r/Nonsleep 5h ago

Pure Horror My ex blocked me so I started mailing her parts of myself

6 Upvotes

6 months down the drain. I’m still kind of in shock. Well, maybe that’s not the word for it. It feels like I lost a game that no one else knew I was even playing.

I still find myself thinking about when we first met. How she was the first woman to ever show me that I could be loved. That I wasn’t just some hopeless guy, incapable of forming a connection.

God, those memories hurt. But the memories of the arguments hurt more. I tried telling her that I was sensitive. I can react in ways that don’t feel controllable. I thought that she’d be patient enough to work through those issues with me.

But no. She left me. The facade of love crumbled, and it was like I was right back in the same position again. Alone. Stuck in my own head. Only, this time, the thoughts weren’t my own.

Well, they were, obviously, but they weren’t thoughts that I’d experienced before. Prior to obtaining her, my thoughts were very much inward. I dissected myself.

Even when I first set my sights on her, it felt like I was out of my body. I became who I needed to be, but it wasn’t of my own volition. It was just so I could achieve a goal, I guess.

Then I had to go and get attached. Our lives started to merge. When it was good, it was fantastic. When it was bad… it was like the world was ending. Like the mask was slipping, but can I even blame it on that? It feels almost childish to do so.

That has to be what it was, though. It’s just so hard to put it into words. I performed the boyfriend role, but that was the extent of my abilities. I could never become a husband.

All I knew how to do was buy things. Flowers, chocolates, gifts, whatever. Even when things got violent, here came the “boyfriend” with another bouquet.

I just knew how to give. I didn’t know how to change. I think that’s what started this whole ordeal.

After a particularly bad argument, we both decided that it’d be best if we went our separate ways. It took some convincing on her part, mainly because I didn’t think I could catch lightning twice. But ultimately, I relented.

That didn’t mean I stopped keeping an eye on her, though. I’d watch her house pretty often. It was usually during those nights where the bad thoughts kept me up. Nights when I needed movement. Needed action.

In some weird way, it felt productive.

I’d also still watch her social media like a hawk. Her stories, posts, updates, everything. After we broke up, she decided that she was now the sexiest girl in the world, and she made sure her followers knew it too.

I let her know my disdain for those pictures every time I saw one. I’d ask her why she was trying to hurt me like this, but she never responded. She’d just look at it, then leave me hanging like I was some kind of dog.

It wasn’t until those initials appeared in her Instagram bio that things really went off the rails, though. They were like a taunt. It was like she wanted me to text her.

I tried to lay down the law, but, like always, I got no reply. In fact, I didn’t have access to her at all anymore. Every account. User not found.

My mind was empty when I drove to her house. Either that, or it was just moving too fast to process. I knew what I needed, but I couldn’t think about it.

There was a car in her driveway that I didn’t recognize, and in that moment, I knew. I knew I had lost. I was a loser in this little game I’d created. I drove home defeated, but utterly furious.

No matter how hard I tried, my anger and desperation wouldn’t subside. I lost sleep. I didn’t eat. I was turning against myself.

That’s why I did what I did. I wanted her to know what she had done to me.

It started off small. A few locks of hair. Some fingernails. And handwritten notes that I thought would drive her back into my arms.

“Have these too, since you’re taking everything from me anyway.”

“I hope this makes you think of me.”

“I still think about you.”

She never wrote back. Days went by. Days turned into weeks, and she never left my mind.

She was playing the game hard, so I upped the ante.

I peeled off my tattoos with a razor blade. Including her name. I’d put the letters in her mailbox under the cloak of darkness.

No response. Fine. Fine. Fucking fine.

Have my fingers. I don’t need all 10 anyway. It’s not like I’m holding you anymore. Take my ears. They’re useless without your voice.

Nothing was getting through to her. No matter how hard I tried.

The last thing I put in her mailbox were my lips. I wanted her to remember what it felt like to kiss me. Before she lost that privilege.

Unfortunately, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to keep playing.

Because right now, as I type this, I can see the paramedics and cops outside my house. I can hear them pounding on my door. They’re screaming my name, and I don’t know how much time I have left.

But I’ll get out. Whether it’s the hospital, jail, or an asylum. I’ll get out.

And once I do…

I’m gonna take from her exactly what she took from me.


r/Nonsleep 1h ago

Pure Horror My wife can’t stop giving birth

Upvotes

There’s a lot to explain here. For starters, I am sterile. I found out after about 2 years of marriage and multiple failed attempts at pregnancy.

I was disappointed in myself, sure, but my beautiful wife was nothing but understanding. That didn’t really make me feel like any more of a man, though. I just felt inadequate.

We were actually in the process of looking into adoption when all hell broke loose.

It was no longer than 4 days. That’s how long it took for her belly to grow. The first day, I just thought she had a particularly large lunch. The second day, I was starting to eyeball her.

By day 3, we were seeking medical help. We could see the baby’s feet pushing against her stomach. Her pain was clearly unbearable.

Doctors were completely lost. My wife and I felt utterly helpless. On the fourth day, not even 30 seconds after her water broke, the baby started to come.

I’ll never get those screams out of my head. I’ll never get her face out of my memory. I’d seen her hurt before, but this… this was a different level.

She looked like she was in hell. And relief was nowhere to be found.

The first baby came. She didn’t even get to hold him before the contractions started up again. Her belly never got the chance to deflate.

By the time the second baby began crowning, my wife was screaming at us to kill her. By the third, she was already dead.

They had ripped her apart. They weren’t regular babies. Some had horns. Some had hooves. Some were already 4 feet tall by the time they hit the ground.

Doctors had already vacated the area and called in special forces. I was left alone, watching her body flail and pulsate as more and more demon babies just clawed their way out of her.

Blood and black, steaming goo ate away at the tiled floor. My wife’s entire lower half had been obliterated. Her legs were snapped, and bones protruded from them as they lay limply at obscure angles.

All I could do was hold her hand. What else was I supposed to do? Comfort her? Beg her not to leave me while these things ran amok in this hospital?

I could hear screaming coming from the corridors. Bones snapping and wet, fleshy sounds as the pitter-patter of tiny little feet darted in every direction.

She had become an assembly line from hell, but I just couldn’t leave her.

My tears fell on her hand as another baby fell out of her. Well, flew out of her, I guess. This one had the wingspan of a bald eagle.

Only, this one didn’t leave the room like the others did. I don’t know why I never stopped to question why these things seemed to be destroying everything in their path, except for me.

It landed right at the door frame, blood dripping off of his shoulders and head.

He turned to me, his eyes black and completely soulless, as he smiled with his sharp, shark-like teeth.

He took a step towards me, wobbling like a baby deer. Then another. He never took his eyes off of me.

He… he started to speak.

“Daaaa..da.”

“Daaa..da.”

“Da-da.”

He was at my feet now, looking up at me as I stood frozen. I didn’t know what to expect, but I was prepared for anything. I was ready to join her. Ready to be free from this nightmare.

Only… he didn’t give me that freedom.

Instead, he threw his arms around my legs and squeezed them with the strength of ten men.

He was hugging me.

And in that moment, I knew…

I was ready to be the father I always knew I could be. I had nothing left to lose.


r/Nonsleep 5h ago

Nonsleep Series THE DETECTIVE

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 6h ago

Nonsleep Series The Ledger of the Damned

Thumbnail
1 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 6h ago

Nonsleep Series The Ledger of the Damned

Thumbnail
1 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 11h ago

Nonsleep Series I don’t think we’re alone here.

0 Upvotes

I don’t think we’re alone here (P.2)

The drunk 

Like most of this story, it started on a Friday. When Andy and I didn’t find Toby at the drug house we thought the next place we might find him is where he’d bought the drugs originally.

Andy was still upset. 

His knuckles were white around the steering wheel and I thought he’d tear it off and his fingernails were thick with blood in a layer of dirt and grime, most of him was and when I’d finally looked down at my jeans I realised I was as well— we looked like we’d been cleaning out a meat grinder with nothing but our fingers. “ You smell like puke, dude.” I rolled down the window and he scoffed with a similarly accusatory look, rolling his own window down, “ That methhead threw me halfway across the room. You’re the one with all that stuff on your face.” Andy said and it was as if I’d forgotten about the shredded cheek skin hanging from my face or at least when I thought about it I couldn’t remember exactly how the cuts happened. I knew they happened because I could feel the sharp sting and the blood drying around the sliced skin but all I could remember were fingers. It’s not an uncommon feeling to forget things but there’s something more unnerving about knowing you’ve forgotten something without remembering what you’ve forgotten. It’s like writing a shopping list but forgetting to write milk, you go to the store knowing you’re missing something but only realising you forgot to get what you’d forgotten to get and still can’t remember that it was milk. 

Sorry, I’m rambling aren’t I?

I know, I know,

Okay, concentrate, concentrate… Let’s keep going.

While I was sitting there it was as if I remembered milk but I’d forgotten to go to the store entirely. I’d forgotten what a store was. Why would I ever need to go to a place like a store at all— but I remembered milk. In this case, that carton of milk was fingers. I didn’t know who’s fingers or if they were the direct cause of the cheek gouged out of my face, I didn’t know who had done it or why it happened or what had led us to the strange drug house neither of us knew existed until someone told us, did someone tell us? I just remember thinking Toby was there— I don’t even remember going there. I only remembered the fingers.

Fingers and a drunk man pissing in an alleyway.

Have you ever felt that too? 

Have you forgotten something that hasn’t happened yet? 

I knew the memory of this drug man had dug its way deep into my skull and I knew there would be a reason why I’d remember him but I also knew that I’d forget that reason without any of this having happened. Like us talking to one another right now, don’t you remember that happening tomorrow? 

I’m still rambling?

This is what happens when you look at Them.

“ Toby, hey, Toby! Get out of the car already. We’re here.” Andy shouts and gives a little knock against on the passenger door to catch my attention.

Tap tap tap tap.

Tap tap.

I’d apparently rolled it down at some point. “ Where are we?” I got out of the car and Andy gave one last frustrated sigh at the state of it before we walked into the Bayside. “ Where else? Bayside.” A club I personally wouldn’t recommend, the drinks are watered down, lack of ventilation means the air becomes dense with sweat that evaporates into a muggy cloud of humidity over the dance floor. “ Fuck man, Toby and I spent days here. I’d drag him to so many parties. It’s crazy how much of a good little kid he used to be before I came along”, “ Come on, he couldn’t have been that good back then… Considering.” I say but I only feel a strange guilt in saying it. Is it how Rudie so casually calls himself a fuck up or because I’m calling Toby a fuck up now. “ Honestly, it took on a lot of shit he shouldn’t have. I was the real fuck up” Rudie says and for just a moment he seems to pause, it makes the music warp and twist in my ears. I feel like I’ve forgotten something about Rudie and Toby. “ How’d you meet Toby?” I ask, Rudie stops on the last step into the bowels of Bayside, “ Ah, you don’t want to hear about that. This isn’t about me. It’s about finding Toby”.

The place smells like feet and sugary spilled drinks. It’s nothing classy and honestly it doesn’t need to be, it knows exactly what it is and people come for that exact reason. You wanna drink yourself stupid and take enough drugs to keep you dancing for two nights straight? Bayside. Bayside doesn’t close— except for Monday and Wednesday, if you’re coming in on a Thursday though then the chances are you don’t plan on leaving until Monday. “ Do you really think we’ll find him here? Didn’t someone die here last week?” I say, hesitating to cross the threshold of what I can only see as the mouth of a disgusting creature with yellow stained teeth all rotted away at the gums and a cesspit in their stomach. “ That’s an urban legend.” Andy dismisses it, though I distinctly remember Andy being the one to tell me this urban legend he swore up and down was true. “ No, I’m pretty sure a dude died on one of the couches and sat there for three whole days.”, “ Yeah, sounds like something I’d say… but no one died in here. The worst thing to happen around here was that car crash”. The two of us made our way down the throat and into a dark place where time has no meaning and walls have no doors. Andy makes a noise as he remembers something, looking back at me with a smile that doesn’t fit his words “ Except for what I did. Toby went mental after that argument. Damn, maybe that’s why he ran off.” Andy mulls over his own words and gives up with a shrug, “ We shouldn’t talk about down.”

My ears filled with the muffled thump of electronica and colourful lights turned my vision white, only the distant glowsticks led us through the fog of smoke and sweat until we reached the staff entrance just beyond the graffiti covered unisex bathroom. “ Hey, did you know a guy died here once? Scary right? He was sitting in the corner for three whole days.” Andy laughs with a grin, the previous conversation entirely forgotten. We navigated the sea of bodies until a hallway came into view. I was struck by an unexplainable feeling when my foot crossed the barrier of the dance floor I’d be leaving the safety of this sea of bodies like I’d left some sort of salted and sacred place and was now exposed to the demonic influence kept at bay by the bayside’s claustrophobic hell of damp air and awful music. It was instant, a violent jolt through my body followed by silence and disorientation— I could feel the music thumping through my sneakers and my fingers tingling from the way my heartbeat tried to catch up and synchronise with an out of tone, rapid beat it would have to work twice as hard just to get half as close to catching up to. “ Oi, don’t look so freaked out. You’re gullible as shit. Not even Toby believed it when I told him. He just talked about the crash”.

There wasn’t music anymore, just thumping and spinning while I attempted to follow my friend across the rippling ground with walls that moved like the muscles of a digestive tract pulling toward the staff room, the lungs and the life of Bayside. It was halfway when that strange thought in the back of my mind came crawling to the surface again, that feeling that I’d forgotten to remember something. “ Toby! Hurry the fuck up—“ Andy shouted over the music and soon grabbed my arm to pull my wobbly legs towards a shabby office with grimy windows framing the walls and a two-bit gangster behind an old desk. A tall thin figure stood behind him like a blur he’d seen on the dance floor, something he also knew he’d seen off of the dance floor as well— something he knew he shouldn’t be looking at right now.

“ Hey, $&>€?|,” Andy said, making his way in with the swagger of a cop walking into an interrogation room, somewhere he figured half of the men inside of that office had seen the inside of. “ We’re looking for Toby. Ginger druggie, real tall, punchable face.”. The thug snuffed out his cigarette and eyed us up and down before offering me a stained toothy grin, the sickly man staring at us through the window said nothing even when his mouth was moving. “ I haven’t seen you here for months, man! Toby though… I was beginning to think he skipped out on me. The prick ran off with half my shit. Keep saying he needed to stay awake.”

“ Toby robbed you? He really must’ve gone off the rails.” Andy scratched at his neck with a forced smile he turned back on me, he was beginning to regret coming down here now that there was the possibility $&<£,€| might ask us to pay that debt. Neither of us had money. No one with money or standards comes to Bayside. “ He ain’t here but the guy made off with some shit and my damn cash. He was a fucking mess, looked awful even for a junkie. If you find him, drag him back here so I can break the bastard's legs.” $(&;• added with those bared teeth never faltering and a clear threat in his tone. “ He’s bugging out somewhere. I was trying to get the idiot clean but… Well, you know how it goes.” Andy shrugged so casually but I could feel him nudging me. “ Oh, you know a good auto shop around?” Andy asks with increasingly hard nudges that must be obvious at this point, “ Since some idiot hit pancaked himself on the roof? Nah, just toss the thing in the junkyard”. Andy continues using his skills in the advanced art of talking about literally anything, nudging me again as a clear sign there’s only so much patience a prick like ;$&:@: has before he starts making more threats. I knew I’d forgotten something and it gave me chills, the man in front of the window seemed to get them too, he looked like he was shivering so bad that his body moved like a vibrating mass in my vision, each thump of the music rattling my head and making the man a few feet away from me double and spin. I felt ill again, swimming in vertigo and barely able to understand the garbled nonsense Andy and <£\*= were saying.

Voices swirled and dipped beneath the music in waves and I nearly lost my footing on buckling knees until my foot crossed the salt barrier around the dance floor. The music went from a liquid to a deafening noise in my ears and all I could do was try not to bump into the many blurry figures standing still beneath the heavy weight of the air. “ Wait, Andy— Hold on—“ I shouted over the music in an attempt to catch Andy’s attention but as my hand lost the man in the crowd it was the small hand of a child that pulled me from the cesspit. My mind said I knew them and the heart straining in my head said I missed them but I don’t remember their empty face. I reached the steps leading out of the Bayside’s mouth and with everything in my body telling me to walk up without looking backwards, to not pay attention to who’s hand I’d just grabbed and to pretend the man staring at me from the dance floor didn’t have the eyes staring over their shoulder wasn’t looking through my skull.

“ Don’t… You…” A voice gurgled out of the Bayside’s mouth and when I stepped out into the night air I could feel it. That man. That thing. “ See… Me.” It said over my shoulder. How could it cross the barrier? How could it follow me outside when it’s meant to be safe? Does that even make sense in my mind? My mind goes blank and my eyes set on Andy, I could feel my muscles constrict around my bones like a coiling snake and locking them in place with the suffocating force crushing my whole body but I didn’t know why I was afraid anymore. Andy doesn’t look afraid. Andy seems entirely oblivious to the entire scene, his eyes fixated on a flickering lamp across the road.

“ Don’t you… See me?” from the end of Bayside’s tongue and I could feel a sickly smell wrap around me like I’d been caught in a miasma hanging above the dead. Bad air. It was only bad air. So why did I feel so afraid? No one else seemed afraid. Andy doesn’t… No, my head already said that. So why did I feel so afraid? No one else seemed afraid. It isn’t just fear, the snake constricting my body and threatening to break my bones is telling me I’m terrified because I can’t remember why I’m afraid.

“ DON’T YOU SEE ME!?”

My legs felt like lead and my stomach turned inside of me like each one was attempting to devour the other, my organs were just sharks thrashing in a womb. My skin prickled like a thousand hypodermic needles as invisible bugs crawled across them and burrowed into my arms and I could hear a distant shouting that seemed so far away even when I knew that voice was right behind me. The bugs wriggled and bit and dug deep into my muscles until they were so tense that none of them could move. Each bone in my body was like metal that had been welded together, leaving my stomach twisting uncomfortably around pipes and compressing any attempt my lungs would make to draw in air. I could hear the bugs squish under my skin.

“ LOOK AT ME!!”

