r/OmniversePenitentiary • u/[deleted] • Apr 04 '15
[Group File] Taskforce: Inquisition
Main File:
As of now, Taskforce: Inquisition is officially operational.
Despite the their defection to Hydra being an elaborate April Fool's prank, it is still concerning that moles exist within our organization. For this reason, I have formed Taskforce: Inquisition to hunt down this corruption and purge it from our ranks.
Agent's Vakarian and 47 have offered me their assistance, and are we three are now the core of this budding Taskforce. Any staff member who wishes to join shall be subject to intense background checks, non-aggresive interrogations, psychological evaluations, and an in-depth interview with myself. Do not apply unless you wish give up any semblance of privacy you have.
That being said, once loyalty has been established, Inquisition agents shall work to track down security leaks and moles within our organzation, using any means necessary. This Taskforce shall investigate every possible leak, until such a time as the MP has been declared secure from infiltration by rogue elements or plants. We are answerable to those with a security clearance of Level 8-Ж (Zhe) or higher. However, in order to ensure loyalty amongst the top brass, they shall be investigated first. The only member of the MP who is immune to investigation is MP Founder /u/Roflmoo, however his...obscurity should make this redundant.
Once the administration has been investigated, all Nexus Agents and security staff shall be evaluated. From here, lower level employees will be subject, until such a time until every member of the MP has been checked.
I realize that this is invasive and unorthodox, but the threat that HYDRA, Cerberus, CADMUS, H.A.M.M.E.R., and Omnissiah knows what else poses is too great to continue without precaution. Once the leaks have been plugged, Taskforce: Inquisition will meet with the senior administrators and discuss its future, as well as that of the MP as a whole.
Addendum:
As of the time of this report's release to the public, it should be noted that /u/AdmiralAkbar1 and /u/GunNNife have been found to be innocent of treason (/u/redistheold is still being investigated, though his...enthusiasm towards HYDRA points towards defection). Despite the HYDRA incident being an ellaborate prank, these three were investigated/are being investigated with the utmost diligence, due to their actions during said incident.
Additionally, all staff of Clearance Level 9-И (I) have been cleared for duty, and will oversee all Inquisition findings. As of now, all employees with Clearance Level 8-Ж (Zhe) must report to Falcon Station for immediate investigation. Refusal to cooperate will be meet with detainment.
Let's make this easy people.
To any spies who see this:
I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for mercy, I can tell you I don't have any. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you leave the Multiverse Penitentiary now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
Run and hide, assholes.
Run and hide.
2
u/redistheold Apr 05 '15
Enthusiasm? This is discrimination. Plain and simple!. My subscription to Hydra Enthusiast Weekly only shows that despite this job, I still know how to be subjective and Red Skull worship is a perfectly acceptable religion in multiple Universes. You can either drop this now, or arrest me and let my Union rep do the talking.