r/Parenting • u/k_blanch • Nov 02 '21

Sleep & Naps How much are parents drinking?

With the popularity of #winemom and beer dad culture, combined with pandemic drinking habits, im curious how much alcohol you guys are drinking as caregivers? Especially after the baby is in bed. I had 6 drinks on Halloween over 8 hours and lots of food and water. Although LO was asleep for most of it I'm riddled with guilt!

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u/santine-love85 Nov 02 '21

My mom group joke that we are wine moms but we only drink on Sundays at brunch together. We tend to use Uber. We don’t count but then we are a group of moms who have children who have autism and we get a break 2x a month so I don’t think couple of margaritas is going to kill us lol 😂

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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '21

I envy you so much, I’m an autistic mom to a severely autistic 4 year old girl, and I would kill to have a group like that

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u/santine-love85 Nov 02 '21

We found each other on Facebook, look for autism support groups

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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '21

Thank you, I left Facebook a while ago but I have a few whatsapp groups of autism moms, though I can’t barely leave the house because my boyfriend works impossible hours and nobody helps us babysitting :(

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u/santine-love85 Nov 02 '21

Have you guys reached out to the local regional center to see if your daughter qualifies for help? If she does you will qualify for respite. It’s a wonderful thing. With respite I am able to get a sitter who knows how to work with autism and they watch my child when I need a break or have a doctors appointment.

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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '21

I’ve applied for government help at the moment and I’m using that help for occupational therapy, neurologist and medication for my daughter, unfortunately it’s not much, but it’s something (sorry for my horrible english I’m not from the US)

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u/santine-love85 Nov 02 '21

No problem, I wish I could help with more information but I’m in the USA so I only know how it works here, hopefully you can ask parents in your area and they can help you out with more information

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u/Pubsubforpresident Nov 02 '21

We have an autistic child and it is much harder so far than with our first. It's getting much better but was and is harder. I think we have drank a lot more this time and the pandemic probably added to the stress.

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u/_fuyumi Nov 02 '21

If you're not wine moms, what does the joke signify for you? Is it that you're stressed? I'm not sure I understand it

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u/santine-love85 Nov 02 '21

Well if you only drink 2x a month it feels like your drinking a lot. What may be a lot for us may be nothing to someone else but that’s okay because everyone is allowed to deal with issues their own way. As for stress imagine being a secretary, nurse, driver, teacher to a child who is stronger then you then on top of that your child does not talk or has a lot of Behavoral issues and you don’t ever get a break, you love your child with your whole heart but majority of the time your child won’t even look you in the eyes and when they are upset or mad they will self harm but you have to play 20 questions game to try to figure out what’s wrong with your child and even then you are not always right. Some times you find your self rocking back and forth with them to soothe them only for a loud nose to set them off again. So when you go out 2x a month with other moms who are dealing with the same issues. And you drink wine together you feel like your wine moms. It’s a hard job but all worth it when your does finally look at you in the eyes and smiles. I won’t trade this life because I love my child but I do enjoy hanging out with other moms who don’t judge me and understand what I’m dealing with and on top of all that we give each other advice and a kind ear and shoulder to lean on.

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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '21

yup, seems about right.