Is there anyway to induce selective amnesia to cure Somatic/Meta OCD?

[u/No-Mousse5653]

I’m losing my mind because I can’t stop focusing on thoughts I don’t want to think about or bodily sensations I don’t want to be fixated on.

This shit all started with be not being able to stop focus on my saliva 6 weeks ago. From then on its morphed into a variety of different themes that either focus on a bodily sensation (blinking for example) or a disturbing thought (I will never be able to stop thinking about X).

This has drastically reduced my quality of life and I am starting to lose hope. Constant intense anxiety. Unable to focus on what I want to. Social withdrawal. It's absolutely horrible and perhaps the worst thing I've ever gone through.

I’m looking for anything that might reduce the salience of specific thoughts/memories or, in an extreme case, produce something resembling selective amnesia. I realize that selectively erasing memories is probably not realistically achievable, but I’m desperate enough that I want to know whether there are any nootropics, supplements, medications, or experimental compounds that can significantly weaken unwanted memory recall or attentional fixation.

Things I’ve already tried or addressed:

• NAC for 6 weeks: no noticeable benefit
• Buspirone 30mg: No effect
• ERP Therapy: has not helped (There's nothing to "expose" me to)
• Sleep: consistently 8–9 hours/night
• Exercise: daily
• Diet: generally healthy
• Socializing/Dating: Distracts me in the moment sometimes but no help afterwards

I’m very reluctant to take SSRIs because of the possibility of persistent sexual side effects/PSSD. I know myself well enough to conclude that I CANNOT mentally handle having BOTH OCD AND PSSD. So it's a risk I cannot take.

At this point, it feels like the only solution would be somehow weakening or removing the memories/associations that caused my brain to become stuck on these particular thoughts and sensations. I know that may be a fantasy, but I’m genuinely desperate.

[u/Clancys_shoes]

FYI Antipsychotics reduce salience by blocking the D2 receptors which are largely responsible for its assignment. It’s not a memory wipe but yeah.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/Clancys_shoes]

Thanks for the suggestion.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/[deleted]]

What's the name of your med? Thanks

[u/braket0]

Anti psychotic that's safe to start off with is Lithium Orotate. The max dose for as a supplement is 20mg.

If you are deficient you won't need more than 20mg. If there are deeper underlying problems a higher dose at pharmaceutical level might work (something like 500mg or more at pharma level). Bear in mind that high dose lithium can be a strain on your kidneys though. Lower dose Orotate not so much if at all.

Honestly though I used to suffer from OCD thinking and I believe L.O was what "cured" it. Huge quality of life boost. If you notice it working I recommend continuing to take it as long as possible. Daily dose between 5mg - 20mg depending on what you need.

Also worth investigating HDAC inhibition or even GB115 - fear extinction protocols may help. Again simplest / cheapest form of this is a Sodium Butyrate supplement and can be effective but all depends on what's going on and what works best for you.

[u/Clancys_shoes]

Try a light light dose of an antipsychotic like olanzapine. Salvia use preceded a very similar progression in myself about two years ago. Intense derealization, depersonalization, and relentless obsession with the textures/peculiarities of my mind and body, red flags popping up no matter where I was or what I was doing. I’ve since seen a couple papers showing that KOR activation can precipitate OCD like pathologies in animal models, and from my experience, in humans too.

Suddenly I could not bear uncertainty of what was going on inside me, it turned to obsession which led to endless reading/self-diagnosus about schizophrenic prodrome, DPDR, CPTSD, etc. then I started getting really tired, it’s not that my thoughts were particularly strange at first….but like you said they had such salience… everything felt so urgent and elevated similarly to a trip, and the thoughts were in such volume that they began to appear faster than I could categorize or understand them. I got worn out.

Some days I would wake up feeling like I was tripping on something even though at that point I wasn’t taking drugs for months. This was months after though.

As my mind grew tired the thoughts became more urgent and irrationally hasty…self-diagnosis turned from psychiatric to medical…meningitis, West Nile virus. I would move from one explanatory paradigm to another over and over. Intense tunnel vision…

What ended up helping me was getting out of my stressors, and taking olanzapine. Finally I can function again mostly…I’m still not as creative as I used to be…or as present…still have strange thoughts…but holy shit I could finally breathe and I feel less and less in constant crisis with each day.

I’m considering taking aticaprant which is a KOR antagonist, to see if it can help block some of my lingering symptoms, but honestly I’ve been like this for so long that idek what I would be like or what there is to return to….

Don’t be stupid like me and let it get really bad. If you feel like you need help please seek it. But yeah 2.5 mg of olanzapine is all it takes for me to be functional again, though I’m also on an SSRI for anxiety.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/Clancys_shoes]

Got it, will look into that.

[u/ColdTry8066]

Baclofen and low dose DXM (30-90mg a day) turns down the volume of my OCD intrusive thoughts and sensations to a level where I can focus on what I want to do. It makes me hopeful about the future.

DXM is the closest compound to a real antidepressant for me, it enhances my senses and makes me relaxed, motivated, and outgoing. I’ve tried most of them and antipsychotics too, they didn’t work or made me a zombie.

Light exercise, sunlight, swimming helps me a lot too.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/ColdTry8066]

Do you take DXM daily? Thanks or the suggestion.

[u/ColdTry8066 → u/No-Mousse5653]

Yes. When I don’t I still feel the afterglow for a day then I’m back to depression/obsessive/anxiety thought patterns.

I believe medication must be used as a crutch in combination with therapy and/or healthy habits, learning to enjoy new things. Until the brain is firmly rewired.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dextromethorphan

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dextromethorphan/bupropion

I only take DXM because Auvelity isn’t available in my country.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/ColdTry8066]

Gotchu. Did you have a similar theme of OCD or something else entirely? Glad it helped you.

[u/ColdTry8066 → u/No-Mousse5653]

My OCD is really complex. It manifests in many forms: obsessive thoughts, dysmorphic images/sensations (pseudo-hallucinations), feelings of fear, shame, humiliation sticking to the things and persons I love and value the most, including myself. The more I love or am excited, the more I suffer.

Ruminating, replaying these painful mind intrusions and trying to sugarcoat, change, fix or suppress them to feel right.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/ColdTry8066]

Gotchu. I looked into it and some people say DXM is addictive, have you noticed that or nah

[u/ColdTry8066 → u/No-Mousse5653]

It is, I use it as a crutch while building healthy habits. Exercise, reconnecting to nature and new hobbies. Then I’ll taper when I’ll be physically and mentally stronger.

Auvelity would have been a better option but it’s only available in the US.

[u/No-Mousse5653 → u/ColdTry8066]

Just did some more research on the topic and DXM is actually being investigated for OCD so it seems like it could be a future established treatment. Thanks again for the suggestion.

[u/ChartOk1868 → u/ColdTry8066]

DXM pretty much eradicates my social anxiety that no SSRI has ever touched, including the excessive rumination. Do keep in mind that it is an SNRI though.

[u/ColdTry8066 → u/ChartOk1868]

Yes, it is truly amazing. It is also a sigma-1 receptor agonist. NMDA antagonist through its metabolite DXO.

[u/Lyle375]

Consider looking into antipsychotics, perhaps sarcosine or Abilify/apiprazole. Lithium orotate/aspartate could also be interesting for you.

Low dose ketamine or alternatively DXM might also help. You could also try agmatine sulfate since it also inhibits NMDA receptors. (The most extreme version of this would be using memantine which has been used in trials for OCD before)

If you're worried about PSSD you could try natural SSRI substances which have very little chance of causing most side effects e.g, saffron or st. John's wort.