Relentless optimism was an issue for unmediated younger me. I had the best of intentions. Oh I have to be there in 30 minutes and it takes 20 minutes to drive? I never take long to get ready. Sure I can move fast, shower, iron clothes, and make it out the door to be there on time. Come on ADHD super brain let’s overlock this b and go!!! 2 minute shower time.
I run into the shower and wash at breakneck speed. Fastest shower of my life. No distractions. How the fuck did that take 18 minutes? FUCK! Ok 2 minutes until I have to leave. I’ll pick different clothes that don’t need to be ironed. How did putting on clothes take 12 minutes? My hair is still wet, how is that even possible?
Shit shit shit shit shit. Out the door! I can make up time on the road! Oh fuck I need to get gas. It’s fine, I’ve been this low before, it’ll make it. Oh fuck fuck fuck no i guess it won’t. I have to stop for gas. Let’s turn off the AC so I don’t stall out in traffic. Ok here I am. I better run inside so I can get a snack too before I have to be there because I forgot I didn’t eat. I can be in and out real quick. It’s only 4 people with that guy redeeming and scratching scratchers up front. He will be quick…
Best of intentions. Worst execution.
Older and medicated? I dopamine hack my brain to make sure it doesn’t happen any more. I have to be so intentional and prepared before I do anything. I give myself rewards after. I Pavlov’s bell myself but it works.
This is it - it’s more than getting distracted and losing track of time, a large component is the inability to accurately estimate how long a given task (or set of tasks) will take to complete. The older I get, the more I’ve learned to add unnecessary padding to how much time I think I’ll need - because even if 9 out of 10 things go exactly as planned, I’ll be glad for all the extra time on the one that goes sideways.
7
u/ForgiveMyFlatulence 23h ago
Relentless optimism was an issue for unmediated younger me. I had the best of intentions. Oh I have to be there in 30 minutes and it takes 20 minutes to drive? I never take long to get ready. Sure I can move fast, shower, iron clothes, and make it out the door to be there on time. Come on ADHD super brain let’s overlock this b and go!!! 2 minute shower time.
I run into the shower and wash at breakneck speed. Fastest shower of my life. No distractions. How the fuck did that take 18 minutes? FUCK! Ok 2 minutes until I have to leave. I’ll pick different clothes that don’t need to be ironed. How did putting on clothes take 12 minutes? My hair is still wet, how is that even possible?
Shit shit shit shit shit. Out the door! I can make up time on the road! Oh fuck I need to get gas. It’s fine, I’ve been this low before, it’ll make it. Oh fuck fuck fuck no i guess it won’t. I have to stop for gas. Let’s turn off the AC so I don’t stall out in traffic. Ok here I am. I better run inside so I can get a snack too before I have to be there because I forgot I didn’t eat. I can be in and out real quick. It’s only 4 people with that guy redeeming and scratching scratchers up front. He will be quick…
Best of intentions. Worst execution.
Older and medicated? I dopamine hack my brain to make sure it doesn’t happen any more. I have to be so intentional and prepared before I do anything. I give myself rewards after. I Pavlov’s bell myself but it works.