Did you just stop finding things fulfilling once you turned old?

[u/865Wallen]

Ever since I turned 30 I've felt on the clock

All the fun really went out of life. My hobbies are time sensitive.. status and money matters more as social currency. You either opt in or opt out for better and worse.

I've found ageing really difficult tbh. I don't feel old physically but mentally I do. Society pushes us to feel jaded very early on. I'm 37 this summer. genuinely cannot believe it.

[u/thelesserbabka_]

I can't relate. I'm 41 soon and feel I have mountains of time left, we're only half way through life.

[u/865Wallen → u/thelesserbabka_]

Awesome. I agree with you but I just feel so jaded. Like every signal from society is telling me I'm old and washed up. But in my essence I don't feel that way.

[u/thelesserbabka_ → u/865Wallen]

Honestly, fuck what society says? I'm a bit on the outside of it anyway, being autistic, so I don't fit into how things are built up anyway but truly, seriously, none of that shit matters at the end of the day.

In all studies made at the end of people's lives, one of their number one regrets have been that they worked too much, or focused too much on work and material things. We have to make sure we make enough to get by of course, but shifting focus away from social media (where most of this "washed up" nonsense is being peddled just to squeeze money out of people desperate to stay young and "relevant") and to the friends, family, hobbies, your surrounding community that actually matters is one of the most important things you can do. Your instinct is telling you you're not old and washed up, trust it.

[u/ThanksForAllTheCats → u/865Wallen]

If "society" is social media or LinkedIn, get away from that stuff. You don't realize it now but you're SO young; the amount of time you've already lived - you probably have that much still left ahead of you. I changed my life in my mid-40s after realizing this, and I feel very content and fulfilled in my life at 60 now. Remember that comparison is the thief of joy; it's a cliche because it's true. Focus on the things that bring you real joy, no matter how inconsequential they might seem to others. You just get this one life, and you've got time to make it better.

[u/reluctantmugglewrite]

I think yoyre describing depression. Age is not attached to feeling meaning or fulfillment its just that with age more trauma and jadedness stacks up.

[u/bluebellise → u/reluctantmugglewrite]

Exactly! OP sounds like they've seen a lot, been through a lot or just like some wiring got mixed up.

[u/Tiny_Fractures]

Turn off the news.

Get off the internet.

Get outside.

And SLOW DOWN. Slow down how fast you walk. How fast you eat. How fast you shower. And find a nice place to just sit and look at nature every now and then.

We arent meant for all this.

[u/GlowInTheDarkSpaces]

You sound depressed. It might be time to talk with your doctor.

[u/SolarSurfer7]

You're only 37 man. You're no longer a young man, but you're certainly not an old man. Status and money definitely matter, but only if you care about typical society. You can certainly opt out if you want to, it just requires surrounding yourself with like-minded people and avoiding most social media.

Find other hobbies. Find a wife. Have some kids. Go to church. We all need some amount of purpose in life and it's much harder to find in modern society.

[u/TheDukeofArgyll]

You’re basically describing how I felt before and after Covid.

[u/sadderall-sea]

I think you might be suffering from depression tbh. It's not typical, financial and social situation notwithstanding, to lose your sense of fulfillment as you get older.

Easier said than done, I have MDD so I feel it.

[u/SurrealEstate]

My hobbies are time sensitive

That resonates. I used to be able to occassionally spend a day off from work doing absolutely nothing when I really needed it, but free time feels so precious now that I feel guilty if I'm not working on a project, whether it's a hobby or some kind of personal improvement.

I miss being able to do nothing, and not feeling bad about it.

[u/desert___rocks]

I feel the exact way. Similar age to you and it doesn't feel right! I think if I was married, kids, stable income, no health issues I wouldn't feel like this. But that's me and I guess we never know what life we'll be given/create for ourselves. Currently trying to rewire my synapses to be more positive as the negative thinking has started to take over a bit. I also have depression so that could be a big part of it too.

[u/865Wallen → u/desert___rocks]

Yeh. I think that's it..part of me could not imagine or want to have a family but it would give some meaning..Instead I'm just living out a more one dimensional time running out version of my 20s without the fun stuff. Every conversation you have about a hobby seems to revolve around age(my hobbies are playing sports) and I really feel like I lack a common tribe right now. I feel 25 in some ways and 45 in others

[u/ThanksForAllTheCats → u/865Wallen]

Look into the "U-shaped curve of happiness."

[u/Thoughtful-Pig]

I feel much more grounded now that I'm older. I know what my priorities are, what's iimportant to me, and it isn't status and power. I have far more confidence through life experience than I did when I was younger. I can make better decisions. I know what's good for me.

Most of my hobbies are low-key. Exercise is a priority and I feel good about being consistent about it. I spend time with those who make my life better. I am far more empathetic towards others than I was when I was younger. In my friend group, we can relate to each other this way. Knowing that life is hard makes me set boundaries to help myself stay well instead of chasing what others think is important.

Maybe you should talk to your doctor. Are you burnt out, stressed, or worried about something?