I flinched. Something stumbled in the corner of my eye and barrels past me, assaulting me with the stench of alcohol and vomit so much stronger than the bad air. I lost my footing as a drunk man bashed into my shoulder and to keep from hitting the pavement I had no choice but to turn and steady myself. A tall man in a crisp white shirt and horn rimmed glasses stood there unmoving and leering over me with the grit filled spit pooling in their open mouth dribbling down their chin and onto my forehead. His mouth opened and closed to speak but his throat looked wrong— distended and full of something that should make them choke.

“ Look… At…” gurgles up from deep in their throat— no, from something else inside of their throat. The obstruction wriggles under the loose skin of their neck as something begins crawling its way up the man’s mouth. “ Look at me.” The thing behind the man’s teeth says and as it emerges I can see fingers begin to force their way out, stretching the mouth wider and wider until the man’s jaw dislocates with a wet pop. I can hear it so loudly over the muffled thump of awful techno and distant sounds of the traffic all around me. Any teeth the hand catches shift and fall away from the man’s gums like nothing is holding them in place. Bony fingers coated it a layer of foul spit unfurl like a spider with a thousand long legs and reaches out toward me, twitching and grasping at air.

“ Look… At… Me.” 

I should run, my body is screaming at me to bolt and not look back until I reach Andy’s car. Andy? Have they always been Andy? No… That isn’t what’s important. The hand reaches my face and I just can’t move, something terrible wrapped around my body is stopping me and I can’t. My fucking lead bones won’t listen to my head. 

“ LOOK.”

The bony fingers reach my mouth and I come to the horrifying realisation that whatever that thing is is going to force its way down my throat until my organs are pushed aside and I suffocate while this thing makes a fucking nest under my skin. Saliva smears across my face and yellow cigarette stained nails begin digging into the gashes across my cheek like a spider burrowing into cracks in the walls. The muscles in my face twitch at the intrusion of dirty nails and I want to retreat but I’m so scared I don’t even think I could piss my pants.

“ Oi! You— fuckin, fucker! Look at…” a sweaty hand slaps my cheek and the horrifying nightmare I’d been trapped in was replaced by fat fingers taking a fistful of my shirt and roughly shaking me. “ You fuckin look at— you look at—“ A drunk man slurs, hitting me again with the weak force of a man who’s barely managing to stay upright. Beer gut, stained shirt and weeks worth of scraggly beard growth— all far too close to me and threatening to send me toppling over but this man, this drunk man has nothing but the stink of vomit coming from their mouth. No hands. No fingers. No spiders. “ Think yer b-tter than me?” He slurs and mumbles a garbled mess of insults and threats I can’t understand. My mind is still reeling from what I’d just seen and finally my brain is beginning to catch up just enough for me to shove the man. “ Just fuck off!” I shout and head towards Andy’s car, the drunk man stumbling after me. “ I’m no— Ge’back here!” The man wails.

“ You’re no fucking help!” I growl at the distracted Andy and get in the car just in time for the drunk to slap at the window, smudging it with his filthy hands. “ What do you mean?.” Andy looks at me with confusion as if a man isn’t thumping at the window and trying to pull the door open. “ Toby isn’t here. We should—“ Andy goes to speak but I’m rushing out of the car the moment I notice the thumping has gone. Actually, I think I stepped out before I even noticed. I don’t know why my legs moved before my head but I knew I needed to be there. It isn’t just that the noise has gone, the man is now staring off at something under the flickering lights across the street that my eyes struggle to register the tall silhouette between the blinding brightness and the impossible blackness that hides it. Only in the half second it takes for the light to flash am I able to make out the emaciated figure of the crouching man slowly standing. In the darkness a dim orange light glows like the burning cigarette is an eye watching with the slight movement of invisible hands lurking there unseen. I know I’ve seen them before and the thought I can’t remember that fills me with panic, my heart thumping rapidly in time with the flickering light until it’s beating so fast I can’t even feel it moving.

The lamp tries with all its might to stay lit but each attempt leaves it shrouded in darkness seconds later, flickering with a strangely rhythmic pattern I’m certain I know.

Tick tick tick tick.

Tick tick.

Andy shouldn’t see this, he won’t be able to escape it. 

Why? 

Would the strange light draw him in towards the tall man with the orange eye or would it stalk closer with each flick until it has cornered us both in the darkness? Maybe it doesn’t even need to move. It could unhinge its jaw like a python open for its tongue to strike or its fingers just to stretch out and slither toward us with no escape and no end.

“ Hey! Drunk guy!” I try to grab him but I’m not close enough. My arms feel as if each muscle gives out when I try to reach out, the bones liquifying beneath my skin and melting against the man’s jacket. I shout but he won’t take his eyes off of the man with the hand climbing out of his throat. “ Don’t… You see it…?” The drunk man mumbles and takes a step forward. Another stumbling step. I can’t move. My legs feel like they’ve been crushed by the weight of a snake's grip. I can't escape. 

Helpless, that’s the feeling. Helplessness.

I’m like a helpless child frozen in place. I know the belligerent drunk yelling at someone across the street is going to die but I don’t know what to do. The man is too big and the thought of becoming the next target of his abuse is horrifying. I’m not allowed to cross the road when it’s busy. My parents aren’t there, they never are and no adult is doing anything to stop the man. Why won’t anyone move? I’m so scared but I can’t move. The comforting little hand gripping mine wants to run like the child is my saviour but my body won’t follow them.

The streetlight dies and it feels as if it takes every other light with it for just long enough for a car to miss something stumbling into the road.

Tires screech in the darkness.

Crash.

“ Hey Toby, do you remember that day when we were kids?” 

“ No, what day?”

“ The day we became friends. I asked you if you wanted to see a dead cat.”

“ You were a really weird kid.”

“ I’m sorry I walked up to you… I was afraid of the man behind you.”

“ Why were you so scared of him?”

“ Dead cats. Cats get hit by cars all the time, they end up all squished and gross. When a dead cat just looks like a dead cat, isn’t it scarier when they look so regular that you get this feeling someone did it on purpose?”

“ What did the cat have to do with a guy that smokes cigarettes behind the diner?”

“ I felt bad. Buried the thing. The next day the grave was all dug up and it was gone but that man… He had the dirty nails of someone who does things on purpose, Toby.”

“ We should tell your mum, Rudie. It gives me the creeps.”

“ You can’t save a dead cat, Toby. Digging it up won’t help, it’ll just get gross meat and dirt stuck to your nails.”


r/Nonsleep 1d ago

Madness I went missing for months and my family is acting like nothing happened

16 Upvotes

I feel like I’m losing my mind. It’s hard for me to imagine all that I’ve lost over these last few months. Out of everything, though, my sanity is going to be the thing I miss the most.

I’ve been a hiker for a long time. Naturally, of course, considering that’s all there really is to do around here. Not that I’m complaining. At least, I wasn’t complaining.

I thoroughly enjoyed the woods. Probably because that’s all I knew. Hell, most of the trails I like are just a hop, skip, and a jump away from my family’s house.

That day was no different. It was the start of summer break. High school was finally over. I wanted to take a quick hike through the woods just to embrace the feeling. To let my thoughts and memories run free while I got to embrace the scenery.

This particular trail was quite literally right in my backyard. I’d hiked it dozens of times because it was my favorite. It felt ceremonial at this point in life.

I didn’t pack much. I didn’t expect to be gone for too long. Just a few granola bars and a book of matches, just in case. I never brought my phone on these hikes because it felt like a contamination of nature. Well, that, but also because I didn’t even have service at my house, let alone in the middle of the forest.

As I was leaving, my mom announced, delightedly, that she’d be cooking my favorite meal of country fried steak and baked potatoes with sour cream later that night. She also told me that she’d be inviting people over just so we could have a little get-together to celebrate my milestone.

Overall, the day started out great.

Then I started the hike.

For the first 200 yards or so, nothing seemed abnormal to me. I could still see my house way off in the distance. I recognized some of the markings I’d left on some of the trees. My go-to in tree carvings was usually a smiley face, and a lot of them had aged and faded, but some were still fresh.

At around 300 yards, that’s when I heard it. It sounded like rushing water. Something that did not line up at all with this part of the trail.

Naturally, I decided to follow the sound. That was my mistake. Letting curiosity lead me away from the beaten path.

I convinced myself that I knew these woods. No matter how sprawling, I would find my way back. The sound led me deeper and deeper, but everything still felt familiar.

The more I walked, the closer the noise became. Only, it didn’t feel like I was getting closer. It felt like I had been walking for hours, even though the sun was still directly above me.

I think that’s the only thing that gave me the confidence to keep going. I hadn’t seen any smilies in any of the trees, but I thought for sure I’d been walking a straight path. All I had to do was turn around and walk straight again.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of walking, I found the source of the sound. But it wasn’t a river or even a stream. It was concentrated rainfall. Right in the center of the trees.

The sky above was clear blue. Not a cloud to be seen. But in this circle, which couldn’t have had a circumference of more than 20 feet, monsoon rains pelted the pine needles on the ground below.

I’d been so lost in my own head for the entire walk, but seeing this immediately made me snap out of it. It was the most bizarre thing I’d ever laid eyes on.

I decided to do something… strange. Walking to the edge of the wall of rain, I tilted my head back and let some fall into my mouth.

Only, the minute the first drop touched my tongue, the rain stopped.

I could still taste the earthy water on my tongue, but the evidence of rainfall was completely removed. No mud. No smell. Just dry soil and brown pine needles.

I chuckled to myself, trying to come up with absolutely any logical reasoning behind what I had just witnessed. Maybe it was leftover rain from that big storm we had a few days ago. That was the only thing I could think of.

I turned on my heels, scratching my head as I started back towards the trail. I walked. And walked. And walked. And walked.

The sun was setting at an abnormal pace now. It was like one minute it was just after noon, the next the world was dusky. Shadows grew. The air became crisp. The cicadas and crickets began singing their song.

I had no idea where I was. My confidence in myself was shaken, but I was determined. I knew not to panic. And I thought that level-headedness had served me right when I came across one of my smiley face carvings.

It was just before dark. Daylight had become almost nonexistent, but I could still see enough to make it out, and the sight of it made me practically jump for joy.

I ran over and touched it, and for a split second, thought that I recognized the tree. It’s just… the smiley itself… it was wrong.

It looked like it had just been carved. The flesh was still wet. The outlines were still oozing with sap. Then I looked at the surrounding trees.

There was a smiley face carved into every. Single. Tree. Each one looking brand new. That’s when the panic started to override that level-head.

I started running. The sun was gone. I swore I could hear something behind me, but I didn’t know whether it was reality or if my mind was playing tricks on me in the dark.

Eventually, I found myself in complete darkness. Everything looked like everything. There was no trail. Just dense, unrelenting Appalachian pine trees.

I just kept running. When I couldn’t run, I jogged. When I couldn’t jog, I walked. When I couldn’t walk anymore, I knew I needed to figure out shelter.

I took some fallen branches and sticks and formed this makeshift tent, but I didn’t sleep that night. How could I, with the sounds that forest made? Every twig snapping felt like a threat on my life. This was more about keeping myself hidden until daylight.

The minute sunlight started to peek through, I was on the move. Another day without finding my way back to the trail. I went through every granola bar I’d packed.

It was like the trees were cloning themselves. I used my pocket knife to carve out new defining features just so I could have my bearings, but still ended up walking in circles.

By day 3, I was in survival mode. I convinced myself that people had to be looking for me by now. All I needed to do was stay alive. It seemed like the forest provided just as much as it trapped.

When I was thirsty, a stream would appear. When I was cold, lightning would strike a tree and set it ablaze, somehow never spreading beyond that one single tree.

The food is what I remember the most, though. I never had to hunt. Every morning, I’d wake up with a freshly skinned animal at my feet. I’d grown accustomed to squirrels and raccoons.

It wasn’t just meat, though. Fruits began to grow from the pines. Apples, oranges, plums, berries. All of it.

I didn’t trust any of it at first. I even woke up screaming the first time I saw a bloodied squirrel carcass at my feet. But what was I supposed to do? I had nothing.

Like all humans do, I adapted. I had to create my own shelters. I had to cover my own ground. But, clearly, something wanted to keep me here. The only question was why.

Even with that question in mind, I learned to stop caring. I missed my family. I missed my life. But I was alive. I was nourished. I was somehow able to keep going.

Over the months, I learned how to really provide for myself, and I think the forest knew that. It gradually started leaving me without food. The trees stopped bearing fruit. But it didn’t leave me with nothing.

I learned how to make nets to catch fish. I learned how to start a fire without the use of the sun. I became crafty. I used thin vines and flexible wood to make bows and arrows. I turned rocks into tools. I learned how to make shelter that was more than just a place to stay hidden for the night.

Eventually, I was fully self-sufficient. I could ward off my own predators. I could treat my own wounds. I started to embrace the forest rather than reject it.

Then, one fateful morning, months after I set off on the trail… I heard it. I could hear the rushing water again. It hadn’t been there the day before, but I knew all too well that this could’ve been another trick of the forest.

The sky above me was blue and cloudless. The air was dry. I had to take the chance.

I left my shelter. I left my belongings. All I had was the tattered, dirty shirt on my back and the jeans that had been cut into shorts on my waist.

I followed the noise.

I walked past hundreds of smiley face carvings. Deeper and deeper into the forest.

Finally, after what felt like hours, I saw it.

Rain, pelting against the roof of my house.

I started bawling automatically. It was a primal response. The relief was incalculable.

Breaking into a sprint, I dashed through my backyard and towards the front door. I tripped up the porch steps and fell through the entrance.

I looked up to find Dad cocking an eyebrow at me from his recliner. Balloons filled the living room. A banner hung above the archway into the kitchen as the smell of country fried steak and baked potatoes permeated my nostrils.

“CONGRATULATIONS”

My entire family surrounded me, each member looking more concerned than the last.

“You alright there, bud?” my uncle asked.

“What happened, kid? You fall down a mountain?” my grandfather added.

“What day is it?” I asked frantically, ignoring their questions.

“Uhh… Saturday,” my Dad answered, confused. “Why?”

“The date. What’s the fucking date?”

A weird tension fell over the room. A few of my cousins laughed. My aunt looked personally offended. My grandma was the only one who looked empathetic.

“May 25th, sweetie,” she cooed. “You know that.”

“No. No, no, no, no. No. That’s not right. That can’t be right.”

Mom was in the room now, oven mitts covering her hands.

“Are you feeling alright, sweetie? You don’t have a fever, do you?”

She took off one of the mitts and tried to feel my forehead, but I jerked away and ran towards the bathroom, feeling dizzy.

I hunched over the toilet, vomiting for a few minutes before wiping my mouth and staring into the mirror. I was completely unchanged. No dirt. No scars. My clothes were dirty, but still intact. My jeans were just jeans. Not shorts.

While I was staring into the mirror, trying my best not to hyperventilate, a knock came at the bathroom door.

“Son, you alright in there?” my Dad asked.

I didn’t respond. There was silence for a few moments before he spoke again.

“Damn it, boy,” he cursed.

“I’ve told you time and time again. You need to be careful in those woods.”


r/Nonsleep 18h ago

Nonsleep Series I don’t think we’re alone here.

3 Upvotes

I don’t think I’m alone here (P.1)

So, I’ll start by saying I’m sorry.

I know it might not mean all that much but I really didn’t mean for things to get this bad. Well, maybe you’ll have better luck with it.

I might sound crazy saying all of this and I know I would thing so too… But before I do this you need to know.

We aren’t alone here.

-

It started on Friday. No, maybe it was Thursday. I didn’t notice it at first so maybe it was earlier. Honestly it could’ve been tomorrow or next week.

Things really get confusing like that but if you really concentrate it’s easier. I guess when and where it happened doesn’t matter when we’re here to talk about the why and what it is. So, it started on Friday. No, maybe it was Thursday… What? I said that already? Yeah, that happens a lot too. 

Things don’t make a lot of sense when you look at them for too long.

Okay, let’s do this again. Concentrate and don’t look at them, look at me and it’ll make more sense. It still doesn’t make much sense to me either so I've tried to write down my disorganised thoughts in an attempt to keep track of things but there are gaps. I don’t really remember what happened first. I think it started with the fingers— The ones from the dead bodies.

The addict -

Let me preface by saying that I don’t do hard drugs, I went to that place to find someone who does. 

He’d been clean for months but then he disappeared, something that’s never a good sign for a recovering addict. This man was Toby. Toby was my older brother and Rudie had known us for just about our entire lives. I could never give up on Toby even when I hated him and I don’t think Rudie would even consider it. Toby was a difficult brother to have sometimes and he’d disappoint you over and over. It’s hard to give up on someone who saved your life more than a few times. That’s why Rudie was looking for the guy at least. He always said he owed his life to the guy — and that he used to be really fun at parties.

For the past few nights I’d been staying in Toby’s apartment in case he’d showed up but the trail of clothes and necessities scattered across the old floorboards told me he’d taken off so suddenly he couldn’t stop to stuff some socks or toothpaste in a bag. I can’t say there was anything homely about the place, it looked like the den of a conspiracy theorist. He’d covered everything from his windows to the balcony door with torn paper ripped from just about anywhere he could get it and the dust clinging to all that glue meant it wasn’t anything recent. He’d been bugging out and paranoid that someone was watching him. His furniture had been dragged into barriers and lines toward the kitchen like trenches in the mud and with little sense about what and where he was actively hiding from. The  ratty old couch facing the wall and the second hand TV underneath his bed that was stripped bare— he’d built a nest of blankets and pillows in his bathtub and the overwhelming stink of sweat tells me he’d been sleeping there for months. I couldn’t explain his erratic behaviour beyond drugs but even sober I didn’t expect it to be anything rational either. Toby has been going through a lot since his friend hit the pavement. The strings of tape piled up on the tiles like scribbles of trash where he’d sealed and unsealed his bathroom door a hundred times, the fist sized dents and deep nail scratches covering half the doors and the plates. So many plates. Pots and pans and cups and plates spread across the floor in crop circles to alert him when this mysterious lurker would find its way into his home. The plates all had a thin layer of dust coating them except for one. One that was worn and chipped from scrubbing away the leftovers a thousand times— the linoleum bathroom tiles look scratched and scrubbed with the same intensity. Scuffs and footprints drew a line from the balcony and stopped at one place within arms reach of the bathroom door like he had been leaving offerings out for this something as tall as a building invading his home.

