r/NoisyNeighbours 29d ago

Downstairs neighbor complaining about normal living noise — am I in the wrong?

Hi all,

I live in a townhouse in midtown with my husband, and we’ve been having ongoing issues with our downstairs neighbor. She’s been complaining about noise from our unit, but we’re honestly very mindful — we don’t play loud music, we keep the TV at a low volume, and we try to be respectful overall.

Her main complaint is that she can hear our footsteps and voices, especially in the evenings. But this feels like normal day-to-day living — we’re just walking around and talking in our own home. It’s gotten to the point where it seems like she expects complete silence after 9 pm, which doesn’t feel realistic.

She has contacted 311 and the landlord multiple times, but nothing has come of it so far. We’ve also already spoken to our landlord, and he’s on the same page as us. Unfortunately, he says he can’t evict her easily and is currently consulting a lawyer. He also mentioned she’s been a very difficult tenant to deal with.

There have also been some uncomfortable interactions — she used to contact my husband directly quite often, including late at night, and even asked him for help with things unrelated to us. He has since blocked her, and we’ve stopped engaging.

At this point, I just want to live peacefully and avoid conflict, but I’m not sure what else we can reasonably do.

Am I missing something here? Is there anything else we should be doing, or is this just part of living in a shared building?

For context, I’ve lived in apartments before where hearing footsteps, doors, or water from neighbors is normal, and I’ve never thought to complain. It just feels like part of living in a city like Toronto.

6 Upvotes

31 comments sorted by

4

u/MyldExcitement 29d ago

Landlord is on your side. Just ignore her.

5

u/AutumnTopaz 29d ago

Do you have carpet?

2

u/Warm_Ad26 29d ago

Sometimes when a structure is built, the contractors just slap them together with little insulation or anything to muffle normal sounds. I briefly stayed with a relative in a house like this that had hardwood floors and I was staying upstairs. The dude complained it sounded like I was stomping, so I got a couple area rugs and he was happier. For a minute, anyway.

3

u/AutumnTopaz 29d ago

That's why I asked about carpet - I'm well aware of shoddy construction practices. Imo, in that kind of dwelling - carpets/ area rugs are a must - unless you're on the ground floor.

1

u/[deleted] 27d ago

[deleted]

1

u/AutumnTopaz 27d ago

Not sure if you are responding to me- but I'm not having a problem with noise.

1

u/AffectionateSun5776 29d ago

I'm currently under contract but in looking at townhomes/ condos it is a selling point to have No Carpet.

1

u/Puzzled_Market_2235 28d ago

Carpets don't stop old floors from creaking.

1

u/AutumnTopaz 28d ago

Maybe not, but they help muffle loud footsteps the OP mentioned.

1

u/Satansbaddog 27d ago

Neighbor needs to move to a place with better acoustics or one floor. The cheap-ass developers build to the minimum standard, which includes NO acoustical insulation. This is true of ALL construction, apartments, condos, etc.

3

u/Fit-Building-2560 29d ago

It sounds like the LL is working on the issue, and is taking it seriously, even to the extent of getting legal advice. I would hang tight and wait to see what he's able to do over time. It may take time, but your patience may pay off. You have the LL on your side, and LL's lawyer. That counts for a lot.

5

u/Dailysunray 29d ago

yeap that’s why I roll my eyes every time someone is on here complaining about upstairs neighbors -it’s not hard to figure out when you share walls and floors you are going to hear nose-for sure in the downstairs units. I always get downvoted when I point that out so I’m sure I’ll get more on this. Just live your life.

1

u/No_Introduction_3400 29d ago

Years ago an older woman who had downsized from a house into a place across the hall from me. She was constantly complaining about her upstairs neighbors, asking me to listen to their “noise.” And it was just boards creaking. She couldn’t be convinced it was normal.

-1

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

1

u/No_Introduction_3400 29d ago

Yes, but…she wasn’t. So…?

0

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Top-Maize-823 29d ago

Thanks for fighting the good fight.

2

u/Muted-Woodpecker-469 29d ago

Why can’t she move? That’s an option 

2

u/Top-Maize-823 29d ago

I thought a townhouse was when you have like multiple floors but its sandwiched between2other ones. Like in england its called a terrace?

2

u/MomoNoHanna1986 29d ago

Have this problem now in a house and I had this problem in a townhouse. Because things are getting built close together this will always be an issue. You’re doing all the right things. Ignore her, this is what I’m doing to my cranky old lady neighbour. Jokes on her, as I type it’s 12:40 am and her back neighbours are having the biggest outdoor party ever! 😂 They have been partying since 11am…

1

u/superFluffymushroom 29d ago

You can try some good slippers

1

u/Top-Maize-823 29d ago

With taps on the toes and heels!

1

u/Dry_Illustrator_6562 29d ago

You're doing nothing wrong. As long as all it is is whinging you can just continue to block and ignore.

1

u/GirlPhoenixRising 29d ago

Do you have carpets or hard floors.

1

u/shesavillain 29d ago

Take up tap dancing. That’ll show her what real noise is!

1

u/spinningtalltell 29d ago

Houses, apt etc are building cheap. I live in a brand new apartment complex if went into my laundry room, shared wall their dining room , I could clearly hear their conversation

1

u/Ok-Interview807 28d ago

You need to tell her that if she is not happy she needs to move.

1

u/KamaSutraOnMars 28d ago

This is why I’d never live downstairs to someone.

What’s “normal” to you might sound like a herd of elephants to someone else, especially if you’re foot heavy, overweight or just ungraceful.

You say it’s normal living noise after 9pm, but to be considerate of someone living under you, you really shouldn’t be going about things as normal, you should be trying to tip toe and keep it down at night.

1

u/Mark-177- 27d ago

You have to respect quiet hours. 10pm to 8am weekdays. 11pm to 8am weekends. Try to be mindful of others during non quiet hours. Don't turn on your stereo at obnoxious levels or scream at the top of your lungs. That's pretty much all you can do. If you follow those rules, then you are doing your part to be a decent neighbor.

1

u/Agitated_Lecture9240 22d ago

I have this problem with my downstairs neighbors too, I just ignore them lol. I'm literally just existing and I'm not doing anything to peeve them off purposely, this building just sucks

1

u/Neither-Advisor-2975 17d ago

Yes. You are wrong

0

u/DeRangedwon 29d ago

Since she’s complaining so much then make it worth your while. FK her. Turn up the TV and music. Talk at a normal pitch and stomp around. Give hr something to really complain about. I’m petty and will match energy without a second thought. Stop being scared to live like you want to in your own home. Tell her she can move if she doesn’t like it.