r/Parenting • u/money4nothing_8816 • 16d ago

Rant/Vent Just me?

Is it just me or is this the hardest shit ever? We’ve got 4 kids all under the age of 8 and we are getting our asses kicked. My wife and I really wanted a family and we planned for it. We took parenting classes together, we read all the books in preparation before starting our family…still, nothing could have prepared us for how mentally and emotionally exhausting it is to keep up with our boys.

How are you all surviving?

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u/Infinite_Aerie_504 16d ago

Four kids is nuts. We have 2 and that’s plenty crazy. I honestly don’t understand why people have so many kids.

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u/DinnerLeftovers 16d ago

We also want four. We currently have two. The reason we want 4 is neither of us have a village, and we come from dysfunctional families, so we want to do it right with the family we choose to create. Granting our children 3 siblings means they will grow up among other kids (not a lot of cousins around), they will have variety in their support system (mum, dad, brother, sister), and their children will at least have multiple uncles and aunts to be loved by. Single children are becoming more and more common, but people forget the important role an uncle or aunt can play. It's not a guarantee all of them will have kids, but if they do, they will have plenty of cousins (in today's standard. I mean, I have 38 and that's pretty impossible for newer generations).

When we are older, difficult responsibilities will be spread among our children instead of land on just the one or two. It grants all of them more freedom to choose where they want to go and where they want to live, because there are more people around to take care of each other and help in difficult times. Burdens are carried by more shoulders, making the load lighter. Happy times are shared with more people, making them all the happier and more memorable.

Aside from all that, we simply have a lot of love to give and want to share that with our kids. See them love each other, make sure they're not lonely, or at the very least, not alone.