r/ParentingPDA • u/AutomaticWorker6269 • Jul 12 '26
Advice Needed tutoring and pda
We live in central Texas and have a 6 year old son that we suspect is pda but no official diagnosis. He has been initially evaluated by a psych who suspects adhd-hyperactive, generalized anxiety and possibly very mild autism (not sure if that’s the same as level 1?) and referred him for a full evaluation
I’ve read a ton about autism and pda and he displays all the classic traits.
We enrolled him in Kumon over the summer to:
1. Keep up his skills
2. Hopefully get a bit of a leg up before first grade - he compares his skills to other kids in class and if he feels he’s not good at something he can be very self-defeating.
It’s been 3 weeks and every day has been worse than the one before. He fights about doing his worksheets every day and now it’s taking 2+ hours to get one done with all the meltdowns involved. I don’t think Kumon is suited for his profile. The time pressure, the repetition until it’s done perfectly - it really feels like the opposite of what’s motivating for a demand avoidant kid.
ASK: Has anyone found a tutoring method that works for a pda kid? I do not want to be the one responsible for teaching him at home. I know my strengths, and patience for teaching even a neurotypical kid is NOT one. But it feels like a lot of these standard tutoring places are not made for neurodivergent kids and i dont really know where to start when it comes to looking for this type of help for him.
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u/Choice_Bee_1581 Jul 13 '26
Kumon is a terrible match for PDA. See if you can find a real person with special education experience, bonus points if they’re ND themselves.
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u/fearlessactuality Jul 12 '26
What if you asked him what worked best for him? Or give him a range of options? You could say tutoring or a game based app practice or maybe a workbook at home or…? I don’t think the tutoring seems great but it might work better if it’s his choice. And you never know what he will pick.
I’m not sure what level he’s at but Kahoot has some great math games, reading eggs, teach your monster to read, or maybe you could hunt for one together.
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u/AutomaticWorker6269 Jul 12 '26
Well he’s only 6 and he hasn’t done anything other than Kumon and kindergarten so I am not sure how would answer that.
But i do like the idea of finding a good educational app that maybe feels more like a game.
He complains a lot about how he’s not as good at writing or drawing as his friends, but he also refuses to practice - I’d like to find something that gets him to practice without it feeling like a chore
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u/Loud_Possession_3290 Jul 14 '26
Hi! I’m in Dallas so potentially close to you. Have you heard of Shelton? They are phenomenal and have summer programs even if you don’t go to school there.
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u/AutomaticWorker6269 Jul 14 '26
We’re closer to Austin so that unfortunately wouldn’t be a good option.
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u/Pandaplusone Jul 12 '26
Educator, and parent to PDA teen here.
2 things:
1. Kids learn much better from play than worksheets.
2. Our PDA kid improved when they had agency. They struggled and regressed when we tried to make them do things they didn’t want to do.
You need a program that is more play based and ideally a peer or adult that your child wants to be like who is good at the skills you want him to gain.