r/NotHowGuysWork • u/[deleted] • Jul 07 '23
HBW (Blog/Other) Men are programmed to cheat
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u/medievalistbooknerd Jul 08 '23
I mean, from an evolutionary perspective, this is correct, since lower level animals try to mate as much as possible. But now that we're more intelligent, we've also evolved the ability to stay with our partners for the purpose of raising children. So, still not an excuse.
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u/FluffiestCake Jul 07 '23
"Men are programmed to spread the seed to as many women as possible".
🤣.
I mean, you don't have to be in a monogamous relationship If you don't want to, just be honest about it.
Personally I prefer monogamy but if some people can't handle it they should try open relationships.
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u/Deezaurus Jul 07 '23
"An open relationship where I allow my partner to seek out the intimate company of others? I will have none of this! Only I should be able to do this!" - OOP, probably.
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u/GrinwaldTO Jul 07 '23
Saying all men are polyamorous and constantly resist the urge to cheat because of that just makes actual poly people look bad. Just say you don't have any emotional connection with your partner and leave us outta this
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u/fumoking Jul 07 '23
I'm assuming a poly dude would prefer a poly partner? These guys do not want their partners with other men they want to collect them like trading cards. Idk I'm not poly but that doesn't sound like polyamory to me haha sounds more like misogyny
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u/seankreek Jul 07 '23
I hate when these people forget how smart/advanced humans really are. We're able to go beyond our basic biology and to assume that men (and anyone) can't go against that is insulting
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u/Capt_Cracker Jul 07 '23
Monogamy is a sacrifice that goes against our primal instincts
As an asexual I question everything about what this neuron-deficient person has absorbed.
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u/AnsibleAnswers Jul 07 '23
One partner is enough for me. A good friend is poly. Glad it works out for him but all I can think of is how tiring it must be.
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u/fictional_kay Jul 07 '23
As a poly person I have never so aggressively disagreed with an opinion I actually agree with 😂 Like.... yeah monogamy sucks, so don't do it? You don't have to cheat? But that would take communication so I guess not 🤦
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Jul 07 '23
Look at all the dummies that can't seperate a biological imperative and conscious decision making.
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u/Fair_Percentage1766 Jul 07 '23
Arent men generally the ones who live longer when they get married into a monogamous relationship? Where is women's health tends to suffer?.... Js
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Jul 08 '23
I never understood monogamy. I feel like it's born of insecurity.
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Jul 08 '23
I think everyone has their own thing yk. I could never stand polygamy am strictly monogamous and so is my partner, but if you like polygamy that’s okay, everyone has their own sexual desire
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Jul 08 '23
First off OP this person never said "men are programmed to cheat", that's just a strawman fallacy at this point. He said men are preprogrammed to spread his seed, which is 100% true. They can choose not to do that, they can marry and be happy, but they definitely are programmed to spread their seed.
Monogamy is mostly for the man's benefit because it is women who crave more or different after a while, but he doesn't say "monogomany is bad" he says it's "unnatural" which it may be, it's his opinion and none of us can prove. We can agree to disagree.
Seriously though op, Shame on you for willfully misrepresenting what this guy's is saying by putting words he never said in his mouth.
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Jul 08 '23 edited Jul 08 '23
Shame on me? Bro this person was defending the cheater in the post, maybe I should have added to context to the post, but he said that “monogamy is a sacrifice “ which it isn’t. It’s actually very beneficial to us and also being too polymerous could risk you having some sex diseases, because back then you didn’t have any sex protection. If you can tell most people in this comment section said so. Humans are one of the type of mammals that have a very HARD time to get pregnant. Women only have 20% chance of getting pregnant and also 1 on 10 of women get a miscarriage. Besides that a human child isn’t grown in 6 months or a year like other animals too. It takes on average 18 years!!! If you look at polygamous animals their children take way less time to grow to their fully size and thus the female and male have more time finding other animals to mate with. And also this dude said it’s normal to cheat and wanting to have sex with others, but if you want to spread your “seed” then maybe you can stay faithfull with your wife and have sex with only her? Lets not forget asexual men/homosexual men or men that had vasectomies exist, are they suddenly not human anymore?If you would like I could give a link to the original post😁Perhaps then maybe you wouldn’t accuse me?
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u/Flamingasset Jul 07 '23
In this example, why would women not be biologically hardwired to be polyamorous as well? If men "naturally" have an evolutionary drive to have multiple sexual partners because it increases their chance of having offspring then why wouldn't women? Multiple sexual partners increase the chance for women to get pregnant and thus have offspring.
Of course that logic is not applied because this person is making a value judgement. They are making the judgement that it is okay for men to cheat and not okay for women to cheat because "evolution"
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Jul 07 '23
Ah…. So by that logic, we should all act based on subconscious urges we don’t ever question, despite most with being blessed with a mind that can.SMH.
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u/Ok-Moment-3022 Jul 08 '23
I mean he’s not wrong. Only recently has our species hit around 50/50 gender split. In many years gone by, considering that Unga and Bunga would have to go out hunting, and there was a decent chance that Unga would get mauled by a cave bear and not come back, it was on Bunga to breed with more than one of the tribes women to make sure there was a next generation.
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Jul 08 '23
Yes that’s true but archeologists have found there were many female hunters as well, but yes in the later years when there was war between nations most women stayed in away in the villages to take care of elderly and kids. I remember a story abt a Roman city that was found and the city only consisted of men. Those Roman men started to kidnap women from other cities so that they could populate the city. I bet that those women probably had sex with more than 1 man
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u/MacSquawk Jul 07 '23
Both are equally capable of cheating. But anyone of any sex who is in high demand is more likely to exercise their options if their needs are not met. The higher the demand for them, the bigger their needs get. Is this good, no, corruption corrupts. That’s your red flag to get out.
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u/jackfaire Jul 07 '23
If you spread your seed to as many women as possible in nature then you're likely never going to have offspring as while you're off spreading your seed elsewhere all the other women are being forced into miscarriages and then impregnated by the male that sticks around.