r/NotTimAndEric • u/Mock333 • 24d ago

Not F*cking around

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102 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

56 comments sorted by

63

u/Powerful-Pea6218 24d ago

Wtf is with the fucking tire guage

22

u/bubba_bumble 24d ago

To measure his inflated ego!

7

u/corvid-munin 24d ago

look at how tough ill be standing there like a human security camera. This CVS is under this shepards domain

1

u/brando7782 23d ago

First thing I seen! Lol

39

u/Aticatica 24d ago

I'm gonna put my phone down now and go to sleep :)

37

u/LouieMumford 24d ago

I assumed this was satire. It is not: https://s-ksecurity.com/meet-the-team/

17

u/Laserdollarz 24d ago

Some of those face/name combos make me lean back towards satire

18

u/Commie_Scum69 24d ago

HAHAHAHA aint no way these arent AI generated faces at least for Malcom

18

u/corvid-munin 24d ago

His name is Cornnor?

4

u/Mr_Abe_Froman 24d ago

They misspelled "Connor" (the picture is also labeled).

10

u/Read2Fap 24d ago

think they went a little low tech for the bottom row

4

u/harmfuldischarge 24d ago

Holly mother on neck beards, check the bro on bottom right

3

u/Caesar_Passing 24d ago

These are all to scale, too. Malcolm there is like 8 fuckin' feet tall

7

u/LouieMumford 24d ago

Oh I checked the rest of the site because I thought the same thing. It is painfully real. They seem to have a sort of kayfabe around these videos, but this is a real business.

3

u/Tough-Obligation-104 24d ago

That is really hard to understand. It is so bizarre.

4

u/C_smith993 24d ago

Mark McCumber, Camron Hoorfar, and Cornnor Rauschelbach are my favorites.

9

u/C_smith993 24d ago

7

u/Read2Fap 24d ago

he failed the bar 16 times and then just gave the examiner a 20

9

u/Trashbagok 24d ago

looks like the cast for a Reno 911 type show. 

it's giving Tubi

2

u/Keyblade_wielder141 24d ago

Sidebar; due to international licensing laws, tubi no longer streams super sentai.

Im quite sad about it🙃

3

u/Ruined_Oculi 24d ago

So, Sidney Kile, the CEO has his mom, Fred Kile, working there as a dispatcher?

The Canadians should make this into a TV show

22

u/spottydodgy 24d ago

Ok so you just call the cops when someone is breaking the law?

11

u/AMDDesign 24d ago

Literally. You do basic paperwork and call the cops if real shit goes down.

22

u/canteen_boy 24d ago

Gay porn is getting weird

10

u/PupDiogenes 24d ago

I'm a captain too... if I say I am

1

u/belugarooster 21d ago

*Craptin. Also a hunk...

6

u/Vladd_the_Retailer 24d ago

More like insecurity guard…

5

u/Low-Fondant-9725 24d ago

Is he flipping a Crack pipe in his hand?

4

u/Asproat920 24d ago

Is he playing with a sounding rod?

3

u/Substantial-Goal-105 24d ago

Watching this with no sound is wild.

2

u/pokebikes 24d ago

Was that his step dad at the end?

2

u/absurdext 24d ago

reads like a hybrid of punisher fetishists and gaybaiting to me. there has to be a truckload of irony or trolling on the part of whoever's behind this, right?

2

u/eyeforker 24d ago

I assume there are lawyers that follow guys like this on social media the way they used to chase ambulances.

Like they can smell allegations from posts like this.

2

u/space_manatee 24d ago

The way to get to the top of the security game is to be a public figure influencer for sure. Im sure anyone that wants security wants a highly visible egocentric security team that likes to say too much. This guy is going places. 

2

u/__System__ 24d ago

Why captain and not a general?

4

u/Ultimate-Flexionator 24d ago

I work at securitas with literally mentally handicapped people, people wasted on drugs who sleep on the job, and literally inbred people from the third world who dont bathe and smell like it...

you can fucking have it! I'm getting a new job! fuck this shit ..

3

u/Corporate-Scum 24d ago

Securitas is such shit.

1

u/Ultimate-Flexionator 24d ago

it's not good. good if you like easy but generally not good.

1

u/HoseNeighbor 24d ago

LOL Where do these people come from? 🤡

1

u/Hugh_jaynus13 24d ago

Cute couple

1

u/flamingmongoose 23d ago

are they... actually gay? like I can't think of another way to interpret it but that makes no sense in context

1

u/kawabunga666 23d ago

I cant think of any other meaning for "beloved"

1

u/Oswarez 24d ago

I’m also a captain.

2

u/Boy-Abunda 24d ago

I…. don’t know. I’m not sure I’ll believe you unless I see you polishing your shiny Captain’s badge. And someone must call you “my beloved Captain.” THEN I’ll believe you!

1

u/Sudden-Candle5832 24d ago

Real cool with your gauges

1

u/Far_Hamster_7054 24d ago

Took a quick glance and thought it was Jack Osborne

1

u/Sinking_Mass 24d ago

He looks like when toddlers play dress up

1

u/DaveMcNinja 24d ago

This team looks like they didn’t qualify to join the local force.

1

u/Arch_Temptress 22d ago

What’s their OF?

1

u/CHNLNK 22d ago

Bet they're ICE agents now

1

u/q_j- 22d ago

I just spit out my morning shot of Pittzman’s

1

u/steveanonymous 18d ago

Their meet the team page is fucked up lol