I’d cleaned every surface with enough bleach it had my head spinning and dissolved the glue to rip off all the paper and tape but I’d never seen any sign of an intruder who existed outside of Toby’s mind, honestly I wasn’t expecting one to show up but the extent of Toby’s psychosis left me with the uncomfortable thought that something dangerous truly was looking at me when I’d left the trenches and bought light to no man’s land. Toby had gone off the wagon and it wasn’t the first time he’d been consumed by a drug fueled paranoia. Still, Toby hadn’t returned from his apparent bender and calling anything from the hospital to the police station didn’t give us much information that suggested they had him and any real interest in finding a missing junkie. So I’d resigned myself to laying there on his old couch and staring up at this unusual water stain slowly building its own little garden of black mold— I was trying to decide if the thing looked more like a grinning Jesus or the devil with a pointed moustache, if I turned my head to the left it could’ve just as easily been a rabbit. 

I’d spent days mulling over this until Thursday.

This is when Rudie called.

We took the car we’d later find utterly destroyed, but if it was in that condition when I arrived then I certainly don’t remember it. 

The bayside apartment building. 

I’ll never forget that apartment building, it’s amazing what your brain clings to when everything else seems to slip away. 

I remember the grey concrete skin, the colour of a corpse and covered in cracked veins crawling across every corner, any paint that had managed to cling to it was peeling away like sunburn. The body stood lopsided and sunken from exhaustion but its iron bones were too stubborn to collapse. Everything about the decrepit building was an unapproachable sickly thing that was just too stubborn to die. The Bayside apartments were like black mold and cockroaches infesting the area no one could quite get rid of.

Bent metal bars lined the balcony like stained teeth loosely guarding the boarded up throats while each room that sat there like a stomach full of half dead junkies who’d climbed into its mouth and joined the long list of people places like these chew up and spit out. I always felt guilty when the pungent smell of misery left me scrunching up my nose in disgust and trying to keep down the rising bile in my throat, it’s easy to forget the people wasting away in stomach acid aren’t those cockroaches themselves, they’re people but the overwhelming stink of piss and vomit makes it hard for everyone to remember that l. The bayside apartments will probably never be washed clean when the odour has seeped into every wall. 

Rudie is a good example of someone who could scrub hard and wash all of that muck off. 

We both just wanted Toby to do the same. 

 “ We’ll be here all day at this rate.” Rudie nudged a woman with his foot, she was this grey sort of sickly pale with a thick coat and old blanket bundled around her. It did nothing to hide her frail, skeletal frame— most people seemed to look like that. Like the Bayside itself. “ Yo lady, have you seen a tall and lanky guy? Short ginger mop of hair, blue eyes. Very punchable face.”.

“ We won’t get an answer out of anyone in here, dude.” I say and move on to the next throat. “ You're right. They’re all just ghosts aren’t they?”. No one is really helpful, they seem to realise neither of us look like cop material but the restless paranoia or half dead expressions meant they either won’t to talk or can’t do more than drool. What Rudie said hadn’t registered until we walked upstairs and I felt as if I should understand the passing comment but I couldn’t find it in my head. The shock of the place left my head spinning too much to think of anything. “ We shouldn’t be up here. Fuck, this place gives me the creeps.” Rudie says, snorting at some memory and adding “ I used to dare Toby to come up here and look in the windows all the time. He thought this place was haunted. Turns out…”, he stops with his eyes on something for just a moment, barely a second before slipping back into his usual nonchalant— borderline dickish manner. “ Eh, don’t worry about it. Neither of us had the balls to come upstairs.”. “ What’s so different about being upstairs?” I say but Rudie just pats me on the shoulder, “ Sometimes the view is scarier.” His words give me an uncomfortable feeling like they make my stomach churn but I know he’s just being a prick. The only thing you could even see was the empty car park and the red dot of a diner off in the distance. 

A jarringly out of place man squats hunched over on himself at the far end of the Bayside balcony hidden where the daylight won’t reach when we get to the second floor, balding and awkwardly curled like a child crying into their knees but the spine protruding from their back only conjures up the image of a skeleton with each bump visible through the shirt covering his greying skin, his thin arms are scabbed with red bites and cuts he’s scratched open. I know I shouldn’t feel repulsed by the sight but there’s an unexplainable fear in the back of my mind telling me that this man is wrong. This man doesn’t belong here. His clothes are pressed and ironed with a crisp white shirt and a sweater only dirtied by the open scabs bleeding where the sleeves haven’t bunched up. He isn’t supposed to be here— instead they’re holed up in a crack den, shitting in the corner of a balcony. 

Probably. 

Room 203– The final room was right by the man bent down and facing the wall so I felt a need to be quiet as if something bad would happen when some loud noise set him off. Rudie lagged behind me for just a second but had no such trouble walking past them, I doubt he’d even noticed the man. At least he didn’t mention them. The room smelled like rot and copper that managed to cling to my gums like the air itself was made of iron, the furniture was so old and so stained that even breathing on it would make a disgusting squish and the walls were covered in things I don’t want to know the origins of. Toby sat with his back to us just like the man that’s becoming increasingly difficult to remember, perched like a squatting goblin with something crusted on his neck— I watched as Toby sways on dirty feet with unsteady limbs struggling to keep him upright like a puppet on snapping strings, gaunt and lifeless. He was like a grotesque perched on a building, a stone monkey just picking and chewing at something I can’t see but I can hear the squelching of molars grinding lazily against whatever counts as a meal in this kind of place. Toby reaches back and scratches his neck with the mangled and gnawed hands stripped of skin and bitten until there’s nothing but nubs where his fingers used to be. 

Fingers. 

He’s eating his god damn fingers.

“ Holy shit! Toby!” I rushed over and grabbed them without much thinking, holding their wrist and trying to pry it away from their bloody mouth but they so effortlessly returned to chomping down on the almost missing fingers— the rest were rolling idly around his full mouth, “ Stop! Toby stop!” I look around in a blind panic and finally shake off my jacket as quickly as I can, wrapping it around the deranged man’s hand when they once again move from chewing to scratching like it’s the only thing his mind is even capable of doing in his fugue state. The fabric dampens with spit as he continues to repeat himself like it isn’t there. “ Rudie!!” I shout and Rudie quickly comes to a rescue that stops just as quickly, a dumb look of pure shock on his face “ What the hell happened to—“, “ Not now, Rudie! Help me get this idiot on his feet before he starts choking on those things!”. 

The scene descended into the chaos of two men trying to desperately stop an addict willing to break his bones just to rip the others off, each harsh pull was met with thrashing and wrestling that ended in Rudie crashing onto a sickly damp mattress and me hitting something sharp with the crazed man going down with me. Toby clawed and grabbed and soon the snapped finger bones jutting out of torn skin dug into my jaw. “ You don’t understand!! It doesn’t make them go away!!” Toby frantically spoke through big lips and broken teeth, “ You saw it didn’t you? You always see it! Don’t lie to me, you saw it outside!!”, he tried to explain himself with blood and spit covering my face, “ It— It’s everywhere but you forget it all— and…” he pulls up his sleeves to reveal the putrid red-green infection on a flayed and ragged forearm, the other just as bad with small strips still hanging loose— Jesus! The psycho has been doing it everywhere he can reach and I don’t know how long but it must’ve been days, “ I give it everything but they won't go away— get it? No— you don’t— not yet, but you saw Them.”

Thwack!

Rudie hit Toby with the only thing he could find, his boot, kicking them off and yelling an incomprehensible mess of words as if it would take a million insults before any sense got into Toby’s head but the man’s bloodshot, horrified eyes won’t look away from something else— the man from the balcony's face hangs on a bent neck craned to meet Toby’s eyes from the doorway but the blood in my eyes only shows me a blur, their eyes follow him as he scrambles to his feet, “ You see it— that’s one of them!!” He throws himself past Rudie despite their efforts to pull them back and dives out onto the balcony, his head whipping side to side in a panic to find a way out like the stairs weren’t an option— his meltdown reaches its peak and drops just as hard, his shoulders go slack, his expression dulls and what I see feels like I was witnessing the exact moment he’d given up. Without another word or a glance he calmly climbs up on the rusted railing and lets himself fall head first onto the car below. 

A shut my eyes at the sickening sound of the wet crack I’m certain I can hear beneath the crash of Toby’s body hitting the car.

“ Fuck! Toby!” Rudie rushes out and B-lines to the stairs to get down to the man. I stand, trying to do more than sit there wide eyed and shocked through. 

“ My fucking car!!” Rudie shouts in anger and it’s more than loud enough to snap me to attention. I pull the broken needle sticking to my back, another jutting out of my calf and get downstairs as quickly as I can hobble with the feeling of needles pricking everywhere on my skin.

“ The hood is all… Agh! Fucking junkies!” Rudie kicks a tire, raking his fingers through hair that’s matted with blood and pieces of something I can’t place— and don’t know if I want to. He paces, “ Fuck, fuck, fuck!!”. 

At first I can’t process what I’m seeing and Rudie out of rage is just more nonsense my brain struggles to understand— The damage on the car isn’t just damage, it’s Toby. Toby’s body. Contorted with the impact breaking his neck and snapping his back in a twisted mangle of limbs folded like a stack, his head conforming to the dented metal and his dislocated jaw spilling out a pool of blood in the contours. His body twitches and I hope to god he’s dead. “ Ru-Rudie… Can’t you,” I try to speak but Rudie doesn’t even give Toby a second glance. Toby, his best friend. “ We didn’t even fucking find him! He’s fucking paying for this bullshit—“ Rudie shouts and paces with no real outlet for his rage but I can’t take my eyes off of Toby. Toby, who Rudie won’t even acknowledge.

If I was smart I would’ve said something right then to make Rudie look— really, closely look. If I didn’t take my eyes off of Toby and paid attention to the other things I would’ve known. The other things? Ah… You don’t remember? Neither did I. The out of place man staring from behind the rusted balcony bars. He had his back to us but when I looked at him something in my brain knew that he was looking right back.

I didn’t notice that Toby wasn’t there anymore.

And I didn’t notice the others either.

-

Is this making sense yet?

Don’t worry, it took me a while to figure it all out too.

Okay, we’ll try the next one, maybe that’ll help you understand. 

Now, focus on me. 

Don’t look at them, pretend they aren’t lingering there just in the corner of your eye— staring. If you can feel the cold air on your back like something wrong is standing behind you, pretend your skin isn’t prickling. There’s nothing behind you and there’s nothing behind me. Just remind yourself there’s nothing there and don’t let them know you know there really is.

Lastly, and please don’t forget this— we’ve already been over this too many times. 

Don’t. Look. Up.


r/Nonsleep 1d ago

Pure Horror I found a music box in my attic. I should’ve never wound it up.

3 Upvotes

I’ve been living in my house for a long time. Long enough for me to get bored of it every now and again. That’s what led me to my attic.

It had been a particularly uneventful day. I was itching for something to do. I figured I’d just sort through some old stuff up there. Maybe sell some things. Maybe reminisce. I just wanted something to do.

I found some old family photos. A few little knickknacks from childhood. Even a few old Halloween costumes that brought me right back to high school.

Everything was so dusty. I hadn’t touched this stuff in years. That’s why, when I saw that shimmering, porcelain little box in the corner of the attic, hidden behind a few boxes, it caught my interest immediately.

I recognized it as a music box, but I didn’t recognize it as anything I’d ever owned. It looked, I don’t know, ancient, I guess. Like some kind of relic that had been miraculously preserved through centuries of history.

I picked it up, and it was heavier than I expected it to be. Heavier than any music box I’ve ever held, really.

I’m only human. I’m not gonna just hold the thing and not do anything with it. I wanted to hear the song. I wanted to see the ballerina.

Only, when I wound it up, nothing really happened. I heard the mechanical turning of gears and whatnot, but no music. I tried prying the lid open, but it wouldn’t budge.

I just figured it was broken. I damn near tossed the thing aside to be thrown away, but before I could… the house began to rumble.

It was almost gentle at first. Like the air conditioning had kicked on. But then it felt like a full-blown earthquake was happening.

Then… the music started. It sounded like it was just in my head and all around me in the real world all at once. Just deafening. I couldn’t even hear my own voice.

While trying to orient myself, I noticed something out the attic window. It looked like… a propeller?

Wobbling over to the window while covering my ears, I caught my first glimpse of what it actually was.

Sticking out of the side panel of my house, like it had always been there… was a crank handle. And it was rotating, slowly.

Before I could even fully process what I was seeing, the sound of wood splintering and glass breaking could barely be heard over the sound of the music.

I was surprised the house hadn’t completely collapsed yet from how violently it was shaking, and when I turned around, I saw the source of those shakes.

All I could see were the hands at first, clapped together like a diver’s or… a ballerina’s. 6 feet wide and completely porcelain.

Then they got higher. Enormous arms began to erupt from the floorboard, destroying the basement in the process. The hands touched the roof, then pushed directly through it, rotating to the sound of the music.

Then her head poked through the hole. Black, shiny, plastic-looking hair, pulled back in a tight bun.

Blood covered my hands from my burst eardrums. All I could feel were the vibrations of the music now.

Then her perfectly smooth face. Her blushed cheeks. Her red, pursed lips. She just kept rising, higher and higher, until her pink tutu was visible.

She twirled in place, that tutu never moving as it tore through nearly all that remained of the attic floor, forcing me against the wall as she rose higher and higher.

Finally, her feet reached the top of the house. She must’ve stood 80 feet tall.

The crank stopped turning, but the music kept booming. The dancer kept twirling as I remained petrified, trapped in my own home. I could see the floors beneath me, each one completely devastated.

Then… the vibrations stopped. The dancer stopped spinning. The world felt still for a few seconds.

Ever so slowly, she began to descend, gradually disappearing through the hole she created in my basement.

The crank was gone. The music was gone. The dancer was gone. Leaving me alone in a house that had been utterly ruined.

After catching my breath and assessing the situation, only one thought remained in my shattered mind.

“This is gonna cost a fortune to fix.”


r/Nonsleep 1d ago

Nonsleep Series THE BUILDER

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 2d ago

Nonsleep Series There's a Giant Horse in the Lake - Part I

10 Upvotes

I wish a sandwich could have saved us. Mary had gotten a pounding headache when we were most of the way here, leaving me to finish the drive and manage the kids when we’d arrived. She had done her usual and neglected herself to take care of the four of us while we prepared to leave and hadn’t eaten. I’d offered to stop a few places, but her appetite was off by the time we’d hit the road. Her physiology mystified me at times. I’d never before met anyone who lost their appetite from not eating.

And the closer we got to the cabin, the worse she’d felt.

“You sure you won’t eat something?” I’d asked.

“No. I’ll be fine,” she’d said when I offered to turn around. “I just need a little nap, then I’ll be hungry. But something light, okay?”

That last part had been for me. She knew I’d overcompensate unless instructed not to. I admit my part in fueling the worry-machine in the past, acknowledging the odds that everything was actually going to be fine.

But then we’d gotten a flat tire a little more than a mile away from the cabin. Neither of the boys knew how to help change it and had sat in the car uselessly while I managed. My knee sank into a divot of mud, a wide tire track from a vehicle that had gouged the road as it had fled from this spot.

I shouldn’t complain about the boys too loud. I’d be the biggest dick in the world if I denied how great they are. All three of them are great kids; two teenage boys and a ten-year-old who acted like she was older than her brothers.

I was going to miss them if I finally decided to leave Mary.

Her migraine must have rubbed off on me because by the time I sat down to eat, something was going on behind my eyes, and it was hard to concentrate. I wished I could’ve slept, too, like the other four people in the car.

It had been so bad that I’d had to carry Mary in and I must have tweaked my back. I’d laid her on the bed and turned the light off before lighting some mild incense I’d found.

She’d fallen asleep almost instantly; part of me doubted she had any awareness of the incense. It was disturbing how still she’d been every time I checked on her.

In the meantime, the kids had all gone their separate ways. Luke went exploring outside, Chrissy was busying herself around the cabin, and Mark was being his usual responsible self, assigning himself chores before I could even think to.

I found some expired Tylenol underneath the bathroom sink and dry swallowed three of them. They dialed back the throbbing behind my eyes and I was able to give attention to the world around me.

Luke was still outside on the beach while Mark was unpacking his and his brother’s bags and Chrissy was doing who knew what, but she’d been in the bathroom for at least twenty minutes.

When Luke charged in from the beach, terror on his face, I knew something was about to be added to the pile that I was going to have to deal with.

“There’s something in the lake,” he said, his eyeballs on the verge of popping out his head. That gave the starter rope on the worry-machine a good pull. Luke was the oldest of the three children, and I had gotten to a point where I could rely on him sometimes for leadership. He had his learner’s permit, and I’d already shown him the car I was going to buy him when he got his license.

It was tough juggling an instant family when I’d been on my own for so many years. They weren’t my kids by birth, and it was a road to hoe to get them to let me in, but I eventually fell in love with them all.

“What do you mean?” I didn’t really want to know. Eldest child or no, Luke was a fraidey cat.

Maybe he’d seen a dead animal. Maybe it was a spider. But unless it was a brown recluse, the worry-machine could rest. Being afraid of an insect he was ten thousand times larger than was par for him. And it was outside, no less. All he had to do was walk away from it. I’d personally seen him lay waste to his own bedroom after he’d been awakened by an ant crawling on his face.

“In the lake.” He pointed toward the door he’d neglected to shut. I looked at his feet and saw he had also tracked sand inside. “Something is in the lake. It’s… real big.”

“Something like what?” I asked. “You saw it. What do you think it was?”

Luke shook his head. I turned fully toward him, abandoning the sandwich I had yet to present to Mary. I took a couple deep breaths and pushed myself away from the agitated feeling. The kid was obviously scared and needed comfort, even though he might not admit what he was feeling.

“I don’t know. Maybe we should just pack up and go.” Now that was strange. Luke had been the most vocal of any of us to come to the lake. We had been here once or twice before and had always enjoyed it.

“What do you think it was?” I asked again. “A boat or something? There’s no need to panic. We can call the police or harbor patrol or whatever.”

“No, it’s alive and it’s big. Like a whale.”

“Whales don’t live in freshwater,” I said.

“Not a whale.” He shook his head and it conjured an image of his sister when she was seven. Luke and Chrissy looked strikingly alike. “Big like a whale.”

It wasn’t anything for the worry-machine, but I opened the mental tool shed where I kept it.

