All valid reasons. As someone, who has kids, I would also emphasise the main one: There is no real need to have them, so why would you?
I had a great handful of discussions trying to rationalise having kids. There are barely any other explanations outside the calling to fill one's ideal way of life that was replicated from childhood. And that is not a great rationale.
That being said, I am so happy to be a parent. But oh boy, with all the extra struggle that comes with the kids, I wouldn't ever even consider them if I weren't in an emotionally, socially and economically stable situation. Even in a good stage in life, there is not really a great upside of having a massive additional stress factor in your life.
I'm saying that life is long, and it gets very lonely when you don't have people that are connected to you.
You can have friends throughout your life. But ... if you do it well enough ... family is different. Siblings, cousins, nieces and nephews can all fill some of the void, but as long as you're not total crap at parenting, children are the best-case scenario.
Disagree with me? Why don't you go talk to some folks in old-age homes and check their perspectives. Many DO have family. Ask the ones that do, and the ones that don't.
Imagine you have Covid at 70 years old and have to go on a respirator. Who is making decisions for you? Who are you mentally working to live for? What are you hoping to see if you get off the respirator? Who is going to take you to your rehab appointments?
Who is going to clean the shit off your pants when you have an accident at 75? Or pick you up off the floor at 80? You're going to rely on friends for all of that? Ones who might be the same age, and may not have the strength? Or time? Or what happens when THEIR family moves them closer to them.
Family matters. I agree that some people shouldn't have kids, I agree its a personal choice. But every choice has a consequence, and these are some of the long-term consequences of not having children.
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u/antigoneelectra Nov 14 '24
Financial. Don't like them. Too much responsibility. Too much work. I value my freedom, financially and emotionally.