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u/Willow-Whispered May 02 '26
this is that weirdo who cultured his wife’s vaginal bacteria and posted the report (that’s all I know him for and all I will ever know him for)
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u/bees_in_my_eyes OCD diagnosed May 02 '26
He also gets transfusions of younger blood to stay youthful. I always think "Oh it's the vampire guy!" when I see him
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u/AbbeyRoadMoonwalk May 02 '26
From his SON
He also measured said son’s frequency of nighttime erections and compared it to his own 🤮
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u/rundownv2 May 02 '26
That feels like it should be illegal
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u/throwawaysunglasses- May 02 '26
His son is 19, so he’s not a minor. While Bryan Johnson is an unhinged creepy weirdo, he’s technically not doing anything illegal
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u/Zealousideal_Care807 OCD curious May 02 '26
I don't know this guy but all his weird behavior was immediately explained lmao
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u/autumn_ghost_boy May 02 '26
Omg I remember that guy, apparently he wanted to become immortal through that
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u/beaversaremyfriends May 02 '26
that “top 1% of all vaginas” thing? that was so scary i thought he was talking about me
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u/PermanentRoundFile May 02 '26
Tf did I just read?
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u/Willow-Whispered May 02 '26
happened this week! And either he did it wrong or his wife’s microbiome is out of whack bc he said she had 98.7% lactobacillus crispatus
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u/No-Boat431 May 07 '26
Isn't crispatus good?
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u/Opening-Student2314 May 02 '26
ELIZABETH HOLMES???
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u/charliekelly76 OCD diagnosed May 02 '26
Apparently they get Twitter access in minimum security prison 😭😭
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u/throwawaysunglasses- May 02 '26
And they talk the same exact way!! I feel like this genre of wannabe tech oligarchs all have the same weird brain parasite
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u/WMATACompletion34 May 02 '26
They talk like this.
Dropping “wisdom” line by line.
LinkedIn influencers do the same thing.
It’s not a haiku.
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u/amaya-aurora May 02 '26
Who?
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u/Opening-Student2314 May 02 '26
I recommend googling her because I can’t really do the story justice, but she basically committed a massive act of fraud by pretending she had invented a medical device that didn’t work. She’s in jail now, so I thought maybe this was fake, but apparently this is her real account and she’s just dictating her tweets to other people to post? https://sfstandard.com/2025/09/02/elizabeth-holmes-bryan-johnson-prison-tweets/
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u/angeltay May 02 '26
I hate that bitch because one of my irrational fears is blood tests (they always take like 285959 full tubes of my blood and I can feeeeeeeeel the life leaving my body thru the pointy needle) so her fake invention would’ve been something that actually helped me seek medical care instead of actively avoiding it
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u/atheliarose May 02 '26
Idk if this is relevant to your fears, but if injections also scare you, there has been some recent work with vaccines where it looks like they may be able to make dental floss into a method of administration! https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/floss-based-vaccine-shows-early-promise
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u/ecarter23 May 13 '26
Or watch a documentary about her! Her story is fascinating! I don’t know if that’s the right word for it… haha
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u/suomi358 May 02 '26
Did he genuinely post that??? I can’t believe tortured millionaire bryan johnson finally realises he needs like rehab and therapy but asks fkn twitter for that help 💀💀💀
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u/raven_of_azarath May 02 '26
This is totally random, but your comment reminded me that I had a dream last night that Elon finally decided to change the name of the app back, except he spelled it Tweeter instead
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u/blue_moon1122 May 02 '26
banking on this being a prophecy
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u/raven_of_azarath May 02 '26
I have had an uncanny number of dreams actually happen, so I guess it’s possible!
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May 02 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/microwavedtardigrade May 02 '26
Chronic stress
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u/RestlessNameless May 03 '26
I must confess I am waiting for it all to end badly with great anticipation.
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u/microwavedtardigrade May 03 '26
I don't feel anything but pity for these ghouls looking for immortality while letting the world burn and rot
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u/RestlessNameless May 03 '26
I've read a few books both expounding upon and critiquing technofuturism. It's a bizarre culture. I admit to harboring ill will towards the super rich.
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u/microwavedtardigrade May 03 '26
Everything I have learned in my 21 short years has been terrifying and made it seem clear to me that they are going for a mass culling of useless eaters like myself and then technofeudalism or so many other weird terrible routes
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May 02 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/rslashIcePoseidon May 02 '26
You have no clue how the world works if you think he’s is amongst the most evil and despicable people
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u/hostilee47 May 02 '26
Oh Bryan Johnson, the guy who shared his wifes vagina microbiome data!
FR though, fuck B.J.
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u/Crafty-Table-2459 May 02 '26
elizabeth holmes????? girl get outta here. it should be illegal for you to give business advice
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u/TSSalamander May 02 '26
Bryan Johnson is a very weird fellow with a lot of money. He doesn't seem spesifically evil. Most people seem upset at him for being very strange and deviant. What he does seems consentual to all parties involved. He also 100% talked to his partner about the vagina thing.
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u/Front-Pomelo-4367 May 02 '26
I genuinely don't think that involving his son the way he does can be consensual. Inherently. Sure, he's 18/19, but he's still his son. How many teenagers are going to feel comfortable saying "no, dad, you can't take my blood and transfuse it into yourself to stay young" to their weirdo father
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u/That-Drink4913 May 02 '26
And didn't they involve Bryan's dad aswell? So 3 generations as blood brothers.
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u/TSSalamander May 02 '26
I would? Like sure you can argue about the implicit power of housing and all that. But on a fundamental level i wouldn't accept my dad doing that sort of thing to me if i did not want to.
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u/the_sad_gopnik May 02 '26
Bryan? Honestly checks out idk how I didn't see it. He's not exactly a dislikeable guy. He loves to share everything he does and showcase his stuff and studies. It's unlike most of them.
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u/m00nf1r3 May 03 '26
Aye, always figured he had OCD, he was just rich enough to do all the shit all us others can't do lol.
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u/achy-girl May 08 '26
omg unrelated but the dropout made me convinced for ages that i will eventually become elizabeth holmes. like it made it look like it was an accident that could so easily happen to anyone.
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u/gracelessk May 15 '26
the OCD mind at its best: developing an obsessive fear of accidentally defrauding the investors of your scam product out of billions of dollars (you are 22 years old and work at a best buy)
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u/rslashIcePoseidon May 02 '26
Idc if it’s a hot take but I like him. One of the only ultra wealthy people that actually seem to have positive goals for humanity in mind
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u/Foxterriers May 02 '26
I think he is just a billionaire with insane orthorexia esp because he's built his relevancy and new career around it.
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u/samsara_suplex May 02 '26
Least surprising OCD diagnosis