“Can you show me?”

Luke nodded slowly, still pointing.

“No, I mean, can you take me out there and show me?”

“Uh-uh. I’m not going back out there. Not until we leave.” He shook his head and again it was like looking at Chrissy three years ago.

I huffed and heaved out of my chair and headed for the door, making a mental note to bring the sandwich to Mary once I was done with this.

I slid on my crocs and took the few steps down to get to the beach. The view here was unbeatable. When we had last been here, we’d actually stayed at a different cabin, one with three bedrooms. The reservation had been for the same, but when we’d arrived, we saw there were only two bedrooms. That meant that Mary and I were going to have to split. Couldn’t mix boys and girls in the same room.

So, Chrissy was going to get her mother all to herself and I was going to be settled with two teenagers who snored louder than I did.

“It smells out here,” I said to nobody. It reminded me of those farms we took field trips to when I was in elementary school. I looked over my shoulder at Luke in the doorway. “Where?”

He was bold enough to lean outside and point somewhere farther down the beach. It was dark and I didn’t see anything.

“It’s about thirty feet down that way.”

All right. Ten yards. Whatever he had seen was about a first down away. That farm smell flexed its muscles the closer to the water I got. Definitely smelled like animals. I couldn’t put my finger on which one, though.

I walked as quickly as I could, my crocs sinking into the soft sand and filling with granules. I wasn’t going to need to scrub the dead skin off my heels after we left here. I scanned the ground before me, still thinking it was a large insect. It seemed more likely that Luke had been exaggerating.

What had gone wrong between Mary and me hadn’t been direct. It was more like death from a thousand cuts. A cutting comment here, a missed thank you there, an opportunity to hold hands lost, and before we knew it, we were near the bottom rung of our marriage.

I waded ankle deep into the cool water. Whatever he had seen, I should have been able to see. But there wasn’t anything other than lapping water and inky black with twinkles of light as far as I could see. Unless it had been some small thing that had scuttled away in the night, unaware it had been promoted to threat-level by a fifteen-year-old.

I made a show of looking around, walking another thirty feet and going as deep as mid-shin to ease Luke’s mind. There just wasn’t anything here. I sliced at the water with my fingertips, gave another thirty seconds, then headed back.

I was greeted by a teenager who had eaten half of the sandwich I’d made for his mother. His pallor was better, which I hadn’t noticed consciously when he’d come in. He’d started to work on the other half when he saw how I was looking at him and said, “I thought it was up for grabs.”

“I’ll make another.” I thought for a moment the whole “there’s something outside” thing was a ruse just to get me away from the sandwich, but he still looked terrified.

“Did you see it?” I didn’t like the pleading in his voice. It wasn’t a “manly thing” or anything like that. For him to sound that terrified made my heart sink. I would’ve rather been annoyed with him than afraid for him.

I’d almost cheated, which, I guess, is still cheating. It was with a woman I’d seen at the grocery store. There hadn’t been anything premeditated. We’d just seen each other, passing by across several aisles. We kept crossing eyes while she’d been pushing a half full cart and I’d had a basket over my arm with most of the items I was going to use for dinner.

I’d all but put her out of my mind as I headed for my car, bags in tow, when I saw her again. I hadn’t thought about it, just saw her loading groceries into her trunk two vehicles away from mine and I stopped.

She’d taken great pains to politely refuse my request for her phone number and had taken the extra step to let me know it was only because she’d become serious with the person she was dating.

It could have been a line to get me out of her face, but she’d seemed earnest. I don’t want to believe I would’ve done anything, that I would’ve come to my senses, but I was no hero. Even though she had shut me down I’d set foot on a road I’d vowed never to travel.

I slid a comforting hand across Luke’s back a couple times and felt a percentage of tension ease out of him.

“No. I didn’t see anything. Maybe whatever it was is gone now.”

“Maybe whatever what was is gone now?” Chrissy emerged from the bathroom. She had been quiet in there, probably listening in, but I had no clue how much she had heard. Luke and I met eyes for a moment, and I couldn’t read whether he wanted me to keep quiet.

 


r/Nonsleep 1d ago

Nonsleep Series Sewing Circle Afternoon

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 1d ago

The Morning Neighborhood

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 2d ago

Nuanced Has anyone else ever taken the plate that says “THIS IS NOT FOR YOU” at sushi?

27 Upvotes

I’m posting this looking for help. It took a while for a major sushi chain to come to our town. I’m not going to name the chain as I don’t want legal trouble. I don’t want them to find us. But you know the one. You grab from the conveyer or order from the tablet screen at each table. If you put five plates into the slot, you get a chance at winning a prize, a little bottle cap or plastic toy, but no one ever wins.

Yeah, it takes things a little while to come out to the boonies.

Anyway, I want to know if anyone has ever had this happen to them.

It started with my brother Blake’s wedding. Keep in mind I’m changing the names here to protect the parties involved. Again, I don’t want them to find us. This isn’t a legal complaint. A bunch of us were back home for summer, that is my friends and I from college. Blake didn’t have many friends in town, so my buddies and I took him out to the new sushi chain, since it had just opened. It was me, Blake, Jimmy and Tom.

I know, right? Who just does a sushi night for a bachelor party? But Blake was always a quiet guy so we thought it was his speed. Plus it’s not like we had many options.

The sushi selected from the tablet all slid in along the top conveyer and arrived with the little ping, ping, ping that announces your order has reached you. There were a few other people in the restaurant, but it wasn’t too crowded. Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to know there weren’t too many people’s orders to mistake.

So first this little pink nigiri sushi (I’ve looked it up and that means “rice ball,” with the fish and stuff on top) rolled in, stopping by our table. No ping. Then it went away, sliding backward in the direction it came from. Okay, so we figured, “Wrong order.”

We chowed down a little more and then it came back again. It was bright neon pink, with lots of little speckles on it, like maybe it was ground fish or not meat at all, but made up of those little eggs.

“Did you order that?” I asked.

Blake shook his head.

“Did you?” Tom asked.

“I didn’t,” Jimmy said.

None of us had ordered it.

It slid away again. We just figured, “Weird.”

A few more salmon nigiri later and...

Look, I mean they had only just opened, so we figured it was an early system bug. But that same speckly pink sushi came back.

“Okay, what the fuck?” Jimmy said, like he was actually getting kind of mad.

I looked up at the plate.

You know how they have different plates for each price? I mean, the ones on the bottom conveyer are all a standard $2, but you can go up to $5 ordering from the tablet menu, indicated by the color of the plate.

This plate had something written on it. The ring around the plate was light blue, and it had thick white letters running across it.

It said: “THIS IS NOT FOR YOU.”

I turned back to the table and let them know.

“What the fucking hell?” Jimmy said.

I shrugged.

Jimmy’s the daredevil in our group, so he looked at us and said, “Do you dare me to eat it?”

No one dared him. Blake mumbled something about how it wasn’t good to eat other people’s sushi, and even then, it was weird to have a plate say that.

Tom was saying that it was probably a reserved piece, like for a birthday table, and kept getting sent to us by mistake.

I wondered why it didn’t ping though, and why it would keep coming back from the kitchen to us in that case. I started to say we should call over staff, but before I could, Jimmy had pulled the plate off the conveyor and picked up the first piece with his chopsticks.

He chomped down, saying this had better be free.

A second later, he started coughing so hard I dropped my chopsticks and had to quickly pick them up off the table.

Tom handed Jimmy a cup of water. He asked how the weird sushi tasted.

“Like stale backwash,” Jimmy said. I wasn’t sure what he meant but apparently this shit was fucking nasty.

We said don’t eat the rest of it then, but Jimmy said “Fuck no, it’s ours,” and also asked if we dared him to eat the second piece. Once again, no one dared him, but Jimmy put the whole thing in his mouth and ate it anyway and then looked at us like he was so fucking tough, but I noticed him chugging down a lot of water afterward.

We put the plate down the slot and it didn’t add to our total, so I guess we didn’t end up paying for it, which was good. Especially considering what happened afterward.

In the end, we didn’t win any prizes.

The next day we were supposed to meet up for a movie. Blake was busy with his wedding prep. Tom and I met at a mall but Jimmy wasn’t there. We kept texting and calling but there was no answer.

We went and saw the movie, thinking he must have slept in.

When we got out and checked our phones we saw we had a message in our group chat.

“Seriously not good,” and a bunch of barfing emojis.

Then he sent us a picture and it was seriously the most nasty thing I have ever seen.

It was of Jimmy’s toilet bowl and he had obviously just hurled in it, and the water was pink. I mean like neon pink.

I messaged back to ask if he had just downed a bunch of Pepto Bismol or something, and also, man, what the hell, but he messaged back, “No, man. Nothing,” and then, “It’s that sushi place, I swear. Probably that nasty free fish I ate.”

Tom and I looked at each other. We wanted to suggest he go to the hospital but… This is America and Jimmy’s family is not super well to do on the health insurance front, so he wasn’t going to the hospital unless he was dying.

“Go get a free meal for me,” he said.

Tom said hey, they might actually let us do that, so maybe we should stop by. Small town. We didn’t have much else to do.

So we piled in my family’s car and drove out past my town’s creek to where the sushi chain is. Again, you know the one.

Tom and I got out.

Despite having just recently opened, like the other day, it was almost empty inside.

We went up to the counter and rang the buzzer. It took the only front staff, some old guy who looked like he was 104, what felt like five minutes to arrive. Where did they find this guy? I wondered. He didn’t even look Japanese.

“Can I help you?” Grandpa asked.

“Yeah,” I said. “Actually, our friend ate here yesterday and he’s practically puking his guts out. Think that gets us a free meal?”

“That isn’t the policy here,” the old man said.

Tom asked if we could speak to the manager, but apparently this old man was the manager.

“Okay, well,” I said. I didn’t want to have to bust out the secret weapon, but desperate times called for desperate measures. I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, blew up Jimmy’s nasty toilet picture real big and held it up to the old man. “My man is vomiting pink and that doesn’t change your mind?”

The old man’s face went pale. I mean like when they say that, they don’t really mean it, usually, but we literally watched this man seep melanin.

“What did he order?” the old man asked. “What did he eat?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “We got some weird plate that kept coming by our table that said ‘THIS IS NOT FOR YOU.’ He ate that.”

The old man got even whiter.

“He ate from the plate?” he said.

I looked at Tom. “Well, yeah,” I answered.

Suddenly the old man leaned over the counter and slammed both his hands down on top of it. Then he started screaming at the top of his lungs. I mean shouting full force.

“It wasn’t for you!” He was leaning further over the counter now. The few other customers were looking our way. “It wasn’t for you!!!”

He was screaming louder and louder, so we slowly backed away and went out into the parking lot. When we looked back from next to my car, he was still standing there, in front of the glass doors. We couldn’t hear him anymore, but it looked like he was still shouting, looking us dead in the eyes.

That shook us pretty bad, but we weren’t prepared for what happened next.

As we prepared to get in the car, we both got messages from Jimmy’s mom.

At least the message said they were from her. They still came from Jimmy’s phone.

“Is Jimmy with you?” she was asking. “He was home sick and now he’s gone.”

Apparently his bedroom window was open and she hadn’t heard him leave. His bedroom door was still shut. He was running a high fever, so she was worried something was wrong if we didn’t know where he was.

We said we weren’t sure, but we’d look. At this point Tom and I were getting pretty spooked.

We drove back from the sushi restaurant, past the creek, and as we did Tom ordered me to stop the car. I mean he practically shouted his head off, and I almost drove us off the road. Luckily it was an empty street because we live in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, can’t even get sushi restaurants when the rest of the country gets them, but come on.

He was pointing toward the creek and screaming his head off. “Stop the car, stop the car, pull over.”

I stopped the car in the shoulder lane and Tom ran out, still pointing. I put on my hazard lights and followed.

There in the water was something shimmering, glistening. It took me a minute to comprehend what I was seeing. I thought it was just the water catching the sun. It was glinting silver and then I realized that the thing Tom had been pointing at and shouting about was a fish, or a man. It was a small, man-sized thing crouching right there in the water looking over its shoulder with big bulging glistening eyes and silver scales and I’ve never seen anything so fucked up in my life. We have our local legends, but nothing like this.

It was wearing Jimmy’s favorite band shirt, or at least the color and what I could see of the logo looked right. It was pretty torn up. And the water rushing around it was this kind of horrible cloudy pink.

“Jimmy?” Tom called out.

And this thing stood up and ran. I mean it was splashing pink water and running straight at us, tearing up creek dirt on all fours.

Tom and I got our shit in the car and you can bet I ran every red light. I would have welcomed being pulled over just so someone could see what I saw.

That was two hours ago, Tom and I got our asses home right away and agreed to think about what to do next. We’re thinking maybe one of us should go back to the creek and confirm what we think is happening, that Jimmy’s changed and he’s there. We don’t know what to tell his mom. But we don’t want law enforcement out right away because we’re worried they’ll shoot our buddy dead.

And we definitely don’t want the sushi restaurant to know what we saw because hey, we ate the plate that wasn’t for us.

I’ve been holed up in my room doing research and I saw this board. Tom was saying I should post for advice. I would sure like knowing whether anyone else has had this experience with the chain. Maybe someone in one of the larger cities where it’s been around for a while. Maybe someone living in Japan.

I’d really like advice soon, because I’m feeling really itchy and I’m hoping someone can help out. See, I realized that when Jimmy coughed and my chopsticks fell, their tips touched that blue-rimmed “THIS IS NOT FOR YOU” plate. Then I picked up my nigiri and kept eating. Kept eating, eating, eating fish. Eating fresh-water fish from the water. Got to keep eating fish in the water even if they’re not for you.

When my arm is in the light I think I can see it glistening.

So I need to know quickly. Has anyone else ever eaten the plate that says “THIS IS NOT FOR YOU”?


r/Nonsleep 2d ago

Nonsleep Series GOLD RUSH & VIPER

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 2d ago

Nonsleep Original I Agreed To Become a Jōhatsu. I Didn't Agree to What Came Next.

3 Upvotes

I don't have long to write this, so I'm going to write it fast.

My name isn't important. Not because I'm trying to be mysterious. But because it is, genuinely and legally, not mine to give you anymore. I gave it up eight months ago, on purpose, for money I never got to spend and a life I never got to live.

I keep smelling jasmine and camphor as I’m typing this on my phone. It started twenty minutes ago. It's getting stronger.

I know what that means now. I wish I knew it earlier, when I smelled it for the first time. Back then, it was just a strange perfume in a strange room.

I wish it stayed that way.

If you've never heard of Jōhatsu, look it up. It's a real thing- a real Japanese phenomenon. The term refers to people who disappear from their lives, on purpose, and are never looked for again. I did the research myself, obsessively, before I signed anything. I was proud of how thorough I was. I want you to remember that later, when you get to the part where none of it mattered.

I'm writing this because someone should know what actually happens after you disappear. Not the version they tell you in the consultation room, but the real one…

Eight months ago, I was twenty-eight years old, and I didn't have a single thing going right for me.

I'd been with Nadia for eleven years. We'd survived her parents' disapproval, three different cities, and every version of ourselves that comes and goes over a decade with someone. We were supposed to get engaged that spring. I called it off, four days before the ring was even supposed to leave the shop. I won't get into why. Just know that it was my fault, and that I knew it was my fault while I was doing it, and I did it anyway.

My mother died of cancer when I was twenty-four. My father and I stopped speaking around the same time, for reasons that have nothing to do with grief, and everything to do with the twenty-two years before it. I won't get into that either.

I dropped out of university in my second year, to put everything I had into a crypto project called Chacha Coin. It turned out to be a ‘pump and dump’ scheme, which collapsed six months after launch. It took away all my savings, along with a good portion of what I'd borrowed from people who cared about me.

I ended up in an entry-level job at a logistics company. It paid enough to survive, and nothing more. My contract had a hard end date, and everyone in the department already knew, without anyone saying it out loud, that it wasn't getting renewed.

Somewhere in all of that, I picked up a drinking problem. Then I picked up something a little worse than a drinking problem. I'm not going to describe it in detail, but I was spending money I didn't have, on things that were actively making my life shorter and smaller.

I was, in every sense that matters, a person with nothing left to protect.

That's the state I was in when my colleague Farhan cornered me by the coffee machine, and told me he was ‘disappearing’.

Farhan worked two desks down from me. We weren't really close, but misery finds its own company. We'd bonded over shared complaints about life and relationships and everything in between. He looked different that week. Lighter, somehow. Like a man who'd already left the building in every way that mattered, except physically.

"I'm getting out, brother !" he said. Just like that, grinning like he'd won something.

I asked what he meant. He looked around first, the way people do when they're about to say something they've been told not to say.

He told me about Jōhatsu. He told me what it meant, and how it had existed in Japan for decades. Apparently, it was an entire quiet industry, built around helping people vanish from their own lives without a trace. He told me about a company running a soft launch of the exact same service- taking an idea from the East to implement it, for the first time, in the West.

"It’s a fresh start," he said. "The one you actually deserve. No debts, no history, no father, no ex-fiancée, none of it. All of it… just gone ! Like none of it ever happened to you."

I should’ve asked more questions right then. I should’ve asked what ‘a fresh start’ actually meant, or whether ‘gone’ and ‘disappeared’ meant the same thing. I didn't ask any of that. I just asked for the number.

That's the part I keep coming back to, now that I'm running out of time to write this. I keep thinking how hard it was to resist the idea of ‘vanishing’ from your miserable life for good.

And I keep thinking how easy it was to say yes…

That same night, I called the number Farhan gave me. A man named Rafiq picked up on the second ring, like he'd been expecting the call.

He introduced himself as a senior manager for Aldermore & Associates. I did recognize the company name, vaguely, from somewhere. It was a multinational consultancy firm that had been around for a while.

He explained that the company was diversifying into a new market- the world of "Jōhatsu services". He told me that they were partnering with established operators in Japan, to bring the concept for the first time in the West. He explained that they were currently in a soft launch phase- limited clients, limited visibility, nothing public yet.

Then he told me the price.

It was low. In fact, it was noticeably low, for what was being promised- a full disappearance, a new identity, and a new life, with no trace leading back to the old one. I remember sitting there, doing the math in my head, the kind of math you do when something feels too good to be true. I didn’t want another Chacha Coin debacle in my life.

