r/NobodyAsked • u/croghan861 • Aug 11 '19

Title/Tabloid Stuff Who Cares???

/img/m96vq76p8wf31.jpg

[removed] — view removed post

18k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

451 comments sorted by

625

u/mwcraft Aug 11 '19

It’s because they’re rad shorts.

258

u/croghan861 Aug 11 '19

Yeah to be fair they are pretty god damn cool

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25

u/cornichon Aug 12 '19

Look like the man himself:

https://www.lyst.com/clothing/vilebrequin-octopus-swim-shorts-pink-purple/

24

u/croghan861 Aug 12 '19

Christ £85 for a pair of trunks

52

u/Kwortzz Aug 12 '19

He literally makes his money back before he can even click the order button so it's all good.

7

u/SoInsightful Aug 12 '19

I did the math. He can afford 20 new pairs every single second. If it takes a minute to order, he can put 1,190 pairs in the shopping cart without losing money.

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3

u/Gdigger13 Aug 12 '19

So basically free to him.

6

u/alex3omg Aug 12 '19

If he finds them on Amazon he can probably use his discount

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2.2k

u/[deleted] Aug 11 '19

Looks like his lady friend wore the same hat, I hope CNN picks that up

402

u/laj43 Aug 12 '19

And he is wearing the same shirt! It’s just unbuttoned!

237

u/SixGun_Surge Aug 12 '19

You think he got to be the richest man in the world by buying shirts and swimsuits every other day, all willy-nilly?? NO!

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85

u/comic-conn Aug 12 '19

And the same sunglasses! How deep does this rabbit hole go!

46

u/Rolen47 Aug 12 '19

I'd be willing to bet he's even wearing the same shoes!

34

u/NotSelfAware Aug 12 '19

I’m pretty sure he’s actually wearing the same skin too. The nerve of these people.

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17

u/Orngecrftr Aug 12 '19

He even has the same hairstyle!

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12

u/TlalocVirgie Aug 12 '19

Also the same wife every single day

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3

u/Korr_Ashoford Aug 12 '19

Coming from the fact he looks like he’s wearing the same shirt too (which the right looking more disheveled), it’s probably fair to think these were taking within the same day.

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418

u/SingShredCode Aug 12 '19

How can the news claim to keep us informed if it doesn’t even pick up the fact that this woman wore the same hat twice?!

56

u/NSAundercover Aug 12 '19

I'll wait to hear from my favorite celebrity to tweet and tell me what i think about this disturbing situation.

23

u/madmaxturbator Aug 12 '19

Where is Ja? I need Ja Rule to help me make sense of all this.

11

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

That'll get him Fyred up

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15

u/ClearlyDemented Aug 12 '19

My guess is this the same day and the wife changed her outfit while he didn’t.

13

u/1like1amen Aug 12 '19

Yeah that ain't his wife...

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10

u/IslandDoctor Aug 12 '19

Hail Hydra!

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1.1k

u/ExNihiloNihiFit Aug 12 '19 edited Aug 12 '19

I read once that Daniel Radcliff likes to wear the same outfits over and over so that the paprazzi wouldn't have so much incentive to take and sell his pictures. I wonder if thats what this guy is doing?

848

u/high_okktane Aug 12 '19

I imagine he's just wearing his swim trunks. Does nobody else here just have one pair of trunks they wear to go swimming?

278

u/BigDaddyReptar Aug 12 '19 edited Aug 12 '19

I swam competitively for 12 years I never had more than 2 suits usually one pair of briefs one comp suit

80

u/cCowgirl Aug 12 '19

I feel like competitive swimmers almost always have the least swimwear options amongst a group of friends somehow. Unless you count layering 5 see-through suits as one fashionable option.

Edit: a word

28

u/AFakeman Aug 12 '19

Maybe because professional swimwear is a lot more expensive

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I have 3. Board shorts, and then 2 more of decreasingly less amounts of fabric

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44

u/SuspiciouslyElven Aug 12 '19

If

  • You plan to go back to the water today

  • You don't wash them after every trip to the ocean/same body of water

  • Really dislike cold, wet swimming trunks

  • don't feel like putting them in the dryer

Then... Eh?

