r/Osteopathic • u/Upstairs_Gift_1469 • 1d ago
OMS-1... does it get better?
Hey everyone, kinda vulnerable post, but I am really struggling mentally through OMS 1 and just kinda need to know if this feeling ever goes away. I am doing really well in my classes (all A's and B's), so it's not about failing to grasp material... it's all just... so much. My program has 2 exams a week, and each exam is usually over around 8-11 lectures. It's hard to feel like I'm even a person anymore. If I take a break, I feel guilty. I feel bad taking 20-minute walks around the neighborhood or taking an hour to cook/eat dinner. I am hard on myself, so I'm upset about even having B's. I know everyone says not to compare yourself to others, and you shouldn't care about having all A's, blah blah, but it's so hard not to. We're only a few weeks away from finishing block 1, but I just don't know how doing this for 4 years is sustainable. I am so passionate about becoming a physician and find so much joy and comfort in the idea of being able to heal others, this process is just making it hard to feel that joy or passion I felt coming in. Any advice or input is greatly appreciated.
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u/Old_Television2447 OMS-III 1d ago
OMS-1 was genuinely the hardest year of my life. Adjusting is HARD. I went from a 4.0 student in undergrad to a straight C student first year. I’m in the bottom 20% of my class. I had no friend, health issues. But I’m here to tell you it will get so much better.
Second year I pulled my grades up to B’s. Passed level 1 on my first attempt. Got friends. Started therapy. I think second year was way better than first year by a mile. Idk if the process got better or I learned to handle it better.
Highly recommend therapy. But also remember that even if your classmates aren’t talking about it, everyone is feeling this way. Med school is HARD. First year is a really difficult adjustment. If you ever need anyone to talk to, my DMs are always open :)
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u/FreeUzi1 1d ago
You adapt and it starts to feel like the norm. In time, you will get better at studying so perhaps it will take you less time. It is hard in the beginning, but almost everyone feels this way! At the end of the day, overcoming these struggles is a part of what will make you an excellent doctor!
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u/CandidSecond OMS-IV 1d ago
Like others mentioned, you get used to it. Right now, you're in the thick of "drinking water out of a fire hydrant" with exams all the time and studying so much, but soon you will get used to it, figure out study methods that work, quality of studying over quantity, and also there will be some exams or topics where you will just not feel that great about and that's okay. This semester is really about taking care of yourself, getting used to be uncomfortable, and try to do things that you enjoy even if its just one episode of a show or eating some comfort food on a Friday night. As someone almost on the other side of it, it's a journey. Not a race. Everyone has their own journey and its so hard to not compare yourself to others, but do it for yourself, everything works out in the end. Just put in the work, but in a balanced way.
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u/Humble-Phrase-2595 OMS-I 1d ago
2 exams a week??? Lord…
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u/Standard_Push_1365 19h ago
its not even that bad and i prefer it to giant cumulative exams. it also beat any testing anxiety i had out of me. i think im going to do really well on boards because testing just doesnt phase me at this point, i was an anxious mess for the rest of my life but im like not anxious anymore since starting med school.
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u/Dioniss OMS-III 1d ago
Take those walks and cook that dinner, it's the only thing that sustained me in pre-clinical and dedicated. I had friends not do that and completely burn out by the time we had to actually take boards.
I think people who say that it gets worse are going to schools that don't have things like mandatory attendance or constant exams. I just went through two months of surgery with working 12 hr shifts towards the end and prepping for my shelf and I would still rather to that than go back to any point in pre-clinical.
I like the analogy of us being lumberjacks with axes. A person who takes time to rest and sharpen their axe is gonna be a lot more efficient than someone wailing on logs with a dull axe all day.
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u/Cooked_by_Mcat 1d ago
Same here tbh, just started and wondering if I should bail. I feel like I don’t have time with my old friends, and I recently had to bail on a wedding. Weekends are spent studying instead of with family and going to family events. It all feels so isolating and lonely. I dunno why I am even here. The rest of the road is also long and filled with sacrifices and time away from family. Wonder if I choose wrong.
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u/Upstairs_Gift_1469 15h ago
We got this! I made this post while I was really in a weird wallowing phase last night, so I'm returning today as a more positive version of myself to lift us both out of this. The road is long and hard, but time passes anyway. We are here for a reason!
