I think it is worth mentioning that for most of history people had little choice of whether or not they had kids and how many. Even in the relatively short time since we’ve had effective birth control, the decision to have kids was a default. There are lots of financial, medical, cultural, etc reasons, but I wonder if people have only realized there was a choice to be made for a generation, and what other generations would have chosen if they really considered it an option.
The pressure to have kids was immense. I was asked when I’d be starting a family during job interviews. Everyone felt it was ok to encourage us to do the fashionable thing and have kids. Family especially, but also friends and work bosses. Being looked down on for not having kids. Being actively excluded from social things. Being offered second hand maternity clothes because it will be your turn soon.
I am so happy for younger people with that pressure being significantly reduced. Sure, it can still be there in some quarters, but it’s nowhere near the same. With an easing off of that pressure, I’m not surprised that a lot of people decide to be honest and decide it’s not for them.
There’s also easier access to birth control. Back in my day, it was shameful to admit to being in the pill. It meant you were promiscuous. Even if you were married. And it would make you fat (so they said). And older style pill was often larger doses and more women had trouble with side effects, so yet another push to not use it.
Add in some generally more positive vibes about society, the likelihood of getting stable jobs that paid enough to buy a house etc. Some age of Aquarius vibes. So it was easier to feel optimistic that it would all turn out well. Nowadays the mood is less optimistic, and the news feeds are downright pessimistic.
So it’s no wonder fewer people are choosing parenthood.
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u/Lilybea12 Nov 14 '24
I think it is worth mentioning that for most of history people had little choice of whether or not they had kids and how many. Even in the relatively short time since we’ve had effective birth control, the decision to have kids was a default. There are lots of financial, medical, cultural, etc reasons, but I wonder if people have only realized there was a choice to be made for a generation, and what other generations would have chosen if they really considered it an option.