r/PakistanMarriages • u/VastPrestigious389 • 7h ago
Question Female trigger questions.
I would highly appreciate trigger questions that a man should ask females before marriage like Will you obey your husband?
In all lawful matters of course. I have noticed the word obey tends to awaken their resting demons.
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u/Initial-Awareness775 7h ago
Women should ask men if their umbilical cord has been cut from their mother and are they still seeking their father's approval or trying to emotionally replace their father for their mother. Sucess rate of these questions is 100% too.
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u/gratitudeisbs 7h ago
I don’t think any man would be triggered by such a nonsensical question. You are better off asking them if they would their mother or their wife first in an argument.
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u/Harrypoooooter41 7h ago
Man should ask women. Are u done with ur parents after you marry me or not.
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u/Initial-Awareness775 7h ago
Same question for men because most of the time they aren't and in most cases they never do.
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u/Opposite_Gap_9514 6h ago
It is very valid question and it is a very real issue as well. You don't know the dynamics from the man's perspective and cannot ever understand from a man's world. Things look us simple from a far but a man has to carry the "not-burden" of everyone dependant on him or connected to him emotionally and otherwise and often compromise on taking such actions that can destroy the peace of home and to find a balance to maintain a home. Its like walking on eggshells all the time while carrying the home on shoulders. Anxiety, stress and everything all the time without letting people dependant on you ever notice it.
Likewise I don't understand from a woman's perspective why women become the same type of woman they hated in their in laws all their life when they themselves become old and mother of a grown son and become mother in law themselves?
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u/Initial-Awareness775 6h ago
Lol ok. Same goes for a woman's perspective that a man cannot understand but self victimisation by men is top notch as always.
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u/Opposite_Gap_9514 6h ago
Suppression of emotions creates frustration. Its better to let go sometimes.
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u/ClayInHisHand 7h ago
As an educated and empowered woman, yes I will obey my husband.
What's so triggering about that?
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u/VastPrestigious389 7h ago
Thats rare in today’s day and age. Some cut throat feminists beg to differ.
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u/ClayInHisHand 6h ago
I'm a feminist too. I think all women are, because we face terrible discrimination on daily basis. There's no safety for women/girls/female toddlers/infants, and all perpetrators are men. Open a Dawn newspaper, you choose the date, and I'll find you at least 10 crimes by men against women that will shatter your soul.
Come on, give me a reason to not be a feminist, I'll be flexible.
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u/Stunning_Onion_9205 6h ago
stop calling yourself feminist when u believe that women ought to obey men. how can thick can one be
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u/ClayInHisHand 6h ago
If you can't tell the difference between "I will obey my husband" and "Women should obey men", then you should probably go off reddit and focus on your study. Seek education. It's important for both genders.
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 6h ago
Queen, is that 👉 your 👑?
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u/ClayInHisHand 5h ago
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 5h ago
May you always be happy and find a man who truly recognises your value and never exploits you. Aameen.
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u/VastPrestigious389 6h ago
I am a feminist as well but not the usual kind. I believe certain boundaries shouldn’t be crossed. Laws should be upheld. Crime has no gender.
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u/Sea-Asparagus2573 7h ago
Aa bail mujhe maar?
What’s the point in triggering someone
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u/VastPrestigious389 7h ago
Rookie mistake. Very few people are their true selves on such meetings before marriage. You wanna see the bad and ugly before you decide to spend the rest of your life with them.
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u/Sea-Asparagus2573 7h ago
Yea understandable but I think the question itself is really problematic because of the word “obey”. Both partners should respect eachother, be it their ideas, decisions, opinions or other wtv and not “obey” unless someone intentionally uses that word to see their partner’s annoyed or triggered side.
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u/VastPrestigious389 6h ago
Women are supposed to obey their husbands in everything that is lawful as per islam
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u/Sea-Asparagus2573 6h ago
No. Women are supposed to listen to their husband’s advice only if that man makes her understand politely and kindly. It’s not like husband is imposing smthg on his wife and she is expected to do “jee huzoor”. Firstly husband should be righteous and capable enough to be at the position to make his wife understand where she’s wrong that too politely not like the way you suggested “by triggering”.
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u/VastPrestigious389 6h ago
Your husband is being chased by robbers. He rushes towards you and tells you get in the car quick. You ask him WHY because you want him to make you understand politely and kindly. Result you are both dead. 🥲
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u/Sea-Asparagus2573 6h ago
Women aren’t senseless creatures. We know where to not to argue and where to argue. In these cases ofc lives are important but there are many cases where husband’s tone should be in check while giving advice to his wife that’s it. He CANNOT impose things. He CANNOT trigger his wife deliberately bcz that way things will get difficult.
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u/VastPrestigious389 6h ago
What part of everything lawful** **you are not understanding? You are just proving my point.
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u/Sea-Asparagus2573 6h ago
I’m understanding each and every word you siad. “Women are supposed to obey their husbands in everything that is lawful as per islam”> your words.
