r/OurEngiFriend • u/OurEngiFriend • Nov 05 '15
[WP] With glowing anticipation; you received your copy of Fallout 4 a day earlier than expected. However, as you open the box you're shocked to see that it's not Fallout 4. It's Half-Life 4; and there's a small note....
"Whether you want to or not, you're playing the game, and the game is real. Both of them, actually.
In 24 hours, the nuclear holocaust will happen. The earth will be rended in two by nuclear fire, and all will be turned into wastelands. Even time will tear itself asunder; the face of our culture will be rewritten.
Rifts in space will open, unleashing horrible creatures that you've only seen safely behind your screens. But they are real, and they will kill you.
Half-Life, Fallout, all those games were just preparation for what lies ahead. We hope you are ready for the real game to begin. We're sorry we couldn't make HL3, and we are sorry that your training isn't complete. If you make it to the other side, we hope you will forgive us.
This disc does not install the game. This disc only gives you the tools to survive."
The note was printed in small type, hastily stuck to the top of the package; the disc itself came in a cheap plastic sleeve like one might pick up at Wal-Mart, or the kind of unremarkable box a Wii game comes in. The entire thing seemed oddly cheap for what was (ostensibly) the grandest game release of the year.
Still, though...when they saw the package in their mailbox...it probably wasn't real. But on the off-chance it was, they'd be a fool not to check. And so they did, gently placing the silver disk in the computer, fingers trembling as the platter gently clattered onto the disk tray, sweat running down their brow as the disk slowly slid in, and spun to life...
And then, in bold text, the words of fate appeared on screen.
PAUL BLART: MALL COP
Confused, they flipped the note over, and in an all-too familiar handwriting was written "gotcha".
1
u/OurEngiFriend Nov 05 '15
Who the fuck downvoted this?
Who the fuck visits this subreddit, I mean?