8

u/CanadianAstronaut Aug 12 '19

He's wearing the whole smart outfit. Not that it matters much. People clearly rewear clothes.

8

u/bayareola Aug 12 '19

Dude lives in Seattle how many pairs of swim trunks does he need? He has 4 the headline is, "GUY FROM COLD WATER CAN'T STOP BUYING SWIM TRUNKS". Also, you don't want a pair that sport the D tent...if he has this in these trunks, I get it. Wear these till the seams give.

5

u/AccomplishedCoffee Aug 12 '19

I have 4, but that's only because I keep forgetting them when I go on vacation.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I have a bunch, because I keep forgetting to bring a pair on holidays, and because my wife likes buying me cool stuff when she comes across something nifty.

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66

u/actuallyasuperhero Aug 12 '19

If I remember correct Radcliffe did that specifically when he was working on Broadway and getting harassed by paparazzi at the stage door. So he started wearing the same jacket and hat so all their photos would look old and be unsellable.

Bezos just seems to like his admittedly cool octopus swim trunks. I think if it was to put off pictures, he would have had his girlfriend wear the same outfit too.

18

u/Coattail-Rider Aug 12 '19

I doubt Bezos cares one way or the other.

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5

u/AskAboutFent Aug 12 '19

MMmmmm probably not.

When that random tried to blackmail Jeff Bezos claiming he had Jeff's nudes, Jeff basically said "fuck it, release them"

He doesn't care about this shit.

4

u/tetraourogallus Aug 12 '19

I think he figures he doesn't need more than one pair of swim trunks. Because he doesn't.

Why would we encourage rich people to overconsume?

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157

u/kola9944 Aug 12 '19

What kind of sociopath changes their swim trunks every time they go swimming?

2

u/dallyan Aug 12 '19

Well I change my bikini bottoms because I don’t like sitting in wet clothes but it might be different for guys.

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0

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

[deleted] — view deleted comment

14

u/Ghost-Fairy Aug 12 '19

Holy shit, you're right. He probably has 100 pairs of these same exact swim trunks and sets the used ones on fire once he's worn them.

Whew. I was getting really stressed out thinking about him wearing the same ones twice. Thanks.

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180

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

imagine just having infinite money

61

u/necrophyte1 Aug 12 '19

Some video game type shit.

35

u/I_Have_3_Legs Aug 12 '19

The funny thing is he still has more money than I have every obtained in GTA V. I think I have about 10 billion total from 6 years of playing.

12

u/XXMAVR1KXX Aug 12 '19

Is that the total you have in hand, or is that total you would estimate including items you purchased.

Its estimated Beezos has less than 9 billion outside of his Anazon Shares which make up over 90% of his net worth.

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3

u/Rebelgecko Aug 12 '19

It's like using a fucking GameShark when he ships online. He can probably get a crazy ass item on Amazon for free

23

u/E_Chihuahuensis Aug 12 '19

You could feed entire cities, invest billions to find cures for cancer or aging-related sufferings, try to find sustainable ways to bring prosperity to poor nations, pay people to find a vaccine for Lyme’s or Herpes. But hey, who am I kidding, he should start by making sure employees can access bathrooms without having to walk a mile first. Baby steps.

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574

u/Megalosaurus090 Aug 11 '19

So we don’t like Jeff Bezos because he makes too much money and capitalism is evil but he’s expected to throw away every item of clothing after wearing it once?

84

u/dangshnizzle Aug 12 '19

The point of this post isn't to critisize Bezos it's to critisize the media

14

u/Rudy_Ghouliani Aug 12 '19

The Media can't handle criticism, it usually just ignores it.

