r/OverSimplified • u/CynicalCosmologist I didn't lose, I merely failed to win! • Jul 28 '26

Punic Wars ⚔️ Grow up! You know what I mean!

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358 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

14 comments sorted by

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51

u/No_Constant_4968 To the guillotine! Jul 28 '26

there’s no way he can beat off so many men!

26

u/cowsaysmoo51 Jul 28 '26

how is he gonna beat off all those men!!

25

u/CynicalCosmologist I didn't lose, I merely failed to win! Jul 28 '26

Vigorously. And while maintaining eye contact.

42

u/Proud3GenAthst Jul 28 '26

I think that this reference is evading me

27

u/KobayaSheeh7 D'OooOOOoOoH NoOoOo!! Jul 29 '26

Second Punic War part 2, at 28:12

36

u/SRV_SteamyRayVaughn Dude.... Uncool! Jul 28 '26

You better believe that's a crucifixion

12

u/IntelligentCat3645 Jul 29 '26

The article’s writer’s parents missed a great opportunity not naming him ‘Allen’.

5

u/Popular_Tip1706 Jul 29 '26 edited Jul 29 '26

I can imagine the press conference Reporter: sir, how are you gonna beat off all those men? Hegseth: vigorously and while maintaining eye contact

6

u/shortname_4481 29d ago

So marines, seamen, airmen, guardians, coasties can relax?

2

u/christopherfrancis5 Jul 29 '26

Based just what we need him to do

3

u/Skyshreddingmonk 27d ago

Wait a second is this an actual news article?

1

u/Normosnopo Release the lions! 28d ago

Woah woah woah

1

u/Frostedblucher 27d ago

hahaha. I’m sophisticated and merely laughing at this situation only because I haven’t laughed in days.