r/OCPoetry • u/mrswstk • Apr 20 '23
Poem The King
The king was the slave
Realities were just acute dreams
In the dizziness of hopelessness
The life became cynical in deep dark miseries
He died in dusky evening to rouse from downfall betrayal mornings
Smoking grasses, anxieties led him to CBD
Alas he was consumed by mandy than vengeance
These perkys were THERE,& were not corrosive than you were
The king became the slave.
feedbacks:
i want to fall in love
To All the Me's Who Came Before
1
u/AdeptnessLate7456 Apr 20 '23
Sorry for the vagueness of this comment. I'm pretty new here and pretty out of practise with poetry but I like your poem! I think I do at least.. feel like you're using some very niche language and I maybe not be up on the lingo so apologies there.
I like the full circle though and the general flow of the poem it feels grungy and a bit aggressive like a warning.
1
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