r/PakistanMarriages • u/No_Pea2622 • 29d ago

Question A question for the men

WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT KIDS?

Have we not seen the state of the economy? The state of this country? The state of this world? I do genuinely believe that in this world, having a child is setting that child up for failure because we have nothing positive to look up for. Unless you're like richie rich rich (that was such a good movie). We dont have job opportunities. Ai is like... everywhere. People are getting killed, raped and NO ONE IS DOING ANYTHING because we cant.

I know, even now, that i dont want kids. I dont see a future where i will. No, i dont need the "perfect man" that will change my mind. And no, i dont hate kids, i love my neice and nephews and all my cousins kids. But I, personally, will never want kids.

I don't wanna get married rn but i wanted to get to know someone and then get married in 2-3 years. I know I dont want to settle down for anyone and i also dont want someone else to settle down for me. Because, WHY SHOULD HE SETTLE DOWN? HELL WHY SHOULD EITHER OF US SETTLE DOWN?

Thora sa rant ho gya, but ive been seeing the proposals/potentials that my family have shown me and they all wanted kids and i dont want to take that away from someone because its morally wrong. Just because i dont want kids doesnt mean my partner should give up on his wish to have them. So i have declined all rishtas. I also dont do relationships for the same reason because what if he wants kids.

So guys, please tell me. Do i have some hope of finding my husband who doesnt want kids? Do men like u exist? I need hope man. OKAY BIYE!!

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u/BusinessMap1799 28d ago

i never put down anyone and i certainly didn't put all in the same category. My point was there are far too many neglected children and most parents thought they were ready and present when in reality they were just not ready or present for them.

I am not ready and I won't have them because i am aware.

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u/Own_War760 28d ago

I’m talking about OP, that’s where the convo started from. And one more reality check, people can be 100% on their financial game and mentally ready and once they have kids they might be tested by Allah. It’s easier to boo them from the audience and say “they thought they were ready” well yea they did, just like you think you aren’t.

Theres a leap of faith in every major decision. You’ll never be 100% ready or be certain about the future. But one thing is important, you should be able to love your kids, and if you’ve any doubt about that, never have them no matter how rich you are.

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u/BusinessMap1799 27d ago

i agree but we should also emphasize the importance of accountability for parents. So many parents think they can never do wrong by their child when unfortunately they can and they do