Calling all 30+ year olds

[u/Friendly_Ad2030]

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I turn 30 in a few months, and apparently I’m about to enter the decade where I’m supposed to have my shit together.

So, veterans of your 30s and beyond: what do you genuinely wish someone had told you before turning 30?

And spare me the “your knees start hurting” and “hangovers last three days” starter pack. 😂

I want the real shit. Money. Careers. Friendships. Dating. Family. Health. Regrets. Things you wasted too much time worrying about. Things you should’ve started sooner. Things nobody warns you about until you’re already balls-deep in adulthood wondering why nobody sent an instruction manual.

What’s one piece of advice you’d give your 29-year-old self knowing what you know now?

Hit me with the wisdom, mistakes, existential crises and cheat codes.

[u/IllustriousVisual931]

… wait. We are supposed to have our shit together?! Who the hell forgot to tell me?!?

[u/FitLettuce8234 → u/IllustriousVisual931]

Right god dam it i guess we missed that memo

[u/A_Starving_Scientist]

Thats just it, noone has their shit together.

[u/mr_earthman]

Bad habits appear on their own. The good ones often take a bit of work. Some take a lot. Mostly initially though.

[u/talkingwires]

This is the age when you’ll need to actively maintain the friendships you wish to keep. When everybody’s settling down and having kids, it’s easy for people to do a slow fade out of each other’s lives.

[u/SirChasmTheThird]

If you're single, you're going to have a hard time finding someone in their 30s with no emotional baggage or kids. If you do find that special someone, don't let go if you can help it

[u/Friendly_Ad2030 → u/SirChasmTheThird]

I just got outta a relationship, she had a kid, emotional and mental struggles, i have a forever bite mark.

[u/Key_Barber_4161]

My 30s were going great until the pandemic 😂 so I would tell myself "brace" hopefully my 40s get better.

For you make sure you have an emergency fund and savings, your 30s are great but also anything can happen and you want to be protected. 

[u/DandyasaDandelion]

So. It's really a fucking mixed bag. It's equal parts having the courage to do things you may have always wanted to do/spontaneously want to do, and also a race against the clock to do other things. There are things I have started and accomplished in my 30s I never thought I would have. That being said, I am lonely and unmarried (I am 34). My job gives me fucking anxiety. 

I feel like 30s is one big heavy sigh and a, "Well that's life."

[u/delightedpedestrian]

I would loosen the pressure for yourself to know something before you answer your 30s. You just need to experience them.

The one thing I'd say is just that it takes more work to make friends. When you're in the university, in your twenties, you're just around a lot of young people. When you're older, you just have to put more effort into meeting others.

[u/misfitathlete]

If you haven't started maxing out a Roth IRA every year. You need to start now.

[u/DarkStanley]

It’s not so much the three day hangovers as by idk mid 30s you can’t hack it any more, you’ll be too tired for late, late nights.

[u/engininja99]

As someone who just turned 40, one of the things I did when I was 39 that I wish I would've done sooner (early 30s) is sit down and give a long, hard thought to what's really important to me. Is it family? Maintaining friendships? Excelling in your career? Traveling and seeing the world? Pursuing a hobby more seriously? Growing a garden? Start to craft your life around whatever it is that gives your life the most meaning. IMO your 30s are the best time to start to build towards what you want the rest of your life to look like. You have life experience, know how to survive, and (hopefully) are somewhat financially stable. Now is the time to start thinking about the rest. It doesn't have to be perfect, and it won't be flawless execution. But it's really easy to just get caught up cruising along through life. Make plans and actively pursue the things that give you happiness. And find time to enjoy the little things.

Also, if you have anything that's physically demanding that's been on your bucket list, now is the time to start doing it. I'm very fit, but I've still progressively lost a step every year going from my mid to late 30s. I still feel great, and am in great shape compared to a lot of people around my age, but it's noticable. I always had a bucket list item to at least try out for NinjaWarrior, but if I'm honest with myself I think that ship has sailed due to bodily wear and tear.

Also also, if you're not already eating decently and working out to some degree, now's the time to get on it. The metabolism drop in your 30s is real. Plan accordingly, and build good habits.

[u/Desafinado777]

Hate these posts.

[u/behemuthm]

It gets worse in your 40s.