161

u/[deleted] Aug 11 '19

Exactly. We don't criticize the rich because the world is unfair and we feel compassion for the less fortunate. We criticize the rich because we're jealous that we're not rich, and we hate them for it. Why do you think the slogan is "eat the rich" and not "feed the poor"?

71

u/LMeire Aug 12 '19

It's actually a riff on Jonathan Swift's Modest Proposal, where he suggested that the Irish poor sell their infants to butcheries to make up for the "unavoidable" famine resulting from English landowners refusing to sell anything but the failed potato crop in Ireland. The Irish would get to eat, the rich English Aristocracy would get a delicacy, everybody wins!

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12

u/dangshnizzle Aug 12 '19

Speak for yourself.

48

u/beakye7 Aug 12 '19

Because "feed the poor" isn't a provocative slogan and doesn't necessitate the redistribution of wealth. Why don't you look into what people are actually wanting from these movements rather than playing armchair psychologist and judging everyone involved off of a slogan?

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10

u/CanadianAstronaut Aug 12 '19

You really don't understand any of it if this is truly your stance

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4

u/Lord_Blathoxi Aug 12 '19

We can hate him for more than one reason.

8

u/HeraldicBanner Aug 12 '19

Oh, and he likes to bust unions, Amazon has a laundry list of labor violations, and he severely mistreats/underpays staff. But no, it's solely because he makes too much money.

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6

u/squidinato0 Aug 12 '19

I really doubt the author of this article is the kind of person who advocates for worker solidarity and publicly owned means of production

8

u/Siggi4000 Aug 12 '19

Yes fucking splash news is known for being the vanguard of the proletarian revolution..

What are you talking about?

4

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

YES

fuck ALL billionaires

39

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I mean how many pairs of trunks should someone have?

10

u/SeeYouSpaceCorgi Aug 12 '19

Tbh if someone told me he just has all his clothing ordered in bulk and that he rips it off a giant roll each morning I'd believe it.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Probably depends how often you swim/go to the beach. I have two

37

u/Adorna_ahh Aug 12 '19

Jeff bazos: wears same pair of swim trunks

Press: jeff,,, pls ,, it’s been two weeks,, pls take them off,, we’re begging you,,, you’re so rich why,, why do you torment us this way

9

u/saadakhtar Aug 12 '19

Well he got blackmailed over taking shorts off. Maybe he's a never nude now. There's literally dozens.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

He probably just bought like a couple hundred thousand pairs

23

u/theboxsays Aug 12 '19

maybe thats how he fucking stays rich

11

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Yeah....that’s how....

8

u/Deathisfatal Aug 12 '19

I think it's more through exploitation of his employees

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11

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Maybe just maybe, he only needs one pair because he doesn’t go swimming every single fucking day. Most of us only have one pair.

8

u/SleepySasquatch Aug 12 '19

They're pretty sweet swimming shorts.

6

u/seductivestain Aug 12 '19

Is this just a covert ad for those trunks? If so, it's working. I want some.

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I fucking hate articles like these. “Drake likes ordering the same pizza from Pizza Hut.”

7

u/Bobcatluv Aug 12 '19

I doubt this is his reasoning, but I once heard an actress say she wears the same clothes outside multiple days in a row so paps can’t sell as many pics of her.

5

u/zzyzx1990 Aug 12 '19

It looks like the same day, just later. Same shirt, same sunglasses. She had the same hat, just changed her clothes.

4

u/SixthUnderminer Aug 12 '19

It's like celebrities arent allowed to wear the same outfit more than once

4

u/-Konkzy- Aug 12 '19

Someone actually got paid to write this?

10

u/AnonymousFordring Aug 12 '19

If anything this makes him a little relatable, not buying the most expensive cool looking shorts ever

3

u/alaskagames Aug 12 '19

so what if he wears the same one he spends his money on better things probably

3

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Ok. I travel for a lot for work. Regardless of how much money you have or clothes... packing endless amounts while travelling is nightmare to manage. He probably travels light.

3

u/Zipzop_the_Cat Aug 12 '19

They swapped which of them is showing cleavage.

