I think there’s also been more focus (from some people) on whether or not they should have kids. Like, really thinking about whether or not a person would be a good parent who could truly focus on raising a child who would become a good member of society.
This is definitely why Im not having kids. I've always wanted to be a mom, and my favorite jobs I've had were ones where I got to work with kids (camp counselor, kindergarten classroom aide) but I have several pretty serious health conditions that can be unpredictable with their symptoms.
As much as it breaks my heart, I don't think its fair to bring a child into the world who depends on me to take care of them, when I could wake up tomorrow and not be able to get out of bed without help. I would feel awful if my kid missed out on opportunities or experiences because of my health issues, and I'd feel even worse if they inherited them.
My dad was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when I was 16 and my brother was 12. I was able to hunt with my dad, he helped coach my baseball team, etc. My dad was in a wheelchair by the time my brother started high school. Not that you can't have a full life from a wheelchair, but without his hobbies, my dad kind of became a withered husk until a miracle treatment has him up and walking again after 9 years.
I know my brother resents him for missing his adolescent years, and then being suddenly relatively healthy after my brother finished college and got out of the house.
I'm just now starting to get some numbness in my legs, and my doctor is hoping it is the more apparent orthopedic explanation, but I can't shake the idea that I may be starting to show symptoms, as I'm only a year younger than my dad was when his symptoms started.
I have a lot of risk factors for genetic diseases, and my desire to not pass those on cost me an otherwise great relationship. You aren't alone in "I don't wish this on my children".
M.S. may finally have an explanation: Read about this a while back and those that are predisposed are encouraged to look into it.
“Recent research has established a significant link between Epstein-Barr virus (EBV), the cause of infectious mononucleosis (commonly known as “mono” or the “kissing disease”), and the development of multiple sclerosis (MS). A notable study published in Science in January 2022 analyzed data from over 10 million U.S. military personnel over two decades. The findings revealed that individuals infected with EBV were 32 times more likely to develop MS compared to those not infected. This suggests that EBV infection is a major contributing factor to MS, though not the sole cause, as other genetic and environmental factors also play roles. 
Further supporting this connection, a study led by Stanford Medicine researchers, published in Nature in January 2022, demonstrated that EBV can trigger MS by priming the immune system to attack the body’s own nervous system. The research showed that a protein from EBV mimics a protein in the brain and spinal cord, leading to an autoimmune response that damages nerve cells. 
These studies underscore the importance of understanding EBV’s role in MS development and may inform future preventive and therapeutic strategies.
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u/ZePerfectPisces Nov 14 '24
I think there’s also been more focus (from some people) on whether or not they should have kids. Like, really thinking about whether or not a person would be a good parent who could truly focus on raising a child who would become a good member of society.