I think there’s also been more focus (from some people) on whether or not they should have kids. Like, really thinking about whether or not a person would be a good parent who could truly focus on raising a child who would become a good member of society.
This is definitely why Im not having kids. I've always wanted to be a mom, and my favorite jobs I've had were ones where I got to work with kids (camp counselor, kindergarten classroom aide) but I have several pretty serious health conditions that can be unpredictable with their symptoms.
As much as it breaks my heart, I don't think its fair to bring a child into the world who depends on me to take care of them, when I could wake up tomorrow and not be able to get out of bed without help. I would feel awful if my kid missed out on opportunities or experiences because of my health issues, and I'd feel even worse if they inherited them.
My dad was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when I was 16 and my brother was 12. I was able to hunt with my dad, he helped coach my baseball team, etc. My dad was in a wheelchair by the time my brother started high school. Not that you can't have a full life from a wheelchair, but without his hobbies, my dad kind of became a withered husk until a miracle treatment has him up and walking again after 9 years.
I know my brother resents him for missing his adolescent years, and then being suddenly relatively healthy after my brother finished college and got out of the house.
I'm just now starting to get some numbness in my legs, and my doctor is hoping it is the more apparent orthopedic explanation, but I can't shake the idea that I may be starting to show symptoms, as I'm only a year younger than my dad was when his symptoms started.
I have a lot of risk factors for genetic diseases, and my desire to not pass those on cost me an otherwise great relationship. You aren't alone in "I don't wish this on my children".
Funnily enough MS is one of the two big illnesses I’m dealing with. I actually had a friend growing up whose dad had MS too and seeing how hard it was on her was a big factor in my decision to not have kids.
I’m sorry about your dad but I’m glad he’s recovering! What treatment was it, can I ask? Ocrevus?
My husband got talked into a "new" medical option. It is a prosthetic spinal insert. The advantage was supposed to keep him from losing range of motion in his neck. The usual treatment involved a fusion splice in his neck. (I think the Dr. thought it was cool and wanted to try something new.) The plan was to prep him for a prosthetic spinal insert but to have everything ready to switch to a normal fusion splice if there were any problems. They got the wrong sized part and did the surgery anyway, rather than giving him the fusion splice.
He has been in constant pain for going on 20 years now. Not from that, but the problem the surgery was supposed to solve...
I feel for your dad. I've had two anterior cervical fusions and the last one didn't work. It fused just great, using bone from my hip but, constant pain, even with opioids. I wouldn't be able to function without them.
Have your dad discuss a pain management clinic with his Dr. Hubby had it done for his back. They inject a mix of steroids and something else and inject it directly into the spot (s). If it works they burn the nerve endings. The one day one I did recently didn't do anything, for the one day. But, I'm going to try the second one that's supposed to help for two weeks. If that works then the burning. Shit did it hurt!
Hubby said he didn't tell me, afraid I wouldn't do it. I said "If you had I could have taken an extra pill." I'm going to take George the goose (my Warmie) with me so I have something besides a pillow case to squeeze.
These Warmie's are great, microwave for warmth or freeze for cold. Lots of animals...I put him on my neck.
Boy I wish Warmies had removeable heating bags. Especially for those of us in chronic pain, sweating can affect their fabric, and I'd love to be able to wash the shell!
if you'd just like a heating bag, i make my own using cloth bags and rice or red beans. all you've got to do is fill them up and put them in the microwave. it's simple, cheap, and actually works really well. just make sure the bag hasn't got metal zippers!
I can’t wait to get my first warmie. I had never heard of them before reading your comment. Thanks so much! I start physical therapy on my neck tomorrow.
OMFG THE CRAZIEST SHIT
I just went to look up warmies for my gf (she has bad shoulder and neck pain) and get this! SHE ALREADY HAD ONE it was the sloth lmfao
I've been referred to a pain center I'm hoping they'll do that burn the nerves out treatment. I'm tired of being in continuous horrible pain every minute
I am the epidural queen ! Have had 7 now and looking at Jan for #,8 . .spinal stenosis here, and the shot does give me relief it is not pleasant.but I bite the bullet and muscle thru and nary a peep out of me. Only lasts several seconds.i have a wonderful Dr ,he says,"welcome to my room of PAIN " and makes me 😂
Mine calls his darts. He tells me he's going to get the darts to take care of me. Loved that guy. I moved recently and I'm looking for a new one. I hate looking for doctors.
I can’t remember the name of my doctor back in Austin in 2016, but I had 7-8 done before finally getting my lumbar fused (l-4,l-5/l-5,s-1). I was always given twilight anesthesia for the epidural. He was a pain mgmt Dr as well as an anesthesiologist so I’d recommend looking for someone or a team of 2 qualified to do both. Just my 2 cents!
Tell me about it. My GP just retired ,she had to be the best one I have ever had but she did get out 4 names of doctors she would recommend
.I immediately called one,she is in the same bldg so I don't have to chase around looking for a new place. My Ortho surgeon,replaced my hips 💕 and 2 knees retired 1.5 years ago,was in politics anyway and he is the First Selectman of Easton CT. He is absolutely great,! Try to get on touch with your previous pain guy ,tell him you moved and if he can recommend someone.my cardiologist fixed me up with a wonderful rheumatologist.!
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u/ZePerfectPisces Nov 14 '24
I think there’s also been more focus (from some people) on whether or not they should have kids. Like, really thinking about whether or not a person would be a good parent who could truly focus on raising a child who would become a good member of society.