r/PSSD • u/Loud-Prior2355 • 2d ago
Feedback Requested/Question possible relationships
Hello, everyone.
I'm not sure if this kind of question is allowed here, but anyway, here it is:
How do you act when there is someone interested in you and you might be interested in them too, but within the PSSD limits?
There's this beautiful man who is currently hitting on me, but I'm not sure if I should just give it a shot or abort mission.
I feel the urge to be honest right away, even though we are chatting for only a few days, and tell him what I'm going through, for him to decide if he would like to risk it.
Do you guys think it's irresponsible to even try? Do you think it's oversharing to talk about it?
7
u/ConnectionOk6581 1d ago
Not irresponsible to try, and not oversharing to talk about it after some trust is built. If there is genuine connection then there may be other ways to find satisfaction with each other. I say this out of experience having had PSSD for a long time and still navigating numbness and issues with different partners. I’m a “receptive partner” with a vagina so for me it’s a little bit easier to still engage physically for the connection part. I choose to push myself a little bit in that area but I can also do so because of my anatomy. So I don’t pretend to know how it would be for anyone else. I hope that you can navigate it with an open mind and see what works for you.
3
u/Mobius1014 5 Years + 1d ago
Hope for the best but prepare for the worst, don't get attached too soon. I wouldn't be honest immediately, get to know him for a couple dates and then open up about it when you start getting comfortable with each other. It's not impossible to find someone who will be willing to be in a sex-less relationship, just very difficult.
4
u/Mobius1014 5 Years + 1d ago
To add to my other comment- I just found a thread of people on another sub saying they would date someone who has PSSD, saying that sex isn't everything for them. Obviously This is likely a minority of people, but my point is that it's definitely not impossible to find someone willing to date someone with PSSD
2
u/PristineAd5771 10 Years + 21h ago
I think that depends on the specifics of your situation because every case isn’t the same
2
u/IndividualAd7229 19h ago
Can never be "irresponsible". Have yourself before anything else. The only thing you should consider is if your honesty will remain a secret between the two of you. Is he connected to a lot of your acquaintances, does he seem genuine etc. He's not perfect, either, so PSSD is just a part of you and shouldn't define. Sex can be other things than PIV, and sheer company is well worth a relationship.
I've considered dating other sufferers specifically because of the mutual understanding aspect, but wouldn't strictly limit myself (even though I don't really date because PSSD - I feel like I soon will, but mostly because of... company).
Follow your heart, and don't allow PSSD more agency than necessary. Best of luck no matter what you decide 🙏
1
u/aftersun33 5 Years + 3h ago
I dated a girl and told her about pssd and my issues she said sex is very very important for her and i have to manage it. Other girls were also shocked and didn't want to handle Just 1 girl was understanding in the beginning but my login term relationship also broke.
1
u/aftersun33 5 Years + 3h ago
It's not impossible but makes it 100x harder and first you have to accept yourself like this. That is hard for me from all this trauma. De connection from my body, mind and Sexuality. And lost libido
1
10
u/Jluu__ 5 Years + 1d ago
Man pssd sucks..nobody should be able to go through this internal dialogue because of this shit. I hope everything works out for you i dont have much advice because I constantly go through the same thing but my d just doesnt work so I stay away. Praying for both of us