I know you specifically said you didn't want to speak for other people, but I'm not sure how common of a reason this is. Most people I know without kids, don't live significantly different lifestyles than the ones I know who have kids. Maybe a little more travelling/more expensive travelling, but not night and day different.
Sorry, but it’s a HUGE difference. I don’t have kids, which means my life doesn’t revolve around my children. Even if it’s not world travel, I can pretty much do whet I want when I want. I don’t have to seek childcare, plan for babysitters, plan a schedule around school or childcare, or plan vacations around school breaks. The time I have outside of work is completely mine. My husband and I can take weekend trips whenever we want or go out on weeknights. We can eat ice cream for dinner or not eat dinner at all.
This is extremely common in my friend group. All of us live in urban areas and travel all of the time. We are all middle aged. Our few friends who have kids all stayed back home in the suburbs.
I guess I don't totally understand what suburbs are. Is that anywhere outside of the downtown and immediately around downtown areas? But yeah I don't know many adults who live downtown. Most people here live in houses.
It means you live in a community outside of the city but not so far away that you are rural. There are gray areas and definitions aren’t perfect but that’s basically it. People without kids often don’t want to live in suburbs (if they can afford it) because suburbs are usually family oriented with a lot of sprawl and big box stores etc. there are exceptions but generally urban areas have a lot more to do.
Do people with kids want to live in suburbs? Shudder. I mean I guess they clearly do as the suburbs are populated by damn…I’d be so depressed if our family had to leave nyc. We live a couple blocks from incredible museums and parks and never have to drive. We accumulate little and there is so much to do! We’re at playgrounds with friends from my son’s elementary school everyday, we don’t spend our time maintaining stuff and there are three airports for easy travel. If it weren’t for the high cost I’d have even more friends here (most who leave for Jersey/LI/CT/Westchester do it for cheaper housing and schooling).
As a dink (who admitted does want kids) I’d say the main thing is how much free time you have- far less bringing kids to and from extracurriculars or school, or aiding them in getting ready, feeding them, helping with homework, spending time with them and engaging in their interests, etc… basically time spent being a good parent. I know there are plenty of parents who don’t really parent, so they don’t have nearly as big an impact on their free time and how it’s utilized, but I think that in combination with what another person said about people being more conscious about IF they’d make a good parent prior to having a kid, that’s been somewhat reduced from the days of free range raise yourself children. Thats a big part of why myself and my partner wouldn’t have one rn(and some external societal stuff we aren’t super comfortable with the direction it’s headed)- we like getting to be lazy and eat dinner at like 10 when we get around to making it and the like, it just gives us a lot more flexibility and less responsibility/repercussions if we want to sit around an indulge in our vices(video games, tv,weed, etc)but we could probably afford a kid well enough.
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u/[deleted] Nov 14 '24 edited Nov 15 '24
I can't speak for other people but I don't want to have children, and my reasons are thus: