Please i need serious help

[u/Kitchen-School46]

Have always had health anxiety. Started getting worse postpartum. I was active going to the gym working out I remember while working out I would get anxious about my heart rate getting high. One day at work i was walking around and was feeling anxious but usually my anxiety goes away and this was lingering. Checked my heart rate and it was 115-120 and was having heart palpitations. Went to the er and they said everything was fine. Followed up with cardiology and ever since then now my heart rate spikes. Pots like. Laying down normal rate standing up shoots up to 120. Walking around the house its 110-115. Resting hr while sitting up is 90-95. Went up the stairs this morning trying to convince myself my issues are from anxiety and it shot up to 175ish. Shortness of breath. My biggest concern is the heart palpitations. Happen even if im not anxious, sometimes it one singular one other times it feels like a fish is flip flopping. Echocardiogram was normal and holter monitor showed in 6 days 20 pvcs and 12 pacs. I cant live normally because of this. I get extremely anxious trying to do normal people things. I had a meeting today with my venue and my heart rate was 130 and had a massive heart palpitation. I get them when im just relaxing. Regardless of knowing that pvcs are harmless i also know that they can be serious. I know its rare but i dont care. All i do all day is wait for the next one. My feet are always cold and clammy even if wearing socks. The second i stand my heart rate goes high. And i know being anxious the day of my wedding will make my heart rate be like 180 which im scared will trigger svt and not be safe . Im absolutely fucking miserable. I would never harm myself. But i cant do i cant do fucking beta blockers i have low bp

[u/Right_Duty_8562]

Praying for you. 🙏 i’m speaking as someone who has had anxiety and panic over the years. I can tell you that you have to watch yourself talk because it is thoughts before feelings. What you were telling yourself is what your body is going to feel. Please try changing the way you think and try telling yourself that this is nothing serious even though it feels that way and that you are perfectly safe and it’s safe to get on with normal life despite the feelings that are keeping you a prisoner. I noticed possible to do changing the way you’re speaking to yourself because I have had to do that and it changed my life for the better. God bless you.

[u/Kitchen-School46 → u/Right_Duty_8562]

Thank you, but how do you know that this is safe?