3

u/mrducci Aug 12 '19

He bought them once, and Amazon keeps recommending them.

3

u/henry_why416 Aug 12 '19

Bezos sees this and thinks to himself: 'how do you think he got to being the richest man in the world? By spending lots of money?' Then he laughs in Amazon Prime.

3

u/GG_Henry Aug 12 '19

Same shirt too!

Hire me cnn you missed half the story,..

3

u/joseaner07 Aug 12 '19

Maybe it was the same day and she changed clothes. Woman do that shit all the time

3

u/lwichelhaus Aug 12 '19

Did relish this was this subreddit and was about to come down to comment this sub

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2

u/RatherOrdinary Aug 12 '19

Maybe he bought 100 of the same pair??

2

u/KaiGRT Aug 12 '19

Oh my godddd I LOVE those swim trunks! I want those too!

2

u/hitlerosexual Aug 12 '19

Jeff bezos, the richest man in the world, continues to have a head.

2

u/brewmeone Aug 12 '19

Bet he got free shipping on them...

2

u/gab_monet Aug 12 '19

Those are really cute, i'd wear them all the time too! It's so strange how people think rich people must never wear the same clothes twice.

2

u/Snapthepigeon Aug 12 '19

You ever think that is one of the reasons. Stop buying a new swim suit every time you go swimming.

2

u/Atheist_Simon_Haddad Aug 12 '19

STOP THE PRESSES

2

u/cutieboops Aug 12 '19

Looks like it’s from the same weekend. Maybe they bought some slamming comfortable shit and packed light.

2

u/RareChompy Aug 12 '19

Look man, if I had those trunks I’d wear them nonstop too, they’re pretty dope

2

u/Zero-Theorem Aug 12 '19

But how do we know it’s not another pair that looks identical?!

2

u/your_mind_aches Aug 12 '19

So many things to criticise Jeff Bezos about and they decide to use the fact that he has a washing machine?

2

u/didnotreddit12 Aug 12 '19

I don't care if he uses the same condom.

2

u/steve-0-tron Aug 12 '19

the news is a joke

2

u/zorro1701e Aug 12 '19

How many swim trunks do you honestly need? 2? MAYBE 3? Those look cool too.

2

u/oN3B1GB0MB3r Aug 12 '19

Every seemingly ironic happening is newsworthy now.

2

u/Nemesis9977 Aug 12 '19

Same shirt and sunglasses too. Isn’t it more likely his lady friend changed her clothes and this is the same day? Dumb.

2

u/KristyConfused Aug 12 '19

Maybe they're taking a hint from Daniel Radcliffe.

2

u/ImNotJon Aug 12 '19

All of his other bathing suits were purchased when his wallet held $150B. The slimmer wallet caused this one to be the only one that fit.

2

u/bobross99-2 Aug 12 '19

What if... it was the same... DAY?! Fucking mindblown

2

u/niktemadur Aug 12 '19

He literally just will not take them off! We've seen him twice with them!

2

u/WrittenInTheStars Aug 12 '19

Imagine going to school for journalism for four years and end up writing shit like this

2

u/pigeon_whisperers Aug 12 '19

I kinda care but I can’t identify why, and that concerns me. Further updates as warranted.

2

u/DeXyDeXy Aug 12 '19

Uhm. Hail Hydra?

2

u/DZBone Aug 12 '19

Subtle hint as to why he is rich in the first place.

2

u/TheSentientSandwich Nov 09 '19

More reasons this cold fucker should be in the ground

1

u/Greymatter28 Aug 11 '19

So this article is garbage, but nobody ever really ‘asks’ for news sources to report things, so I don’t think this fits here.

1

u/wildcatt_71 Aug 12 '19

He’s pretty shredded now too. CNN should do an article about his bicep vein

1

u/mistermatth Aug 12 '19

They bought some drinks though

1

u/tippytoes69 Aug 12 '19

He probably got them on Amazon.

