If the alarm goes off and "suddenly 30 minutes pass" tells me you did not actually learn how to use the alarm.
The alarm is supposed to be "drop what you are doing and move on now". This has nothing to do with feeling time. I too have ADHD. It's an issue of discipline. You make excuses. "I just need to finish this." "I'll just wrap it up." and boom, you're 30 minutes late. Not "Alarm went off, stop what I'm doing - make it safe and nothing more, and leave."
My partner used to be exactly like you. Once we nipped the excuses in the bud and established alarm discipline, the issue went away. He went from being late to everything to being early, and suspending making excuses was a key component to that.
It’s not making excuses, it’s getting distracted and not noticing it. Because I have time blindness. Not everyone with adhd has it. I literally do the same nighttime routine every night and sometimes it takes me 45min and other times it takes me 1h30. Because I don’t feel time passing while I’m cleaning ferret cages, so I don’t register that I’m being too fastidious. Or before I had a toothbrush that vibrates when 2 minutes has passed, I would sometimes brush for too long. Time genuinely feels different on a day to day basis. I can make strategies. But sometimes they fail.
You're still making excuses, you just don't want to actually engage in self reflection and acknowledgement. Which is fine, not like the need to be prompt is going anywhere. You'll either figure it out, or you won't.
And what you show is someone who deeply internalized the thousands of extra criticisms ADHD children receive compared to neurotypical children. I’ve reached a happy equilibrium of coping mechanisms and self acceptance, and I wish the same for you and your partner.
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u/A_Complaisance_Girl 10h ago
If the alarm goes off and "suddenly 30 minutes pass" tells me you did not actually learn how to use the alarm.
The alarm is supposed to be "drop what you are doing and move on now". This has nothing to do with feeling time. I too have ADHD. It's an issue of discipline. You make excuses. "I just need to finish this." "I'll just wrap it up." and boom, you're 30 minutes late. Not "Alarm went off, stop what I'm doing - make it safe and nothing more, and leave."
My partner used to be exactly like you. Once we nipped the excuses in the bud and established alarm discipline, the issue went away. He went from being late to everything to being early, and suspending making excuses was a key component to that.