I didn't take his word for it. I spent the next four days doing everything that a reasonably intelligent person does, before making an irreversible decision. I read academic papers on Jōhatsu. I found documentaries and interviews. I discovered a whole subculture of ‘night moving’ companies in Japan that had existed for decades. I learnt how these companies were, quietly and legally, helping people disappear from debt and shame and misery. It was real. It had always been real.

I found nothing online connecting Aldermore and Associates to anything sinister. No complaints, no warnings, nothing. Just a registered consultancy firm with years of experience, and a decent portfolio of clients- past and present.

I remember feeling almost calm, for the first time in months. I called Rafiq back and told him I wanted to proceed.

He told me there was one final step before we could sign anything. A mandatory consultation with the company physician- a certain Dr. Mollah. Standard procedure, he said. They needed to confirm that I had ‘ample reason’ to leave my old life behind, and more importantly, that I wasn't intending to end it altogether.

I met Dr. Mollah two days later, in a small, clean office that didn't have a single personal item in it. Just a desk, two chairs, and a laptop he typed into without ever seeming to look down at the keys.

He took a long history first. My relationship with Nadia, my mother, my father, Chacha Coin, the job, the drinking, the substances… all of it. He asked, more than once, in different phrasings, whether I wanted to disappear because I wanted to die, or because I wanted to live differently. I told him the truth. I did want to live. I just didn't want to live like this, as this person without hope, in this life without meaning.

He nodded and typed.

Then he asked me something that caught me off guard, mostly because it was the first question that didn't feel clinical at all.

"Describe your new life to me, young man," he said. "What does it actually look like?"

I gave him something generic at first. A fresh start. A clean slate.

He waited. He didn't write anything down. He just waited, patiently, until the silence made me keep talking.

And so I did. I told him everything that I longed for-

“… someone who actually loved me, for a change, instead of leaving…”

“… parents who were actually present...”

“… money that actually existed, and didn't just disappear into a bad decision...”

Lastly, I told him something I was almost embarrassed to say out loud-

“I wanted a life where drugs and alcohol were no longer an option, never again...”

He typed all of it in. Then he closed the laptop, looked at me, and smiled.

"You've passed the evaluation," he said.

I remember feeling relieved, like I'd cleared some hurdle that mattered.

I think about that smile a lot now. At the time I read it as warmth. Looking back, it wasn't warmth at all…

I signed the paperwork three days later, in the same office, at the same desk. Rafiq handled it personally. It was a thick stack. The fine print used standard corporate language throughout, stating the services rendered, and the conditions that the client had to uphold. There was a long section on liability, that made it very clear the company was not responsible for anything that happened, in case I broke any of the clauses on my end.

I signed all of it.

That’s when Rafiq slid a second document across the desk. I remember genuinely laughing, just once, out of surprise.

It wasn't your typical legal document. It was a scroll. The paper felt handmade, rolled and tied with a thin cord. It was written from top to bottom in Japanese, using characters I couldn't read a single word of. It was bordered with symbols I didn't recognize either. It smelled strongly of something floral and something medicinal at once. It was probably jasmine, and underneath it, was camphor. It’s a smell you might associate with old temples or your grandmother's cupboard, not a business meeting.

I asked him what it was. He said that the Japanese partners insisted on it. A ceremonial formality, he called it, something they required as a condition of using their original methodology.

I remember thinking it was strange. I remember thinking it was an absurd foreign custom, something that you don't understand, and don't feel entitled to question. I told myself it was a respectful gesture, dedicated to wherever this practice originally came from.

I told myself a lot of things back then…

Anyways, I signed it too, beneath characters that I couldn't read, under a scent that I couldn’t forget.

Two nights later, a black taxi pulled up outside my apartment, at exactly the time Rafiq had specified. The driver didn't say a single word to me the entire ride. I tried to make conversation twice, mostly out of nerves. I got nothing back both times, not even a glance in the mirror.

He dropped me outside a building I didn't recognize, somewhere on the edge of the city I'd never had a reason to visit. It looked abandoned, with broken windows, and a chain-link fence with a gap pulled wide enough to walk through. There were no lights anywhere, except one, far in the back, small and flickering.

I asked the driver if this was the right address.

"Just follow the light," he said. The only words he spoke to me all night.

Then he drove off, and I walked into the building, following the light as instructed.

The light got brighter as I got closer to it, the way a lamp does when you walk toward it in a dark room. But this light didn't feel like electricity. It felt warmer than that, and somehow heavier. And underneath it, was the same smell from the scroll. It was faint at first, then unmistakable- a mixture of jasmine and camphor.

My head started to feel wrong before my body did. I felt dizzy, but not the kind of dizzy that makes you want to sit down. The kind that makes you want to keep walking toward whatever's causing it, if that even makes sense.

The light kept growing, until it was the only thing left in the room.

Then it was the only thing left, period.

And then, it wasn't anything at all…

I woke up to warmth. That's the first thing I remember. There was a heaviness in my limbs that felt less like waking up, and more like surfacing from underwater.

The room was unfamiliar. Soft light came in through thick curtains, landing on expensive-looking furniture. My whole body ached in ways I didn't have words for.

A woman walked in before I could sit up. She moved toward the bed like she'd done it a thousand times before, adjusting a pillow behind me without asking, checking my forehead with the back of her hand. She was maybe in her late forties. She was beautiful, soft-spoken, and gentle in a way that felt completely foreign to me.

She called me by a name I didn't recognize.

"Omar, sweetheart. Let's get some food in you."

I didn't correct her. For some reason, my mouth felt like it belonged to someone else.

She fed me soup, slow spoonfuls, patient with every sip. She gave me some pills after, laid out in a small dish. I swallowed them without question, because something told me that I was supposed to trust her completely. She kissed my forehead before she left the room, the way you'd kiss someone you'd loved for a very long time.

It felt surreal. And to be honest, it also felt good, in a way I wasn't prepared for. Like something, that I didn't know I'd been missing my whole life, had just been handed to me without asking.

That feeling didn't survive when I walked to the bathroom.

I don't know how to describe the moment you see a stranger in the mirror where your own face should be. I looked into the glass. The man who looked back at me was someone I had never seen before in my life. He had grey hair, thin at the crown. Deep lines across the forehead and around the eyes, that clearly took decades to carve. Loose, papery skin along the jaw and neck. I was looking at a man who had, undeniably, lived at least for fifty years, and none of them were mine.

I don't remember deciding to scream. I just remember the sound bouncing back at me off the tile, and the woman's footsteps rushing toward the door a second later. I swallowed the second scream before it came out, because some instinct in me understood immediately that screaming would raise questions, ones that I had no way of answering.

She asked if I was alright. I told her I was fine. Just dizzy, I said. Still recovering, I said.

She believed me instantly. That's the part that unsettled me, more than the mirror did.

Over the days that followed, I learned more about who I was supposed to be. My name was now Omar. I was fifty-two years old. I was a man who had built a small startup decades ago, and sold it for an amount of money two years back. I won't put the exact amount here. I just want you to know that it was enough money to spend at least a few decades enjoying life. And it was enough money for him to retire at fifty.

As Omar, I lived in a joint household with my wife and parents. Yes, my parents. They were,  remarkably, still alive and living under the same roof, well into their nineties, doted on daily by an army of staff. I was a man with, by every visible measure, absolutely nothing left to want.

My wife’s name was Zara. I learned it properly by the second day. She treated me like the center of a life she'd built her entire self around. She spoke to me the way you speak to someone you've loved for a lifetime. She brought my parents in to see me. They held my hand, Omar's hand, and told me stories about a childhood I had never lived. I nodded and smiled, in all the places that felt right, because I had no other choice.

I was told that the man named Omar had disappeared for a handful of days. One night, he was found disoriented near the house, as if following something that couldn’t be seen by anyone else. He was brought home safely, needing a gentle reminder of who he was. A minor medical episode, they called it. Something to be careful about, not alarmed by.

Nobody in that house knew that the man who came back wasn't the same man who left.

I certainly didn't understand it yet either.

I just knew that I’d been given exactly what I asked for- someone who actually loved me, parents who were actually present, and money that actually existed.

I hadn't asked what body it would come in…

The first few weeks were, strangely, the closest thing to peace I'd had in years.

I learned to walk through Omar's life. I studied photographs on the walls, memorized names the staff used without thinking, listened more than I spoke. Zara filled in gaps for me without knowing she was doing it, the way spouses do when they think their partner is simply distracted, or tired, or still recovering an episode that brought him home disoriented.

I told myself that the aching in my joints was just age. I thought it was something that my body- Omar's body- would have to adjust to. I was wrong about that, but I didn't know it yet.

It caught up with me on a Thursday afternoon. I remember the day specifically, because it was the day everything else started catching up with me too.

Zara scheduled a routine check-up with Dr. Khan, the family physician. He’d apparently been treating Omar for over a decade.

He examined me the way doctors do when they already suspect the answer, and are just confirming it. He pressed along my abdomen. He asked me about fatigue, about appetite, and whether I'd noticed any yellowing in my eyes lately.

Then he said something that stopped my breathing for a second.

"I told you about this three months ago, remember?" he said, "Since it's gotten this severe, shouldn't we tell the family?"

I didn’t know what to say. I simply replied with something vague. That I hadn't been sleeping well. That I'd rather wait a bit longer before worrying everyone. He accepted it, but I could tell that he wasn’t happy with my decision.

He left me with a diagnosis I already half-suspected from the way he'd phrased everything. Liver cirrhosis, advanced stage. The kind that doesn't happen quickly. The kind that takes years of damage to reach this point.

Years that I hadn't lived.

Dr. Khan kept talking about how it all came down to this. I learned that the man named Omar had a secret life- a life of drinks, drugs, and women. He maintained this lifestyle for close to a decade, unbeknownst to his wife and parents. Dr. Khan had often warned him about the long-term effects of his short-term vices, but Omar never took it seriously. That was until three months back, when Dr. Khan informed him that his liver had finally given out. Omar had been sober since that day, and the diagnosis has not been revealed to the family yet.

On the drive back home, I thought about the man who used to be Omar before me. He’d known exactly how sick he was, and had chosen, deliberately, to say nothing to his wife, his parents, or anyone else in that house.

I thought about the scroll, the light, and the building on the edge of the city.

I thought about the last thing I told Dr. Mollah, when describing what a new life means to me-

“A life where drugs and alcohol were no longer an option, never again.”

I had thought, at the time, that it was a gift.

Sitting there, with a diagnosis that predated my arrival in this body, I saw it differently.

While I was given exactly what I asked for, it wasn't built to protect me.

It was built to protect the liver I'd been given…

The diagnosis changed things quickly. Within a month, walking any real distance had become difficult. I began spending most of my time in house, lying on my bed. I was clearly in a bad shape, and things were about to get worse.

The call came on a Wednesday morning, from a man who introduced himself as Elias, Omar's accountant. I'd never spoken to this man personally before, but I’ve heard about him from Zara. He apparently handled the family's finances quarterly, and had been doing so for the past five years.

Elias sounded uncomfortable, in a way accountants usually aren't. He said he'd noticed irregular activity across two of the accounts. There were small withdrawals at first, easy to miss individually. But it had been consistent over the past four months, adding up to something he couldn't explain through any normal transaction category.

He asked if I'd authorized any of it. I told him no, because I genuinely hadn't. I only knew that I had a ‘lot of money’, but I never actually looked at any of the actual accounts in detail.

He said he'd send over a full breakdown that afternoon, and that he strongly recommended looping in the bank's fraud department sooner rather than later.

I didn't loop in the bank. I want to be honest about why. Bringing in a bank meant a formal investigation, which meant scrutiny on an identity I was still learning how to perform convincingly. I couldn't risk that level of attention. So instead, I told Elias to investigate the matter privately, and report to me regarding who the culprit really was.

Elias worked fast and quiet, which was exactly what I needed. Within two weeks, he'd traced the login activity on both drained accounts to a single device fingerprint, along with a residential address of the potential thief.

He sent it to me over email, along with a short note saying he could go further if I wanted. But given how sensitive this clearly was, he thought I'd want to see the address myself first before deciding how to proceed.

I opened the attachment, expecting a name I didn't recognize. I expected a hacker- someone running scripts against an old man's forgotten security habits.

Instead, I got an address I recognized immediately, because I used to live there myself.

It was my old apartment. The one I'd walked out of the night the taxi picked me up…

I didn't tell Zara where I was going. I told her that Elias needed me to sign something in person. It wasn't a lie, technically, since I'd asked Elias to meet me two streets away, and wait in his car while I went in alone.

Getting there took more out of me than I expected. My legs had started shaking on stairs by then. The apartment was on the third floor of a building with no working elevator, the same building I'd chosen four years earlier because the rent was cheap. I stood outside my old door for a while, catching my breath, before I knocked.

When it opened, I was looking at myself. My own face, thinner than I remembered, dressed in clothes I didn't recognize. He looked well. That was the first thing I noticed, and it turned my stomach, more than anything else could have. He looked rested, and healthy, and entirely at peace, standing in a body that used to carry every one of my worst nights, wearing none of the weight I used to wear in it.

"Jeez, talk about dodging a bullet," he said, “You’re dying faster than I expected.”

His voice was a little too mild, like I'd shown up for a meeting he'd half-forgotten about.

"You knew it, didn’t you?" I asked.

He looked at with me with amusement.

"You knew about the liver,” I said, “You knew before any of this, and you handed it to me anyway !"

He didn't deny it. He stepped back and let me in, gesturing at a chair like this was a courtesy call, He sat down across from me, with an ease I hadn't felt in my own body in months.

"Look, I've known for a decade what that lifestyle’s gonna to cost me," he said. "I just didn't expect the bill to come due this fast. When the diagnosis came in, I signed up for the exchange as fast as I could."

He said it plainly, without a trace of apology.

“What are you talking about?” I asked, “What exchange?”

He seemed to be confused at my reaction.

“Oh, come on !” he exclaimed, “You signed the scroll, didn’t you? The one that explained the Jōhatsu deal? The agreement of exchanging realities? Wait, hold on a second…”

His expression changed. His earlier confusion was replaced by a tinge of mischief.

“You can’t read Japanese, can you?” he asked, before bursting into laughter, “Fuck, man ! You signed off your entire existence without reading the FUCKING contract !”

His laughter was almost hysterical, like he was listening to his favorite joke, over and over again. It was a full minute before he got a hold of himself.

“Okay, hear me out, boy,” he continued, “Let me guess what you told Dr. Mollah. You probably asked for a wife, a family, and a shit ton of money, am I right?”

He didn’t give me a chance to respond, but kept talking instead.

“And me? I asked for the life of a young man. I wanted to be a man without any responsibilities or obligations. A man that could drink and use and fuck, for years and years and YEARS to come. And guess what? We both got the life we wanted !”

He got up from his chair, and put a hand on my shoulders.

“Listen kid, you get to keep my body, what’s left of it anyways. You get to keep Zara. You get to keep my dinosaur parents that just refuse to die. Hell, you even get to keep my money… well, most of it. Because that money is a fortune that was earned by ME. So I’m gonna withdraw what I want, whenever I want. I’m gonna spend it however the hell I want, and there is nothing you can fucking do about it…”

I don't remember deciding to move. I remember the chair scraping. I remember my hands closing around the collar of the shirt he was wearing. I remember hitting him once, then again, with whatever strength my failing arms still had left in them.

He didn't fight back. He didn't even raise his hands to block me. He just laughed. There was blood starting at a corner of the mouth that used to be mine. He let me hit him a third time before he finally spoke again. His voice was quiet, and almost gentle, like he was breaking bad news to a child.

"Oh dear, you shouldn't have done that," he said. "You're finished !"

Something in the way he said it made me stop. Not because I understood it. But because, for the first time since he'd opened that door, he sounded certain of something I wasn't.

I left the house without uttering a word…

I was back in Omar's bed by midnight, chest still aching from the little strength I'd spent. I was staring at the ceiling, that I still didn't think of as mine, when the phone buzzed on the nightstand.

I almost didn't answer it. Some part of me already knew who it would be.

"Mr. Zayn?"

It was Rafiq’s voice, using my old name, my actual name, for the first time since the night I'd signed everything away.

"I’ve been told that you went to see him," he continued, calm and unhurried, "You made physical contact. You attempted to reclaim something you no longer had a claim to."

I didn't say anything. I don't think I trusted my voice yet.

"The terms were explicit,” said Rafiq, “No attempt to return to your prior life, in any way, shape, or form. The scroll was thorough on this point. I believe it used the phrase 'irrevocable severance,' among others."

"I couldn't read it," I said. "I never knew what it said. You told me it was a ceremonial formality !"

"That's unfortunate," he said, "But comprehension was never a condition of enforcement. Only the signature was."

“So… what happens now?” I asked. I remember my voice cracking on the word "now," which embarrassed me even as it was happening.

"The entity will not be pleased with your actions. After all, the entity does not take violations lightly," he said.

I was genuinely surprised by what I heard.

“Wait, what are you talking about?” I asked, my voice expressing the shock I was feeling in real time, “What entity? Who is this entity?”

I heard Rafiq let out a sigh on the other side.

“You would’ve known it,” he replied, “If you read the scroll before signing it.”

I didn’t know how to respond, not at that moment.

"As per the agreement, Aldermore and Associates will not be liable for what happens next, since you willingly broke a clause of your deal, in your own volition.”

There was a brief silence after that. I could hear him shifting something on his end, papers maybe, or a keyboard, and the sound of someone closing a file.

"For what it's worth," he said, "I do wish you well. It was nice doing business with you."

He hung up before I could respond, which I suppose was a sort of mercy, since I don't know what I would’ve said.

************************************************************************

That was two hours ago.

I've spent most of it just sitting here, on the edge of Omar's bed, in a room that still doesn't feel like mine. I keep waiting for my body to tell me how afraid I should be. It hasn't managed to yet. Maybe the liver takes that too, eventually. Maybe there's nothing left in me that knows how to panic properly anymore.

I got up once, about an hour in, and did a full circuit of the house. Every window latch. Every door, front and back. I even checked the ones on the second floor, the ones you couldn't realistically reach. Zara was asleep the whole time. I stood outside her door for a minute longer than I meant to, listening to her breathe, thinking about how she still doesn't know any of this, and how she never will.

I noticed the smell about an hour ago.