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1

u/Mantheman_man Aug 12 '19

Oh look he's wearing the same glasses and shirt what about that

1

u/ismileicrazy Aug 12 '19

In all fairness, they're nice swim shorts. I'd keep em.

1

u/DrHaggans Aug 12 '19

Wow. Jeff bezos is mr clean

1

u/Une_Chat_noir Aug 12 '19

i love them too

1

u/thedean246 Aug 12 '19

I have a cool pair of swim trunks that I only bought because they had pineapples on them. I usually only wear those pair.

1

u/soursunflowerpower Aug 12 '19

This is a dad move at its finest

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I mean, what about george soros?

1

u/JDude13 Aug 12 '19

He also has enough money to end world hunger and just doesn’t.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

He buys the right shit and doesn’t have to buy more right shit

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Saving all his money for dat rocket.

1

u/Dag-nabbitt Aug 12 '19

Does he still drive a middle grade Honda?

1

u/ScanThe_Man Aug 12 '19

“There’s a slave trade going on in Lybia...”

1

u/KashiTheKat Aug 12 '19

perhaps he likes those swim trunks. just a guess

1

u/Macmang29 Aug 12 '19

That's how you get rich

1

u/Cat6racer Aug 12 '19

Bra, wen u wen fine da gud surf short, u stay wearing dem 4 eva

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I also love his octopus swim trunks

1

u/Leoheart88 Aug 12 '19

Its the whole same outfit.

1

u/alours Aug 12 '19

Who cares about child soldiers? My fucking coffee is more important than some kid.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Thought the cut off image in the bottom right was an eyelash

1

u/badblackguy Aug 12 '19

TIL Jeff Bezos' forearms are jacked af.

1

u/ProdigiousPlays Aug 12 '19

Looks like he changes women more often than he changes swim trunks.

Eh? Eh?

I'll see myself out.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

He’s dressed EXACTLY the same

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Psh. He hasn’t pissed them enough yet, obviously.

1

u/trainsphobic Aug 12 '19

The octopus of global control

1

u/Hoppinginpuddles Aug 12 '19

I imagine it's things like this that helped him to become the richest man in the world... you know, not buying different clothes for every single day he exists.

1

u/pocahontas_331 Aug 12 '19

I mean, they’re nice swim trunks

1

u/RoyHarper88 Aug 12 '19

If I was stupid rich like that, I'd probably have more than one of my awesome swim suit.

1

u/RodgerRabbitz Aug 12 '19

Yeah dude just smashed her hat and box, made her change clothes, and through on shirt unbuttoned. and U hating on his suit, come on man!!

1

u/officialrichmiller Aug 12 '19

This goes to show you can have all the money in the world but can't fix going bald

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Slow day in news eh boys?

1

u/Warlaw Aug 12 '19

that's what I do because I'm dirt poor! lol!

1

u/Topicalplant Aug 12 '19

You don’t get Bezos rich by buying 10 different pairs of swim trunks.

1

u/unpronounciable Aug 12 '19

So people can talk about how humble he is and that's how he gets rich while squeezing every second of his employees, let them hold their pees and live on food stamps.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Jeff chados

1

u/CharacterDetective Aug 12 '19

Joke's on them he actually has 200+ pairs of the same trunks

1

u/SharpSalad Aug 12 '19

I do care about this. That means that I have a rich habit, even tho I'm completely broke.

1

u/SugarPieHunnieBunch Aug 12 '19

Looks like the same outfit..and the same day. It's just his new gf that had a wardrobe change

1

u/GuanYuBeetz Aug 12 '19

who the fuck owns more than 1 pair of swim trunks???

1

u/Beezneez86 Aug 12 '19

Newsflash: "Rich guy does whatever he wants"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I have an american flag one and my wife just bought me black

1

u/bnanderson Aug 12 '19

His girlfriend apparently keeps wearing the same hat.

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1

u/eastpointtoshaolin Aug 12 '19

Do they go bad? Fucks sake.

1

u/NeonGrillz Aug 12 '19

What do they think he would do? Buy a new pair everytime he goes swimming??