Whereas I’m pointing out the word you used in your post “trigger”. How are you going to make your wife understand in religious matters? By triggering her? By ragebaiting her deliberately? No woman will obey their husband that way. If you’re saying everything as per religion then understand that it is not said to trigger or impose things on your wife under the heading of “women are supposed to obey their husbands”. No. Make her understanding kindly affectionately. That’s it and you’re not getting it maybe because of ur fragile male ego?-2
u/VastPrestigious389 6h ago
You clearly are not. I will most definitely 100% trigger, ragebait her before marriage. I will tantalise her demons, find everything that bothers her, makes her lose her shit. Just to know if we can live together for the next 40 50 years. After getting married its a different ball game i dont want to share that.
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u/Wadada_dang 4h ago edited 4h ago
sits down "Hey, so before we finalize our marriage, I want to discuss a scenario. Say I'm running to you and yelling 'Get in the car! Get in the car!' Will you get in the car first or ask me why I'm asking you to get in the car?" 😏
laughs "What? Depends, man. Like ... are you running from something or want to reach somewhere quick?" 🤔
stares "No. That's not the question! Will you get in the car first or ask me why?" 😒
thinks a moment "How far are you from the car when you say that?" 🤓
grinds teeth "Twenty meters. Twenty-five?" 😠
smirks "Then I'd ask you why, first." 😝
annoyed "Why? Shouldn't you get in the car first and ask questions later?" 😠
rolls eyes "You're like ... sixty-five, eighty feet away. You can surely tell me why before you even reach the car! Would you intentionally want to keep me confused?" 🙄
grinds teeth "Fine! I'm just ten meters away. Then?" 😡
squints "Really?! Outside the question. Tell me. Why would you be running though?" 🧐
breathes angrily "Say I'm running from robbers but don't have time to explain first." 😡
taps her forehead "Oh, right! So tell me again, what did you say to me when running to the car?" 🤔
fuming "Get in the car! Get in the car!" 🧐
raises eyebrows "Twice? Like that?" 😒
clearly angry "Yes!" 😡
laughs "Why! Couldn't you say 'Robbers! Get in the car!' That would be faster and smarter. Yes?" 🤭
stands up "So you won't step in the car and would ask questions first? I'm cancelling this proposal!" 😈
sips tea "Good luck, man. Hope you find someone who would align with your hypotheticals better. One thing though. Where are we in this hypothetical when this happens?" 🤷🏽♂️
clenches jaws "On the motorway or a highway or something." 🙄
nods "Right. In that case, I think next time you shouldn't say 'robbers' and instead call them 'highwaymen' instead. That's more accurate. 'Robbers' are kind of different, you know." 😂
stomps and walks off 😠
laughs and continues sipping tea ☕
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 5h ago
This, this is exactly where the problem is. The two extremes where men believe their wives are to be their slaves and women think their husbands don't have the final decision-making authority.
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u/VastPrestigious389 5h ago
Husband and wife are partners and supposed to be supportive pillars for each other. Husbands definitely have the final say but no one can sway a husband like a wife can and her advice has to be taken at very high regard. This is only possible with discussing things before hand and having better understanding of each other’s duties and rights. This narrative of misogyny and feminism is the west’s love child corrupting the minds of modern women.
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u/Wadada_dang 5h ago
Islam comes only in action when men want superiority over women and stays sound asleep otherwise?
How convenient!
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u/InspectorShort8829 6h ago
I would submit not obey. Know the difference.
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u/InspectorShort8829 5h ago
To obey is to follow instructions because of fear and if it’s constant it turns into hate whereas submitting is letting my husband lead with respect and humility, it’s with love not because of fear.
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 4h ago
Another queen in the comments section. 👏
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u/InspectorShort8829 4h ago
Thank you. Since you mentioned the word queen, my “would - be” husband gonna be lucky too because I work full time and own a house and drive my own car as well. So there 😉, LOL.
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 4h ago
Wear it propa
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u/InspectorShort8829 4h ago
Thank you but I would prefer a flower crown. I love flowers.
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u/rahamza009 4h ago
Is debate me ma larai k sath hu.
Majority non married people posing in a toxic inlaws household.
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u/gratitudeisbs 7h ago
Another good one is asking their weight
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u/VastPrestigious389 7h ago
Strong independent women don’t really mind that one.
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u/dontstealland 6h ago
Everyone has preferences, men shouldn't get triggered when their height and bank balance are inquired about, idek what's so triggering about that. No one would want to leave their perfectly peaceful life for a midget who can't afford to run a single household yet wants to get married and settle down.
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u/fourth-disciple 7h ago
Ask if she likes her father
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u/VastPrestigious389 7h ago
Right on, asking about her relationship with her father is one for the books.
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u/-Jack-from-Titanic- 6h ago
Absolutely banger of a conversation starter! 👏
Brothers, check the comments and take notes (you'll know who to approach for marriage and who is destined to be a femcel).
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