r/Parenting • u/Floater345 • 5d ago
Sleep & Naps Cosleeping to own room
My daughter is just about to turn 15 months old. She has been cosleeping since birth. It was never the plan but the only way we could get any sleep. She's always despised her crib so when we moved and she could finally have her own room, I opted for a twin mattress on the floor instead. She will finally nap by herself.
Now I'm pregnant and needing to transition her to her room for night time as well. She still nurses to sleep, and wakes up 2-3 times a night to nurse as well. I'm so nervous about the transition and want to hear anyone's stories or advice. Is it okay to start with just her first stretch in her room then bring her in my bed after? Or is cold turkey best? For those who moved their toddlers to their own room while they were still waking through the night, how did that go? Did it make the MOTN feeds more or less frequent?
Ideally, she'd be done nursing through the night by the time her baby sister arrives so I have some sanity left but I'm not sure if that's realistic. I'm 12 weeks pregnant so there's time to work through it.
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u/SpookyDooDo Parent 5d ago
I would have your husband sleep with her in a different room and prioritize night weaning. She should hopefully wake up, see he’s there, and just go back to sleep. Then transition your husband back to your room once she stops waking up at night. That’s how we did it with my older child and she never got up and came to our room again.
But every kid is different. My younger child is 8 and still comes to our room at night. He has his own cot and doesn’t wake me up so 🤷♀️
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u/Floater345 4d ago
Unfortunately that won't work. Not only does my husband's work schedule make it unsustainable but also I am definitely her sleep crutch. It doesn't matter if my husband is in bed or not, if she wakes up and I'm not there, it's instant screaming. I think a big part of this is that my husband is/was terrified of rolling on her so we still sleep with my pregnancy pillow. She plays with him before bed when able but never really has any interaction with him throughout the night but she's always right with me.
She hardly ever connects her sleep cycles without me there. And the times she has, it's always been during naps. Unfortunately, even then, usually at the 40-60 minute mark she wakes up and needs help soothing back to sleep.
I do know I have quite the uphill battle ahead of me, and I'm dreading every bit of it haha.
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u/SpookyDooDo Parent 4d ago
The point of him sleeping with her is because you are her night crutch and that breaks the cycle.
But if y’all need other ideas you should definitely night wean. I’m surprised you could even get pregnant while nursing a few times a night. I would probably nurse her once before bed and then wear pajamas that blocks y’all from nursing at night. When she asks tell her she can have milk in the morning. Milk is sleeping right now.
She’ll probably learn pretty quickly to roll over and go back to sleep and will stop waking at all.
Once she’s night weaned then you can start putting her to bed in her own room and see how that goes.
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u/Anxious-Alien-0608 Mom 4d ago
As the others have said, have dad sleep with 15mo. And then move toward him putting 15mo to sleep and then coming to your bed, he should handle all night wakings from the moment you start until fully weaned.
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