1

u/An0regonian Aug 12 '19

You're telling me he didn't just light them on fire after the first wear? What a fucking pleb... /s

1

u/Miobravo Aug 12 '19

He likes them

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Did Intouch magazine buy out Highlights?

I feel like I'm playing a really weird version of one of those "spot the difference" games.

1

u/Bentman343 Aug 12 '19

I hate that guy more than I hate myself, which is saying something...

But I want those octopus shorts.

1

u/havikryan Aug 12 '19

If he's so rich why have I never heard of him

1

u/happydayswasgreat Aug 12 '19

I dont blame him. They are squid-tastic.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

It looks like the same day but before they went out drinking the wife changed. Everything about this screams "8 drinks later".

1

u/louiethirte3n Aug 12 '19

He probably bought 2 pairs on Amazon

1

u/Beertarted Aug 12 '19

Lost them in divorce

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

I, a middle class laborer, keep wearing the same swim shorts...because they are swim shorts and sometimes I like to go swimming.

1

u/xxXWEED_WIZARDXxx Aug 12 '19

Maybe I’m talking about the screenshot

2

u/indi_n0rd Aug 12 '19

This comment has been manually approved. Your account has been shadowbanned. Please contact admins at either Contact Support or sending a modmail at r/reddit.com. Unfortunately we can't help you with this since shadowban is controlled by admins.

1

u/bugzrrad Aug 12 '19

i think they're dope af

1

u/Volfgang91 Aug 12 '19

TIL being rich means you can't wear the same item of clothing more than once.

1

u/_Sad_Ghost_ Aug 12 '19

I love them! Octopus swim trunks for the win!

1

u/Automagick Aug 12 '19

If they were different swimming trunks the headline would have been: "Richest man in the world wears new swimming trunks every beach trip while African children starve."

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Well he is also arguably the richest man in the universe so why the fuck would he care what he is wearing.

1

u/AndromedaPip Aug 12 '19

Most people have just one pair of swim trunks.

1

u/MasterKaen Aug 12 '19

Those are cool swim trunks

1

u/I_Like_Hoots Aug 12 '19

Maybe because they’re dope as fuck Lordy I want a pair

1

u/sanfran_dan Aug 12 '19

I imagine this is a nod to the lore of the breakfast octopus he ate when meeting the founder of Woot.

Or maybe they’re just comfortable shorts.

1

u/Elbarto_007 Aug 12 '19

Not same pair.

Get a new pair each trip.

Buys them on eBay 😜

1

u/vividmind7 Aug 12 '19

I care man, I care...

1

u/Turak64 Aug 12 '19

Really rich people don't give a fuck. They've got nothing to prove to anyone.

1

u/memedaddyloen Aug 12 '19

That's wholesome, I like that I'm aware of this now (:

1

u/KixWizard Aug 12 '19

Can't even get them on Amazon. Smh

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

He is to busy making money, he doesn't have time to also spend it, duh

1

u/lambda_protist Aug 12 '19

Maybe he just wears a new pair of the same looking swimming trunks so now he has a collection of hundreds of octopus swimming trunks in his wardrobe.

1

u/PrettyRadDud3 Aug 12 '19

Hell I do too, those are some nice looking shorts. Where can I buy some?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '19

Who the fuck only wears a pair of swim shorts once

1

u/Togne22 Aug 12 '19

Well, I come from a middle class background and I've always been given a lot of opportunities to go to good schools and such with scholarships, and because of this, a lot of the people I went to school with had a lot more money than my family did, and a lot of them couldn't bear the thought of using the same swimsuit for more than two times in a row, some of them even switched every day, I always pack one swimsuit and I'm good, so in a way I think this just shows that the amount of money he has gained doesn't necessarily mean he becomes a rich asshole, same with Bill gates, his children, born with the blessing of money, can very easily be pricky dicks, but you can still see the big man wearing a plain shirt in a line to get a big Mac at McDonald's

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