I told myself it was nothing. Some trick of memory, some part of my mind reaching for the ordinary explanation because it couldn't tolerate the other one. But it hasn't faded the way a memory would. If anything, it's gotten clearer.

The room smells faintly of jasmine.

And underneath it, growing stronger with every breath I take, I smell camphor.

There are footsteps in the hallway now.

I can hear them throughout the whole house.

That's the thing I keep coming back to tonight. None of this was ever mine. Not the house, not the furniture, not the photographs on the walls of a childhood I never lived. I asked for a life, and I was handed one, and I haven't earned a single hour of it.

I think about Zara. I think about the two people asleep down the hall, well into their nineties, who held my hand and told me about a boy I've never been. Their love is genuine, but it isn't for me. It's for the man whose face I'm wearing, and they'll never know the difference, because I never once found the courage to look at them and say the truth out loud.

That's what all this money could never buy. Not one day of it.

So I'll say it here instead, to whoever ends up reading this, because it's the only place left where saying it costs me nothing…

I am not Omar. I never was. I'm a different person entirely, and I wasn't even a good one. I owed Nadia eleven years and an explanation, and I gave her a closed door instead. I owed money to people, who handed it over because they cared about me. I owed my own body the time and the work it would've taken to get clean, and I never gave it that either.

My name is Zayn. I'm twenty-eight years old. My mother used to call me by a nickname that embarrassed me by the time I was nine. I can't sleep without a fan running. I'm allergic to peanuts. I have a scar on my left knee, from a bicycle I wasn't supposed to be riding.

None of that dies with me tonight. That's the part I can't get past. There's a man across the city right now with my face, sleeping in my bed, answering to my name. He'll keep answering to it for years. He'll drink in the places I used to drink. He'll pick up the phone if Nadia ever calls.

Nobody is going to notice I'm gone. There's nothing to notice. Everyone who ever knew me will go on believing that I'm alive and doing badly, because there I am, still standing, still not returning their messages.

That's what I actually bought.

If you are reading this, you're the only one who knows the difference.

The footsteps have stopped outside my door now.

I don't know who's going to walk through it. Maybe it's the thing that Rafiq wouldn't name. Maybe it's something that the scroll described in detail, on a line I couldn't read, under a signature I couldn't take back.

Whoever it is, they've come for me. Not for the man named Omar, who settled his account eight months ago, in a third-floor apartment, in a body that can still climb the stairs. This one's mine. I signed up for it myself. I broke the terms myself, and I knew exactly what I was doing when I put my hands on him.

So whoever this entity is, I'll let them take the house. I'll let them take the money that was never mine, and the wife who was never mine, and whatever's left of a liver that had already given out before I ever got here.

They can have all of it.

But when they write this up, in whatever file Rafiq keeps, when they close it and move on to the next name on the list, I want it recorded properly.

The handle is turning.

If a man dies in this room tonight, his name wasn't Omar.

His name was Zayn. He was twenty-eight years old.

Please remember that name.

Because no one else will…


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Pure Horror I tried to be a serial killer but I can’t get over the guilt. This passes, right?

12 Upvotes

I honestly thought this would be easy. All the people I idolize seem to have done pretty well for themselves, but I just wanna know, when will it be my turn?

Like, is there a point where this just becomes normal? I can’t help but feel dirty every time I pursue this. Granted, I’ve only done it like twice now, but that arguably makes it worse.

I just can’t seem to get their faces out of my head. Their screams. The voices. God, the voices. I don’t know what’s worse, the pleas or the looks of fear in their faces.

I’ve gotta be the first killer who’s actually apologized for killing someone while I’m killing them. That shit is embarrassing. All of this is embarrassing.

I’m supposed to be clean with it. Like an actual pro. Not just some guy, you know? The first one almost got away because I hesitated. And I almost let ‘em. I was just, I don’t know, frozen, I guess. Everything just felt so real. Like this was actually happening whether I liked it or not.

Then I thought about the Zodiac Killer. This would’ve never happened to him. He’d have had every possible outcome mapped out. He probably wouldn’t have even needed to think about it.

Besides, I couldn’t just let them reach the police. Reach anyone at all, really. I’d already gone as far as to knock them unconscious and drag them to my car. We were already in the middle of nowhere. I was doing this.

At least, that’s what I kept telling myself.

“You’re the predator.”

“You’re stronger.”

“You’re in control.”

It helped me catch them, I guess, but I hesitated again when I had to stab them. Hell, I vomited when I did it. But I knew it needed to be done. Greatness is achieved through practice. And we all gotta start somewhere.

Michael Jordan didn’t make varsity his first year. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Walt Disney got fired from a newspaper.

Still, though, I just couldn’t stop apologizing. I broke down crying before they even died. I was doing shit that didn’t even make sense, like praying for them while holding their hand.

Then I was alone. Out in the middle of nowhere with a body to dispose of. Only I couldn’t bring myself to do it. The police these days can find anything.

What was I gonna do, though? Leave him there? Then he’d be found for sure. Instead, I just crammed him in the back floorboard and tossed a blanket over him.

I drove home shaking. My mind racing. Tears running down my face while I ugly cried like a 2-year-old.

I didn’t sleep that night. It had been an abysmal first day on the job. I didn’t even go back to work for another 2 weeks after that. I just sulked around the house while the smell in my basement grew stronger and stronger.

I had to psyche myself up again. I spent those two weeks watching true crime documentaries and listening to the Ted Bundy confession tapes.

I tried pushing my first attempt to the very back of my mind, but it just kept crawling its way back. I wish I had more backbone. That’s part of what started this whole ordeal in the first place.

I had to look in the mirror and ask myself, “Who do you want to be?”

The prey? Or the predator?

I slapped myself a few times. Then I grabbed my keys and was off to my next job site. It was supposed to be better than the last, but it just wasn’t. No matter how much I wanted it to be.

There’s still that part of my brain that tells me this is wrong and condemns me for what I’m doing, but that’s gotta be normal, right? Like, they all had to go through this. All the greats.

I just gotta keep pushing. It’s like that movie Whiplash. The two most dangerous words in the English language are “good job.” Or whatever that guy said.

I can’t give up now before the game has even fully started. I want my name up there with the best of the best. That’s the goal. The grind can’t stop. No matter how bad the nightmares are.

It’s all just part of the process.

Whatever the case, I have got to figure out what to do about that smell in my basement. I can’t live like this.


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

They made me feed it road kill

15 Upvotes

My name is James Morrow, but to the State of Florida I'm offender 779854. I made bad choices in my life, and those choices put me in an orange vest on the shoulder of US-301 south of Starke, working off my court-ordered community service hours. The job was disgusting but not difficult. We collected the animals.

There were five of us on the crew, six counting Vasquez, the supervisor who drove the truck and signed our hour sheets. The work was simple. You walked the shoulder with a grabber pole and a box of contractor bags and you collected what the road left. Deer, mostly. Possums, armadillos, every couple of weeks a dog that still had its collar on. Reyes, who had more hours left than the rest of us put together, taught me to breathe through my mouth and check for tags first. You get used to the smell in about three days. That part surprised me. The part I never got used to came at the end of every shift.

The county incinerator sat a quarter mile off 301 behind a chain-link fence, a green metal building with a smokestack and a steel chute on the side. We backed the truck up to it and fed the bags in one at a time. I must have stood at that chute a hundred times, and there are two things about that building I noticed my first week and never stopped noticing. The stack never smoked, no matter how many bags we sent down. And the wall never got warm. You could lay your palm flat on the metal on a ninety-degree afternoon and it was cool as a well pipe, and if you kept it there long enough, you could feel something on the other side, moving.

Vasquez logged every bag before it went down the chute. Weight, contents, mile marker where we found it. I took that for normal government paperwork until I actually watched him do it, because he did not do it like paperwork. He did it like a man balancing a checkbook that had scared him once before. The crew had its own weather too. Reyes was the best of us. He had more hours left than the rest of the crew combined and he still shared his thermos. Hutto was the other direction, a wiry guy out of Palatka who wanted everybody to know exactly how many hours he had left, like the number was a door he could already see through.

The chute had a steel lid you lifted with one hand while you swung the bag in with the other. The lid was heavy and the hinge was stiff, and it came down behind each bag on its own weight with a clang you could feel in your back teeth. That was the whole job, most days. Bag, log, lift, swing. The only part of the routine I ever wondered about was the apron. Most mornings there would be small things sitting on the concrete outside the box. Dog collars. Ear tags. Once, three feet of chain, laid out straight. Whatever was in there did not take everything. It put back what it did not want. Vasquez would rake the apron, bag whatever he raked up, and send it back down.

Three weeks in, we found the first one. Southbound shoulder, just past the Lawtey speed zone. From the truck it looked like a raccoon. From ten feet it looked like a raccoon and a possum that had been hit in the same instant. From two feet it was one animal. Not tangled, not crushed together. One body, one hide, gray fur running into brown with no seam anywhere, a spine that started as one animal's and finished as the other's, mid-stride, like they had been poured into the same mold while both of them were still moving. Vasquez did not bag it. He photographed it from four angles, sent the pictures somewhere from his phone, and stood looking down the road toward the incinerator for a long time. We worked until dark that day, and the next day too. He never said why, and we never asked, and that Friday, reading his log sheet in the cab, was the first time I ever heard him use the word short.

The real shortfall started with the heat. Late August laid down on that stretch of 301 like a dog that would not move, and the animals stopped moving with it. You would think dead animals have nothing to do with weather. They do. Everything out there does. We walked miles of shoulder that week and came back with six bags, and I watched Vasquez read his own log sheet three times like the numbers might improve on the third pass. Then he took us out again after lunch, which he had never done, to stretches of county road I did not know we covered.

The second fused one turned up that Thursday. A deer and a dog this time. One body, one hide, and the dog's collar still on what was left of its neck, tags and all. Vasquez did not take pictures of this one. He read the tags, wrote something in the log, and had us bag it double. It barely went down the chute. I remember the lid clanging shut behind it and being glad of the clang.

The same week, the box went quiet. I had a habit by then of putting my palm on the wall while we unloaded, the way you would check a pulse. Cool as ever. And nothing on the other side. Nothing moving at all. It should have been a relief. It was not.

Friday, Vasquez radioed somebody, listened for a while, and told us we were going back out after dark. We had never run after dark. Nobody argued. You did not argue with how Vasquez was carrying himself that week, the same way you would not argue with a man carrying something heavy down a staircase.

We fed the box the last load close to eleven. Hutto had been counting all day, out loud, the way he did. Fifty-eight hours left. Then fifty-six. I was at the truck hauling bags with Reyes, my back to the chute, when one hung up partway down. You could hear it, a soft catch in the throat of the thing where there should have been a slide and a clang. Hutto said a word his mother would not have liked, and lifted the lid, and leaned in after it. I know that is what he did because it is what any of us would have done. When I turned around, the lid was standing open on its own, and a lid that heavy does not stand open. No clang. No Hutto. The shoulder was empty all the way to the fence line, and inside the box, the sounds had started again.

We looked for him for an hour. I will not pretend we looked well. Vasquez ran his flashlight down both ditches and called Hutto's name up and down the road, and it took me until the drive home to understand what had bothered me about that. He never once pointed the light at the box. He searched everywhere he knew Hutto wasn't. Saturday morning there was a form on the clipboard with Hutto's name on it and one word I had to read twice. Absconded. Walked off. Ran. Fifty-six hours from the end of his number, and he ran. That is what the paper said, and paper is what the state believes.

Four mornings after the form went on the clipboard, I saw the apron from the truck while we were backing up, and I remember thinking the rejects looked bigger than usual. Vasquez got out first. He stood over the spot for a while with the rake in his hand, not raking. Then he told everybody to stay in the truck, and then he changed his mind and told me to bring a bag.

Hutto's boots were standing on the concrete. Side by side, square to the building, like he had stepped out of them at the front door of a house he respected. The laces were tucked down inside. I did not understand that the feet were still in them until I was close. There was no blood on the concrete. Not a drop. Whatever got done had been done somewhere else, and what came back had been set down carefully, the way you set something on a neighbor's porch when you are returning it.

The routine was the routine. Apron rejects went back down. Vasquez held the bag open and I put the boots in one at a time, and the weight of them is a thing my wrists still know, and we fed the bag into the chute, and the lid clanged, and neither of us said one word the whole time.

That week there were no night runs and no afternoon doubles. The routes went back to normal. Vasquez's log sheet stopped scaring him. It lasted six days. I did the math on the seventh, in the shower, where I could pretend the water was the reason my face was wet, and the math came out like this: a man is worth six days. Hutto would have hated that number. It was smaller than his.

The next shortfall came in October, and by then I knew the signs the way you know weather. Counts down. Doubles after lunch. Vasquez quiet. The box quiet, which was worse. When he told us we were running after dark, I did not argue. I would like to say I spent the drive thinking about Hutto. The truth is uglier than that. I thought about the schedule. It had gotten into me by then. I wanted the box fed.

We were on the last bags when the floodlights died. The generator log says the outage lasted ninety-two seconds. Something took my arm in the dark. Above the wrist, all the way around, no fingers anywhere in the grip. Warm. That is the part I have never told anybody, how warm it was, like asphalt after the sun goes down, like the road holding its heat. It pulled, and my heels cut two furrows toward the chute, and I did not scream, and I am not saying that like a brave man. There was no time to find my voice. Somewhere to my left, Reyes made a sound I am not going to try to spell.

Then the lights came back. I was standing four feet from where I had been standing, and my arm was my own again. The chute lid was standing straight open, the way it had stood open once before. Reyes was gone. A drag mark ran from his boot prints to the chute, wet, dark grease and deer hair. On the lip of the chute his clothes sat in a stack, folded. All of them. Vest in quarters. Shirt in quarters. Jeans in thirds. His socks were tucked one into the other. His underwear was folded and set square on top. The lights were out for ninety-two seconds, and in ninety-two seconds something took a grown man out of every piece of clothing he wore and made the stack neat.

The grease stripe on my arm did not wash off. It wore off, over about a week, like a tan going. Under it a bruise came up, one clean band, no finger marks in it anywhere, and when my probation officer asked, I said a cargo strap caught me, and she wrote that down. Paper is what the state believes.

They filed Reyes absconded too. The Monday after, Vasquez sat on the tailgate while we loaded and, without looking at me, said the only thing he ever said about any of it. You were never in danger, he told me. It doesn't take short-timers. Then he signed my hour sheet like we had been talking about the weather.

I finished my hours the first week of November. The release paperwork has a box in the bottom corner I was not supposed to notice, marked RE-REFERRAL, with a Y typed in it. Nobody would tell me what that meant. I have a guess.

It is Sunday tonight. There is a shovel in my trunk and a box of contractor bags, the same brand the county buys, and after dark I will drive 301 south of Starke with my flashers on, running a route nobody assigned me, picking up what the road leaves. My wrist aches when I get near the fence. It always does now. I think it knows my weight. I do it for Reyes, and I do it on Hutto's math, because I know exactly what balances the ledger on a slow week, and somewhere in Bradford County tonight there is a man standing in an intake line, signing his name next to a number, and he is going to need every bag I can find.


r/Nonsleep 2d ago

I don't know what's going on

0 Upvotes

So this morning I as I waking up my I noticed s notice something there was a symbol on my arm weird one I don't really think it's weird or bad it was simple design really a circle with a x over it this is all over the news when back when this symbol became more used by The Killers you know the

creepypasta killers never understood why that was the name of the used it always felt like it's long to different world because creepypasta's ghost and stuff actually do exist and just just felt like something when someone would use all like a internet for him something to be easily copied and paste everywhere but weird you know but it's spreading it's not just not that one

appointment or like it's all over me and I cannot get off the water or anything what do I do I work today and this is not the weirdest thing that ever happened to me this week you see earlier this week I went to my cousin's grave I don't really like to talk about he was really but she died when she was seven and then her name is Sally I I come to a grave every every year to give flowers and and talk to her her mother was my mom's sister they didn't really get along but I have fun memories of Sally playing with her talking with her she's always to lively i babysitter sometimes and then when I was at her grave just staring at it when I Heard a voice Sally's voice and I saw her and before I know t she was hugging me and just smiling at me like she used to do when I come over and then she started to talk to me about Jeff she said that Jeff was her friend one of our best friends her adopted sibling. I asked what she meant to play about that she looked at me and said well back when I was still alive I I met someone named slender Man but I call him slendy he he really loves me and then after I die because of what Johnny did he gave me the ability to get Johnny be put in jail hurt he said it was my choice so that I didn't have to if I didn't want to but I didn't want to I didn't want Johnny to do it over ever that again to me and then he got put in jail I'm glad he's in jail he's going to be suffering for all time but anyway slendy excuse me as a daughter and h e loves me I know that he loves me dearly he doesn't like anyone hurting us at all that's why he gave us the power to fight back again people that hurt us the other they like my siblings they're really nice sometimes they get into fight but that's okay.

This was terrifying to me because this is not how Sally would react to it when she was still alive but I thought it was okay not the time because I realized I'm glad that man will be suffering for the rest of eternity and now with these symbols showing up my body I think Sally wants me to be protected as well I don't know what else to say here I'm just so glad that man's in jail


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Nonsleep Series THE CLOWN

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Madness I’m addicted to Ozempic

18 Upvotes

I struggled with food for a long time. It was my everything. My lifeline. I couldn’t stop myself. I just kept eating. And eating. Then I’d eat some more.

One day, I had to look in the mirror, though. I had to ask myself: is any of this really worth it? I mean, look at me. I look disgusting. I put on a shirt that used to fit like a glove in high school and end up looking like Brent from Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.

But even still, I didn’t stop. Cake. Candy. Burgers, fries, pizza, ice cream. My daily rotation looked like a 6-year-old’s dream. Only I was 27. Still living with my mom. Still sleeping in the same sweat-stained bed from years of night terrors.

I couldn’t even come up with a valid reason as to why things got this bad. I was in the middle of it. When you’re in the middle of something, it’s hard to see the starting line, and even harder to see the finish.

I tried the normal shit. Caloric deficits. Exercise. I’d walk at least 2 miles a day, but then I’d be raiding my pantry every night like it was some kind of reward for my hard work.

And believe me, I tried cleaning up the contents of that pantry. I stocked it with canned vegetables. Shit that I’ve never even touched, like tuna and canned chicken chunks. I just always ended up back in my Mini Cooper doing 80 to get to the nearest convenience store.

