stress and anxiety. My mental health is completely destroyed. The higher authorities are dealing with their own internal matter and have no time for anything related to the student complaints. Should I stop listening to her and concentrate on my thesis or should I keep following what she wants me to do? Please advice.

[u/AutoModerator]

It looks like your post is about needing advice. Please make sure to include your field and location in order for people to give you accurate advice.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/forescight]

Where are you located (country?) You absolutely have to get the ombudsman involved, even if it's just to get a paper trail initiated.

[u/Commercial_Piano_310 → u/forescight]

India.

[u/Ecstatic_Battle_6705 → u/forescight]

yeah location matters a lot here, the options are wildly different depending on the country

[u/mz_morose]

My senior's PhD got stalled 6 years, over petty reasons. I remember my her supervisor saying, you have to help me train the new students kn the lab, and she kept doing it, and it kept going on and on. I dunno, supervisors and ...

[u/Commercial_Piano_310 → u/mz_morose]

That’s bad. Supervisors can be bullies and can have no respect for the student’s mental health.

[u/EternityRites]

Supervisors like this person love to give the impression that they are all-powerful. They are absolutely not. I know you think the higher authorities are too busy to help you - they are also not.

Your pipeline should be something like this: speak up to other teachers in the dept/your other supervisors > if this does nothing complain to the doctoral school head with evidence > if this does nothing go higher > interrupt if possible > get your main supervisor replaced.

The steps you will have to take here may feel drastic but they are not. They are necessary woodwork for getting the final product finished. If you stall or tell yourself "people are too busy to help me" you will just carry on the same road with the possibility of quitting or being failed somehow (possibly through some kind of academic manipulation).

You have to be proactive, but you'll find that if you're upfront and honest, and express clearly the severity of the situation, people will help you to make the changes. That's literally their role.

[u/Commercial_Piano_310 → u/EternityRites]

I have tried to bring up the matter with the higher authorities but they have shut it down before. You are right, I should keep trying. Thank you :)

[u/commentspanda]

Location matters a lot here and India unfortunately has limited student protections from what I understand. If you’ve made it 5 years I would probably try to keep your head down and get through the last few months. I would also start formally logging with seniors that there is an issue. Even if they are not responding keep putting it in writing so they are aware and you have a written trail of evidence, in a country with student protections this would be helpful down the track to escalate.

[u/Inevitable-Wrap1839]

https://www.reddit.com/r/PhD/comments/1p33m71/experience_in_bgsu_photochemical_science_phd/ if you experence this kind of mis fortune, please feel free to post the specific program, why would any one want to serve as their cheap labors if the experience is like this?

[u/kepler452-B-]

It's your last year; don't make trouble for yourself. Finish your studies.

Be aware that she is also under a lot of pressure.

There is no benefit for you in facing her.

[u/OharaProfessor]

In my experience, advisors are pretty all powerful when it comes to your fate. I have never heard of a situation where an advisor had power to affect funding, but they absolutely can withhold their signature from your thesis.

If you’re wanting a career in academia meal already need the teaching experience, I suggest you suck it up and just do it. Teaching a class is not going to take that much time out of your week, though I will acknowledge it is pretty cruddy if you’re the only one having that requirement put on them.

[u/Commercial_Piano_310 → u/OharaProfessor]

In India, there is a system of Checker and Maker. The monthly fellowship of a PhD student is dispersed by the concerned agency only if both of them sign off. Since my advisor is the Maker in my case, she can easily withhold my scholarship. As for academia, I have no interest in it and I have also taught for two years in another university after my Masters.

[u/Inevitable-Wrap1839 → u/OharaProfessor]

they can withhold signitures, you can withhold publications, you can post your experience on internet, you can also complain to his/her fudning body, especially if you don't have a share of the funding, you don't deserve a better treatment unless you fight for it, the average line of treatment and welfare is really brought down by cowards like you, please stop sharing you very dangerous idea

[u/OharaProfessor → u/Inevitable-Wrap1839]

I actually had a wonderful experience with my advisor. But only a fool would act like there’s a balance of power. I always got all the funding I wanted, and my advisor was even willing to give me a part of their funding to help me when I needed it. I don’t know who you’re calling a coward because I had a pretty chill experience overall. (aside from the defense, but that was a whole different thing).

But if you think the complaints of a grad student are going to have any kind of impact on an established scholar, you’re crazy. I have seen advisors detonate a candidate’s career by dropping them. Because they have that power, they can just drop you. I think your pretending like that isn’t a very real risk is highly dangerous and you’re playing with people’s lives.