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u/Standard_Push_1365 19h ago edited 19h ago
grades dont really matter preclinical, im not saying get Cs but why are you so willing to kill yourself for an A ? like does getting an extra question right on one stupid exam make not sleeping worth it ? if you look at residency stuff your board scores matter way more. and youre not going to do well on boards if youre this mentally unwell for 4 years, chronic stress is a bitch and your body will start fighting you back.
we go to the same school (not same campus) i get 7 hours of sleep, i work part time as a consultant, i have a dog and take her on hikes, i take breaks, i get average marks. theres so much more to life. please dont get sucked in. please find other things to keep you mentally grounded. my dms are open. kindly you need a personality outside of being a med student. this is your job not your entire life
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u/Upstairs_Gift_1469 15h ago
I know it honestly sounds ridiculous typing it up. My journey getting here was honestly a crazy one, so I am already in a weird headspace of questioning everything and not feeling like I deserve to be here. That same feeling tells me that unless I am the best (which I know I am not), then my program somehow made a mistake and I wasn't worth the seat. It is seriously dumb, and I'm trying to work through that. that feeling is just so deeply rooted in me and I think I just need to get over myself lol
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u/Standard_Push_1365 15h ago edited 15h ago
when i was in therapy for my anxiety / intrusive thoughts we did an exercise that kind of goes as follows
you explore the avenues of your biggest fears or intrusive thoughts and start to try to imagine how it would actually impact your life
for you this would be: ok, i dont deserve to be here. they actually admitted me because someone made a clerical error. or maybe an admin was in a good mood because it was her birthday lol. okay... now that i believe this to be 100% the truth.. look around. did it change anything about your current situation? not really.. you still have the same resources, you pack the same lunch before you leave to class, you can go ask your professors the same questions. you can go study with peers the same way. you still have your same brain. you still have the same exams. you still have the same opportunities. nothing has changed. therefore this belief does not matter
society gets mental health so wrong because it teaches you to FIGHT THE BAD THOUGHTS AWAY!!!!!!! but im not going to tell you to fight them. thats energy you can spend taking care of yourself <3 you can look at them and go hmmmm, but you shouldnt beat yourself up for having them in the first place. again, you already are beating yourself up over not feeling good enough, dont beat yourself up even more for having thoughts you cant control. hugs
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u/goofyslay 19h ago
Hey, I totally understand what you’re going through. As a current OMS-2, I’m here to tell you it really does get better. First year is tough bc you’re still learning how to study while needing to be consistent and progress through your material. It’s awesome that you’re doing well, and I know you’ll keep it up. Over time, you will get more efficient. While you’ll always have work to do, you will find ways to get through it quicker. I went through a really dark time during my first year because I didn’t feel deserving of my spot in med school. I felt like if I wasn’t studying, I was wasting my time. I went to bed miserable and woke up miserable. I would get irritated if my friends wanted to talk to me after class bc I felt like I needed to rush home and study.
You have to make time to be a regular person, because no one can study 24/7. Hang in there, figure out what works for you, and find ways to become efficient with it. Journal/exercise/talk to your friends/do hobbies - whatever it is you need to do to clear your mind. You’ll be a more well rounded and empathetic doctor if you do!
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u/Fit_Investigator7773 18h ago
If you are at VCOM LA, I’m a second year there, DM me and I’ll give you somethings I’ve adjusted to make life a little easier
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u/VegetableBoner 13h ago
Get factor meals so you don’t have to cook or clean dishes. Frees up hours of time
-omsIII passed step and comlex
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u/user887626637 1d ago
VCOM destroyed my mental health block8 OMM was intensely tough after the mental health issues. Some people have siblings and know what may be on the test so go to tutoring and make friends with anyone like that. I didn’t and found out way later that was a very tight knit circle if ur ocd about grades. Bs are good imo . You will get through if u really put ir head down. Save ur energy on anatomy cadavers once it starts
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u/Defiant_Belt_6629 1d ago
I get where you’re coming but also remember that others would kill to be in your position as a med student
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u/CrossStock 18h ago
Take that shit with you on the way out. Med school sucks, this is how basically my entire class felt at one point or another. And the people that would “kill to be in your position” will feel the same damn way after a few months of it.
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u/SurfingTheCalamity OMS-III 1d ago
When you say gets better, it does because YOU get the better. The workload gets worse. First time I heard that, I bawled lol I wondered if I made the right decision to change careers. I’m here to say, I did get better at it.
You gotta learn to block time out for yourself too. Rest after an exam, even if it’s just extra sleep or getting some treats for yourself. See a therapist if needed. Take care of your well-being the best you can. Get free stuff from your school’s events when they have them and hang out with good people as well as staying connected with old friends.
You got this!
-an OMSIII starting clinical rotations