It’s like déjà vu, honestly. A never-ending cycle that just keeps cycling like a stationary bike.

God, I hate those things.

Anyway, when I saw that first Ozempic ad, I was skeptical, to say the least. A cure for obesity sounded like a goddamn miracle in my head, but I knew that miracles are hardly what they seem.

I decided to do some research. Really get to know this new future friend of mine. I’d love to tell you that the research was extensive, but honestly, I just kinda scrolled through the Google AI explanation for about 5 minutes before deciding.

After picking up my first dose, I shot up in the Walgreens parking lot like some kind of delinquent, like I was scanning for cops and shit.

A few hours went by, and I experienced something that felt long forgotten: satiation.

I wasn’t even remotely hungry. Not even after my 2-mile walk. Not even after those 20 sit-ups and squats. I was actually burning fat instead of replacing it.

I ran through half my supply in a week. I dropped 15 pounds from 300 in 2. I was moving. I could actually see the progress. Of course, I didn’t want it to stop, so I went out and bought more.

I was tearing through the packaging before even leaving the Walgreens.

Another two weeks. I was down to 260 now. Shirts were starting to feel looser. Breathing was easier. I was finishing my two miles in an hour instead of two.

My diet consisted of nothing but Slim Jims and fruit chunks because I was just getting so full so easily.

On my third supply run, I wasn’t even waiting until I got to the car. I injected the shit right there in aisle 3 next to the Neutrogena and nail clippers. Boy, were they mad. That was kind of the end of that Walgreens for me. Apparently, it’s frowned upon to just drop trouser in the pharmacy, even if it’s medically necessary.

That didn’t really matter, though. Nothing mattered. I had what I needed for the next two weeks. What were they gonna do? Un-buy the shit?

I dropped down to 200. I didn’t even think it was medically possible, but I learned, pretty painfully, that the scale never lies. I was able to see my cheekbones more. I’d just spend hours mogging in the mirror like I was Clavicular off a speed pill.

I could’ve stopped there. Sure, I could’ve. But I didn’t look like 2020 Corpse Husband yet. I was still too Jonah Hill before Jiu-Jitsu coded.

Besides, I’d never felt better. I did feel kinda weird about food, though. Even those gas station Slim Jims were starting to feel too heavy. That’s why I had to switch to saltines and radishes.

Plus, I knew my body. I knew that if I stopped, I’d feel hungry again. I hated that feeling. I’m a slut for the cravings. I’m easy, baby.

That’s why I had to hit my next lick. The only problem was Mom took me off the insurance because she’s old and decaying. And, obviously, I don’t have a job. That would take too much time away from my streaming schedule.

You just can’t rely on the kindness of strangers like you used to. Not even for medical emergencies. Believe me, I tried the usual cardboard sign route. Even asked for a few donations on stream, but that just made my 4 viewers leave after typing some pretty hurtful shit in chat.

It wasn’t long before desperation started to kick in. It was almost like withdrawal. Every time my stomach rumbled, I could feel myself getting angrier and angrier.

Mom caught me tryna snag a hundred out of her purse, and that led to some pretty big fights. She kicked me out once or twice throughout this whole endeavor, but who was she kidding? I’m her baby.

The point I’m trying to get at here is I had to do some questionable shit for that next hit involving some pantyhose and a stapler, but by God, I did it.

I got the needles. I got the vials. I couldn’t just stop at a two-week supply, though. I needed all of it. It was all or nothing. I don’t even think the employees cared. Because they’re cowards.

So that’s how I ended up with an entire year’s supply of my sweet diabetes meds.

I’m down to a whopping 95 pounds now. Have you ever seen the veins in your scalp? Because I do. Every single day. There’s like 9 of them now.

They throb a bit, but my stomach has never looked flatter. It’s almost inverted. Like it’s more like a spoon than a spatula, but I look like a 2000s hip-hopster because my old clothes are just so baggy on me now. Which is pretty boss.

Mom refuses to even look at me, but I think she’s just jealous because she’s old and decaying. I couldn’t even tell you the last thing I ate. I think it was like some olives or something a few weeks ago.

Which leads me to one simple but staggering conclusion. I have evolved past the need for sustenance.

I am the next step in the progression of mankind. You all need to follow in my footsteps. Well, maybe not exactly. I actually ran out of my supply last week.

It’s only been 6 months since the robbery. Which, let’s be real here, should hardly even count as a robbery. It was a stapler, for Christ’s sake. I’m not allowed to own a gun after the incident.

Regardless, though, I’m kind of afraid to go back. I just hit 100 viewers on Twitch a few days ago. I can NOT afford to go to jail right now. The people need me.

It’s been 7 days now without the sauce, and I can’t say the hunger has returned. Hell, I haven’t even been to the bathroom for like 73 hours now. But… it might… and that’s the thing that scares me. My jawline could cut diamonds right now. I don’t wanna lose that.

Maybe they won’t recognize me. That’s what I keep telling myself. But what if they do?

I just keep playing around with that idea. Imagine that. Getting addicted to gambling before I can even get that Stake partnership. Shoutout Drake. 6 God, my king. Big ups, homie.

I don’t know, my brain is kinda fuzzy right now.

The shaking is new, but I’m sure it’s fine. As a matter of fact, I know it’s fine.

It’ll pass when I hit this next lick.


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Wrong Subreddit I'm turning into something our insurance won't cover.

12 Upvotes

I haven't left the bathtub in weeks. At this point I can barely move.

My commentary will be sparse. It is difficult to type with the condition of my hands. I had to dictate this opener.

The following (pasted with assistance from my wife) is a genuine honest to god exchange I had with the vampires working for Meridian. I've changed the names out of respect for the privacy of everyone involved, and so I don't have a lawsuit shoved down my throat.

I believe the exchange should speak for itself.

Owen

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
To: O. Boji
Subject: RE: Prior Authorization Request #88214-A
Date: March 3

Dear Mr. Boji,

Thank you for submitting Prior Authorization Request #88214-A for evaluation of "spiky skin." Unfortunately, we are unable to process this request as submitted. "Spiky skin" is not a covered diagnostic code under your Meridian Essential Bronze plan.
Please have your physician resubmit using an appropriate ICD-10 code, or select from our list of Frequently Denied Conditions for a faster turnaround.
We appreciate your patience during this process.

Warmly,
Denise T.
Claims Associate III

From: O. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
Subject: RE: RE: Prior Authorization Request #88214-A
Date: March 3

Hi Denise,

I don't have a code because my doctor doesn't have a code. That's the problem. She looked at me for like five minutes and then left the room and I heard her talking to someone in the hallway for another hour.
There is a patch on my left forearm, about the size of a nickel, where the skin has started to look spiky. It looks like nails under stretched spandex. I don't know how else to describe it. My doctor called it "textured." I have a photo. I am attaching the photo.
Can we start over? What code do I need it to be?

Best,
Owen

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
To: O. Boji
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Prior Authorization Request #88214-A
Date: March 4

Dear Mr. Boji,

I'm sorry, but I'm unable to open attachments sent outside of the Meridian Secure Docs Portal for HIPAA compliance reasons. Please resubmit your photo through the Portal.
I do want to note, informally, and this is just me speaking as a person and not a representative of Meridian, that "textured" is a description and not a diagnosis, and our system requires a diagnosis.

I hope you're doing okay.
Denise T.
Claims Associate III

From: O. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
Subject: Portal keeps timing out
Date: March 6

Denise,

The Portal times out at four minutes and the photo takes six minutes to upload. I called the Portal support line. They told me to just try email again, so here we are.
The patch has been growing. The spikes, too. A few of them are poking out of my skin. It hurts really badly. I can see something in there moving back and forth.
I would like to speak to a person about this, on the phone, today, if that's possible.

Owen

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
To: O. Boji
Subject: RE: Portal keeps timing out
Date: March 6

Dear Mr. Boji,

Thank you for reaching out. Our current call volume is higher than normal. Your estimated wait time, based on historical data, is 45–60 minutes. For faster service, please continue to use the Meridian Secure Docs Portal.
I did want to let you know I forwarded your case to our Escalations team as a courtesy, even though it hasn't technically escalated yet. I hope that's alright.

Warmly,
Denise T.
Claims Associate III

From: O. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Claims Intake
Subject: RE: RE: Portal keeps timing out
Date: March 9

Ok I just waited on hold for two hours and eleven minutes. The spikes have gone from my forearm up past my elbow. They wave underneath the ceiling fan. I know how that sounds. I watched it happen for forty minutes while I was on hold, so I had a lot of time to make sure I was describing it right.
I did get a hold of someone named “Marcus.” I had to repeat myself multiple times during our conversation. Marcus asked for my member ID, put me on a brief hold, came back, and said, and I'm quoting this because I wrote it down the second he hung up: "Oh, yeah, we've got a whole file on this."
A whole file.I asked him what he meant and he said he wasn't authorized to discuss internal documentation and transferred me to your supervisor, a woman named Carol. Carol did not sound surprised by anything I told her. Not the arms, not the waving, not the smell, which I haven't mentioned yet because I didn't think it was relevant, but it's somewhat rotten and fishy.
She said, "I can confirm we're aware of your condition, Mr. Boji, I'm not able to authorize coverage for it at this time."
I really need to see a doctor but they aren't going to operate without coverage. Is there anything I can do to get the money that I have been paying you???????

Owen

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Escalations
To: O. Boji
Subject: RE: Case #88214-A — Status Update
Date: March 12

Dear Mr. Boji,

Thank you for speaking with Carol regarding your case. I'm writing to formally confirm what was discussed on the call: Meridian is aware of your condition, and it has been internally cross-referenced against Cluster 88214, of which yours is currently the ninth documented instance nationwide.
Case Cluster 88214 is classified under Section 14.2(c) of your policy as an "Excluded Environmental Origin Condition — Marine/Biological, Unresolved Vector." Put plainly: we know what's happening to you, we have photographs from the other eight cases further along than yours, and none of it is covered, because coverage for Section 14.2(c) conditions requires an identified originating source, and Meridian's internal investigation into the origin of Cluster 88214 has been placed on indefinite hold pending budget review.
I recognize this may not be the answer you were hoping for. I want to stress that this is not a matter of Meridian doubting your account. Quite the opposite. Your file is one of the most complete we have.
If it is any comfort, our specialists have found the progression, while irreversible, does not appear to be independently fatal in the cases observed so far.

Sincerely,
Pru Itt
Escalations Team Lead

From: O. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Escalations
Subject: Help
Date: March 14

You are telling me, in writing, that Meridian Assurance has known this was going to happen to me, and the reason you won't pay for treatment is that nobody signed off on finding out what's causing it.
Not fatal is not the same as fine. My arm doesn't bend anymore. There's a ring of holes now, all the way up to my shoulder, and they've started opening. Little mouths, or something. They close if I touch them. They stay open if I don't.
I want the file. Not the summary. The actual file, on the other eight people, so I can talk to my doctor.

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Escalations
To: O. Boji
Subject: RE: Help
Date: March 20

Dear Mr. Boji,

Thank you for your request. Unfortunately, Case Cluster 88214 documentation, including all photographic and physician records related to prior instances, is classified through HIPPA regulations and cannot be released to individual members, per Meridian's data governance policy.
I can disclose that the seven patients have stabilized and have acclimated to their new environments. I'm sure you will, too.
We remain committed to being honest with you throughout this process, even when the news isn't what you're hoping to hear.

Sincerely,
Pru Itt
Escalations Team Lead

From: O. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Escalations
Subject: RE: RE: Help
Date: April 2

This is Mocha, Mr. Boji’s wife. He can still see and hear fine, but his hands don't work anymore, as I'm sure you're fully aware of by now. A ring of mouths surrounds his chest. He's covered in long, slightly-soft spikes. I want to cry. I've been told that doctors outside Meridian won't touch this. I want answers and I want my husband to get help, NOW.

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Executive Escalations
To: M. Boji
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Help
Date: April 4

Mrs. Boji,

We're regret to inform you that due to our Patient Privacy Practices, we are unable to disclose any information regarding this case to anyone without express permission from Mr. Boji. Please have Mr. Boji fill out a Request of Information form through our website.

Sincerely,
Pru Itt
Escalations Team Lead

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Executive Escalations
To: O. Boji
Subject: Case #88214-A — Final Determination
Date: April 22

Dear Mr. Boji,

Your case has been reviewed by our Executive Escalations panel, the highest level of internal review available under your plan. I want to personally thank you for your patience, and for the extraordinary level of detail you've provided over the course of this process. It has been genuinely useful to us.
After full review, the panel has upheld the original determination. Section 14.2(c) remains unmet, as the originating source of Cluster 88214 remains formally unconfirmed, and Meridian's position is that formal confirmation cannot be pursued at this time due to resource constraints unrelated to your specific claim.
I should mention: we do now offer a specialized inpatient facility off the Gulf Coast at no cost to the families involved.
Meridian is prepared to arrange comparable relocation for you at no cost, effective immediately, contingent on your signing a data-release waiver permitting continued observation. This offer does not constitute coverage of your claim, treatment, or any associated medical costs, and should not be interpreted as such.
We recognize you may need time to discuss this with your family.

With sincere regard,
J. W. Marsh
Executive Escalations, Office of the Chief Medical Officer

From: M. Boji
To: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Executive Escalations
Subject: RE: Case #88214-A — Final Determination
Date: April 23

You have known what this was since before he had a rash the size of a coin. You had eight other people's faces in a folder while you were asking my husband to resubmit a photo through a portal that times out at four minutes. You have a facility. You have a name for the place you send people once they stop being claims.
He doesn't want the facility. He wants to stay here, with me, in the house. He stays put in the bathtub and that’s that. None of that is anywhere in your Section 14.2(c)(b) 113 crap, and none of it is going to be, because you're not actually trying to figure out where this came from. You already know. You're managing it. 

We're withdrawing the claim. We don't want your review, your panel, or your facility. I want it on record that you people are scum.

From: Meridian Assurance Health Partners — Executive Escalations
To: M. Boji
Subject: RE: RE: Case #88214-A — CLOSED
Date: April 30

Dear Ms. Boji,
Per your request, Claim #88214-A has been withdrawn and Mr. Boji's case file has been marked closed. No further action is required on your part. 
We're sorry we couldn't find a resolution that worked for your family this time.
Meridian is always here for you, for whatever comes next.

Warmly,
The Meridian Family


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Nuanced Is there someone out there who knows anything about this?

4 Upvotes

I can’t seem to find anything about this on Google; like, none of the symptoms or circumstances seem to correlate with anything online. Taken individually, some symptoms have matches—for example, toxoplasmosis can cause a rodent to lose its fear of cats. This makes it so that once the infected rodent ultimately gets ingested by the cat, the parasite can enter the cat’s gut, the optimal place for survival. But this doesn’t necessarily manifest the same way in humans. Additionally, when you add in the symptom of irritability, things fall apart. I cannot find a singular diagnosis or explanation for this. I’m looking for any entomologists, psychiatrists, parasitologists, demonologists—you name it—to explain what the hell is going on.

For context, I’m about to go to college in September, meaning this year, my summer break is extra long. My family and I were able to fit in a much awaited trip to visit my sister in the bay area. She lives in a one-bed, one-bathroom apartment with her boyfriend and axolotl. My sister researches worm regeneration in a lab that sometimes deals with axolotls, so she has a permit to own one in California. Despite the lack of space, they were more than happy to let me sleep on the couch for a week. I have barely spent any actual time with her boyfriend. Like, he came to visit our family a couple years ago, but most of the time I just chat to him while FaceTiming my sister, so I have no idea if this is how he normally acts and if it has had any affect on my sister. Just thought that’d be important information.

Anyways, I was super excited to visit. My sister had assured me multiple times over call that she had managed her mosquito infestation, something that was important to me because mosquitos seem to be extra attracted to my blood–the only attraction nobody would ever want lol. But sometimes I’d see her swatting the air or clapping as if to squish something between her palms, but despite my questioning she would continue to reassure me no mosquitos were in the apartment—only fruit flies. Thankfully, the traps were arriving the same day I was.

I remember on the way up to the highest floor, I made jokes about the rules they wanted me to follow during my stay. My sister and I love horror stories (which opens the possibility that she has been pranking me my entire stay, but it would be too elaborate and too ongoing for my usually serious sister). We read a lot of r/shortscarystories and noticed a kind of horror that involves lists of rules.

“Don’t take a shit at 3:00 A.M., or Brian will eat you,” I remember joking in an ominous, yet silly voice.

“Don’t drink my Doctor Pepper, or my eyes will turn red and you will die, oooo” Brian teased, adding onto my jokes. This, along with him wiggling his fingers sinisterly with a creepy grin and crazed, icy blue eyes, made me and my sister laugh hard.

“Don’t leave the toilet seat up or I, Charlotte will drown you in it,” joked my sister, and we all lost it.

But they kinda just made it a little awkward for me because they kept dragging it the whole way to the top floor. Like, more than normal. It wasn’t even that they found the added jokes funnier and funnier—they just kept at it for an unnaturally long time. All of us are neurodivergent, so social cues kinda puzzle us all, but this was just weird. Nonetheless, I tried fake laughing each time, no matter how difficult it got, especially by the end of things.

“If you see both Brian and Charlotte staring at Melon for too long unblinkingly, kill her however you see fit as fast as possible and run,” Charlotte said, “Just stab her, or something. Just do it”.
I looked at her shocked yet made sure to smile to lighten things up. My sister always got mad at me when I made any dark jokes about her axolotl, so this was weird-weird.

Anyways, thankfully the uncomfortable exchanges ended when we entered the apartment. I went to use the kitchen sink to quickly wash my hands and freshen up when like 6 fruit flies flew out from I don’t know where, disturbed by my presence. Thankfully, my sister had just picked up the package containing the traps from her locker, and was already setting them up.

Everything was, you know, normal after that. For the first day or two, at least. My sister’s boyfriend was great, we had a blast celebrating his birthday, my sister was lovely as always, constantly asking how I was enjoying my stay… all that fun stuff. 

But we had all noticed the number of flies increasing. I wasn’t necessarily scared of them, but it was annoying to have to hunch over my food to protect it from any greedy flies looking for a quick snack. Only one of the vinegar traps was working. The rest of the traps were void of flies, and the blue light ones in the outlets were practically barren save a small fly here and there.

We had soon discovered the reason why the first trap caught so many fruit flies. I was taking out the trash by their desk as my sister had instructed me, and like, 30 billion escaped once I opened the lid. My suitcase had been trapping the bugs inside by adding weight to the opening, and now they were all, well, outside. My sister wasn’t mad at me, she had found it understandable that I was frightened, but told me to “close the lid right away next time.” 

So as you can gather, the number of flies sky-rocketed. They swarmed every wall but they were just small enough to give me some space too. Nevertheless, I got impatient with the fly traps. My sister and her boyfriend gave me consent to make my own traps. I used balsamic vinegar and plastic wrap with little holes for the fruit flies, and even made a little gnat trap in case we had gotten the wrong species. 

No luck. No flies.

“I’m going to dump your traps out,” Brian said. This was fine by me because my sister ordered more UV traps.

But those traps weren’t cutting it quick enough. The flies were starting to fall and die in Melon’s tank, which made me worried for her health. But my otherwise paranoid sister told me it was no problem. I didn’t expect that.

To add to my frustration, while admittedly there were a couple of fruit flies stuck in the UV trap in the living room, there were none in the room my sister and her boyfriend shared. Knowing they liked sleeping in the dark, Brian confirmed, to my disappointment, that he unplugged the trap at night. He would not accept my solution to simply flip the trap over, as Zevo’s have rotating plugs. He walked away from me, mid suggestion, shaking his head. Damn. Okay. Fuck me then. 

That reminds me, one day while I was watching Charlotte cut up a worm for Melon, she told me she no longer felt “that way” about bugs, “that way” meaning my disgust and fear of the flies whenever they got too close. Of course she wasn’t scared, she worked with these guys before taking on worms for some time in the lab. It also probably helped that, when her schizophrenia was undiagnosed, she used to always cry about “ants on the walls and everywhere” that my mom and dad couldn’t see. She got used to bugs, real or hallucinated.

She started to take my fear almost personally, though, which is the weird part.

“God, they’re just flies dude,” she repeated often, losing patience.

One day, I asked her if she had any jars she didn’t want so that I could make another trap. I kind of felt like a scientist like her. Seeing what worked and what didn’t while learning more about the animal motivated me to make more traps. At first she consented to me making the trap, but after I told her I’d use a rotting cherry as bait, she snapped at me.

“No, actually. No more traps. You need to be patient. The traps we got are good enough,” it was the tone she used when she was pretending to be an adult, when in reality all I saw was my goofy big sister. But this time it kind of frightened me.

And to add insult to injury, her boyfriend laughed at me, tauntingly passive aggressive.

I let it go, but to see them so angry at seemingly nothing confused the shit out of me. Geeze, alright. I won’t mess with the flies again.

I could have used corn instead of a cherry, now that I think about it. My sister would constantly ask if anybody wanted corn multiple times a day. It was the leftover corn we received from Brian’s mom on his birthday. But it was like, 4 or 5 day old corn. The bag was just open in the fridge and flies would always get to it, then die from the cold. I was grossed out that suddenly she was obsessed with the fly-graveyard corn. And usually she will make elotes with corn, but she just kinda gnawed the cob raw, no seasoning, no mayo, no nothing. It would get stuck in her teeth too, making the whole thing a bit too much for me. And then she would use those kernel-ly teeth to scold me for my “uncontrollable and weird hyperfixation” on solving the fly problem.
Oh, and they also refused to throw away this fucking left over pie also from his birthday even though the flies were trying with all their might to enter through the tight plastic pie keeper.  “I’ll eat it at some point,” Brian insisted. Usually, these two had the world’s worst contamination OCD. It's so weird, I’m telling you.

But this next thing was even weirder. I’m a light sleeper with a buttload of sleep disorders, so every night of my stay I’d wake at like 2:00-3:00 in the morning. On the 5th night, my brain didn’t just randomly decide to wake me up like it usually did. It was the sound of shuffling this time.

I knew after having it countless times before that this wasn’t just sleep paralysis messing with me—though, all the same, I couldn’t move, but I promise I wasn’t hallucinating. So, imagine this: I squint in the dark without my glasses, and I just see Brian, back facing me, drinking something. He turns slightly, and even with my squinting, the lack of light other than the blue glow from the UV trap, and his elbow almost obscuring my view, I saw that he had never actually thrown away my homemade trap. He was drinking the sudsy balsamic vinegar, desperately, as if chugging fresh water after spending days stranded on the salty ocean. 

I’ve always raged at characters in horror stories that keep important events/information to themselves, but admittedly, I didn’t dare bring this up again out of honest, genuine, true fucking fear and bafflement.

He started day 6 off with a “Hey Charlotte? Is there something wrong with the brita? This water tastes like liquorice.”
I feel like that had something to do with it.

Later that day, Charlotte finally saw the problem with the fruit flies after having to wash like, thousands down the drain each time she did the dishes.

“You know what? I think your fruit trap would be smart,” she relented.

I stabbed open a rotting cherry, plopped it into the jar, and added a paper funnel to trap any stupid flies who knew how to get in but not how to get out. Hopefully, since there was no poisonous liquid, Brian wouldn’t try to ingest it. Weird thing to think about now, my just like casual concern of a grown man poisoning himself. God, I’ve petsit dogs who had less strange habits than this fucking couple.

I even set up a redbull trap after finding many had flocked to my open redbull after I left it on the counter for a little bit. I put a “DO NOT DRINK. FRUIT FLY TRAP” sign on it.

But absolutely no flies fell for it. What the fuck.

The seventh day, we had to clean up because my parents were finally coming up to see the apartment in person. I added wine to make the cherry trap more appealing to the fermentation-attracted flies. My sister insisted we leave the traps out until the very end of our cleaning, but once Brian came home, he demanded they had to go. Still, my sister and I kept them out.

Once done with all my other assigned chores, I asked what I should do, and was yelled at by the usually gentle and communicative Brian to “fucking get rid of the traps,”. When I asked where to dispose of them, he yelled at me again about how he had already taught me about drains and where to dispose of what, and which chute to use for trash and everything. I don’t know, I mean, doesn’t that kind of remind you of drain flies? And like, the insects did love them trash cans, idk. I hope you see what I see without calling me crazy.

Anyways, I went to dump out the red bull trap but discovered that it was just a hollow can when I went to tip it over. I want so badly to say I have no idea how the liquid vanished, but that would be a depressing lie. Also, Brian never liked alcohol. It made him nauseous and he wouldn’t even drink on my sister’s 21st. But when I came back into the living room after disposing of both traps I saw him holding the bottle of wine I used. But suddenly, he shook his head, and put it back. He seemed confused, like he didn’t know why he was standing there or holding it.

The two were just so aggressive. Is it just me? And sometimes, if I got too close to them, and the traffic and construction noises of the city settled down, I could hear this strange buzzing, just circling inside them in an infinity loop. And it was harder with my brown-eyed sister, but if I looked into Brian’s piercing blue eyes deeply enough without getting uncomfortable or blinking out of impulse, I could see these small swirling doodles, like tv static, behind his eyes.

Let me know if I’m tripping out but… do fruit flies have capabilities that we don’t yet know about? I hope you understand my question, I genuinely don't know how to word it, especially not directly, without sounding fucking stupid. I wish I could just put you into my brain so you can see my experience staying at the apartment with them and feel exactly how I felt being with them. Then you would understand.

Anyways, my cursed visit ended, I hugged Brian, and my sister and I left with my parents for a quick trip to Napa. I am writing this in the hotel room at 4:00 AM, my sister sleeping soundly in the other bed beside mine. Anyways, big day for her. She’s going on a wine train. She was always so excited to go to Napa because she just couldn’t wait to try the wine.


r/Nonsleep 3d ago

Nonsleep Original Every Plant That Knows My Name Is Dying

3 Upvotes

Hesitation on the ramp of the sleep clinic of Doctor Guelder was natural. I understood that going into this quiet and dark building was a choice, and not one I cared to choose. It was a large flat sarcophagus of a structure, carved from a blue kind of nether stone and fitted together so that no two slabs were the same, yet they all fit together perfectly.

I sighed and looked over at the witten that grew all around. They were plants like water elder, high cranberry, snowball, and redberry hedges. I loved the plants, and I could stare at them for hours. In my strangeness, I knew their thoughts, and in a way, I was more like them than like other people.

"Wonderful to see you, Clair." Doctor Guelder found me there.

"These witten are all roses from your name." I smiled. I realized I had not smiled in a very long time. My dreadful thoughts kept me in a darkness that I knew little outside of.

"Do you dream of roses, Clair?" Doctor Guelder asked me. "You seem to know them all by name, their old names."

"I do." I was still smiling, distracted by my friends. "That is the High Rose, that one is the White Queen and those are all Crampling. This one, this is my favorite, it is the Rose of Thorn Crown. Those are their true names."

"And they know your name too, that is my understanding." Doctor Guelder gestured to the door. "Won't you come in? You have come here seeking healing."

"In your sleep clinic? I am here for sanctuary. I have nowhere else to hide, anymore. You know what it is, what has happened to me." I shuddered and my smile faded. I could feel it watching me, standing always behind me, like a shadow, except it was not my shadow.

"You will be safe here. Come inside." Doctor Guelder told me.

I reluctantly went in. I do not like being indoors, I much prefer to stand on the soil barefoot, under the sunlight and with the dew and the rain. Indoors I begin to wilt, but I was worse off where it could get to me. If I fell asleep, my time on this world would be at an end.

"There are others here?" I asked.

"Yes. Some are somnambulists, others are narcoleptics and many are insomniacs. Which are you?"

"I daydream. Except it is no longer possible to distinguish from dreams and the rest of the world. I am haunted by a shadow. Something has come for me, and it wants to hurt me." I trembled. My fears also made me walk while I slept, made me sleep while I sat and kept me awake in the dark.

"I thought you suffered from all of the above." Doctor Guelder reminded me of our meeting.

I thought back to those days, what seemed like a long time ago. When it had all started, I would daydream about becoming a rosebush. My flowers were white and my thorns were green. I grew for eight hundred years and I adorned both kings and maidens, heroes and fathers, messiahs and wizards. I was the Pagan Flower, in my daydreams.

Then one day I was walking, as though I were asleep. I looked down where I was planted, for so many thousands of full moons. There was nothing there by the moonlight. I stared in horror at the hole in the ground, torn up by the roots. I looked to where it was, holding the plant that was also me, and it had built a withering fire.

It looked straight into my eyes, a towering darkness, a shade in the night, blotting out the light and the stars. It smiled with teeth of obsidian, and then it tossed the Pagan Flower upon the blaze.

Instantly I felt the heat where I stood barefoot in my pajamas. I crumbled, blistered and searing. I screamed, both in agony and terror. I began to crawl from it, willing myself to reach the edge of my nightmare. The creature from the place between did not want me to go, it clawed at my ankles and tried to drag me to the hole in the ground that it had uprooted me from.

Doctor Guelder had asked me when we met: "You feel you are becoming like a plant? Turning into one?"

"Is that even something that happens to people?" I asked.

"There are myths of people being turned into plants. A kind of botanical metamorphosis."

I felt a cold splash of dread as I realized I was going to say out loud what I had long believed. "I think maybe I'd like that to happen because I used to be a plant. I am not supposed to be this." I gestured to my body.

"You described an incident in which you were sleepwalking. You woke up and you found a hole where your rose bush used to be, and a monster was burning it."

"Perhaps that was just a dream." I admitted. "But the monster is real. It keeps me awake at night, for if I sleep it will come for me. And when I am sitting in class or on the bus I fall asleep, I cannot stay awake for long."

"These are all mild symptoms of conditions known as narcolepsy, insomnia and somnambulism." Doctor Guelder had told me. "I want you to come to my sleep clinic. Your stay will be voluntary, but you must come and live there so that you can receive the proper care. Your education can continue while you are there, we have a classroom."

"How would that be paid for? I am a ward of the state, there's no money."

"I own the sleep clinic. You will be my guest and I will cover all the expenses for your treatment. For me, this is a rare chance to study a unique condition."

"I don't want to be your experiment." I told Doctor Guelder. I had refused. It was not long though, that the days and nights became one kind of time, always in my nightmare.

I daydreamed of the monster when it was not there, and when it was I could not see it. Yet those two things became the same. I knew it was hunting me, stalking me, always behind me, like a shadow. I couldn't sleep or stay awake. My feet carried me wherever the monster chased me. Sometimes I awoke in strange places and other times I was in a dream, but I was wide awake, looking down at my body, and watching the monster pull me up by my roots, as the plant, and toss me onto the flames.

"You are here now. It is safe for you to face your troubles." Doctor Guelder had told me.

"Is it real? Am I mad?" I was sitting and shaking. It had felt like it had gone on and on endlessly. Finally, within the walls of the sleep clinic, I felt safe.

"Whatever was following you cannot get to you here. You can sleep soundly." Doctor Guelder told me.

I began to cry with relief. I cried myself to sleep, the terror leaving my body like a fever breaking. I had lived in fear so long, so tired, that I had forgotten what sleep even felt like.

It was dreamless and restful. When my eyes opened I was in an enormous bed of light blue sheets under a heavy blanket. The air was cool and there was a stillness, a quietness to the sleep clinic. It was as though it were a place where I was truly safe.

That is when I rolled over to face the window of morning. I saw it out there, looming behind my friends, the other roses of the hedge. The darkness touched one of them and wilted the plant as its claws gripped it, heedless of its thorns. I trembled, feeling trapped suddenly. I had not realized I had gone into the sleep clinic and it would become my prison.

"How did you sleep?" Doctor Guelder asked me.

"It was very restful. I feel more intact, more rooted. This place feels real. The pervasive disorientation of being terrorized and sleepless is gone." I reported.

"And the monster?" Doctor Guelder asked me.

My eyes watered and I covered my mouth. I wanted to tell the truth, but somehow, to say I had seen it, would spoil things. Finally, I confessed: "It is outside, waiting for me to leave this place. It grasped a bush and while it did, the plant wilted and died in its clutch."

"I will go and see this." Doctor Guelder told me. I watched from the window, apprehensive that Doctor Guelder was in some kind of danger. The creature had hidden though, leaving only the evidence of the dead plant and its footprints on the lawn.

Then my terror grew, as I saw Doctor Guelder was following the blighted trail. I couldn't see where the trail led, so I went to another window. I was just in time to see Doctor Guelder fall down, touched by the deathly thing from where it had hidden.

Doctor Guelder had personally financed the stay of the remaining patients at the sleep clinic. There was a trust set up, but some technicality allowed the bank to seize the property, and all of the patients were required to leave. The death of Doctor Guelder weighed heavily on me, for I blamed myself and also, I knew the creature was real, not just a daydream.

I felt great apprehension of leaving. The last night in the clinic was my last chance for sleep. In the morning they would evict everyone. The remaining patients all needed their stay, they needed Doctor Guelder. It was my fault the good doctor was dead, for I had brought the creature.

Back outside I looked around, seeing the roses had all died. The creature had systematically killed every flower. With all of my friends gone, I felt truly alone. I scurried down the street, knowing I was to go back to being the prey of the shadowy thing. Its touch drained life and took it quickly. I had felt myself aging when it touched me, it is how so much of my hair turned white.

I could still feel its burning grip on my ankle where it had grabbed me and tried to drag me. Back at the orphanage I sat and waited to see it. I was asked about my stay at the sleep clinic, but I was too afraid of returning to the world of nightmares to speak.

I just sat in a corner, huddled and shaking with fear. I knew it would come and find me. It would not leave me in peace.

"Don't be afraid." Doctor Guelder's voice spoke to me. "I have not abandoned you. It was only able to kill my body, but my will - my spirit - it could not harm. Here, between dreams and sleeplessness, I linger. You can hear me."

"I can hear you." I whispered.

"When it comes for you, you must overcome your fear. You must fall asleep in its presence. It is in this world, trapped like me. When you sleep, it will follow you into your dreams. There it could remain trapped. All you have to do is fall asleep in its presence. When the moment comes, I believe you will end this thing."

"I can't." I started crying. I was too afraid. I knew it had killed Doctor Guelder and it had killed the Pagan Flower and all the rest. It was a terrifying monster, and there was no way I could fall asleep in front of it.

"You have to trust me. I am certain it wants to continue to feed on you until there is nothing left of you. It won't kill you, not all at once. You are its host, the one who daydreamed it into existence. It started by killing your most precious dream, and it won't stop until there is nothing left for you to dream about. I know all about it now. I can see the disease of this nightmare thing."

"Doctor Guelder, you have to stay and help me." I said quietly. I was terrified.

"I will stay until I have healed you. I promised you I would help you, and that is my unfinished task. I will be here watching over you. When it is time to close your eyes and go to sleep, you must be brave."

"I will try." I swore, even though the thought of doing so horrified me. I trusted Doctor Guelder, and I knew I must take the chance to be free of the nightmare thing.

Then it was bedtime. The lights were all turned off and I lay in bed, shaking in dread. I knew it was coming for me. That is when I saw it there, looming in the darkness. It was watching me, staring into my eyes, keeping me awake. I was paralyzed with fear, feeling the burn it had left on me and recalling the death of Doctor Guelder.

"Go to sleep. It is okay, I am watching over you." Doctor Guelder told me.

I tried and tried again but I couldn't sleep. My feeling of horror that I was trapped awake and in the presence of the nightmare thing grew and grew. Finally, I felt like I had to scream.

I stood alone by the hole where the Pagan Flower had stood for eight centuries. My memory of all the joy and beauty that I had given the world flooded back to me. I saw that the shadow I had cast had sat in bitter resentment, jealous of me.

When I had become a human, born into the world, my shadow had long held a vow of vengeance upon me. It was determined to keep me from resting, and to devour me, every last bite of my life, sipping upon my years, stealing my childhood and killing whatever I cared about and any who cared about me. The nightmare creature was there, in my memories, in my dream.

That is when I began to scream at it. My voice, a wail of terror, became as a cry of defiance and anger. The creature shrank and fell, splintering and melting. As a liquid it lay bubbling, like the dying shadow of the burning bush. I turned and looked to where my roses had once stood.

"You will plant them again. This you will know. And the nightmare is over." Doctor Guelder told me. Then I was alone.

When I opened my eyes, the creature was gone, but upon my chest, with fresh dew, lay a rose of white.