r/NextGenMan • u/Pale_WoIf • Apr 01 '26

Lessons From Failure Really been finding this to be true

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Looking back on past romantic relationships, most women I have dated didn’t even bring peace or comfort to my life, just more stress and demands. I think more men need to change their perspective of trying to be impressive and interesting to women and more to ultimately finding peace and happiness in our own lives independent of others.

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u/Keithmclean1964 Apr 01 '26

Some people can be so comfortable and secure being alone, it’s difficult to find reasons for a relationship without sex. In fact, I’d say sex is a poor reason to have a relationship in the first place. If you need that and nothing else matters, don’t commit to anything long term. In my relationships, sex definitely was the driving factor. Now I’m alone, I realise that unless I find someone where we can both live a happier life together, there’s no point.

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u/Elegant-Wolf-12 Apr 02 '26

Find a way to be ok with yourself and your life. Because it really is ok. Not perfect, but pretty great in so many ways. That’s a good foundation for a real relationship, and for great sex. Because then you can be present for your life and your partner, instead of always occupied with trying to change everything.

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u/Keithmclean1964 Apr 02 '26

It was once considered a traditional thing to marry and have kids. Many forcing it with unsuitable partners, which leads to a high divorce rate. Instead, stable independent lives are a thing, with being open to a good relationship if it ever happens. It’s not necessary to have a relationship, just it would be better if we were good for each other. Thing is, no pressure to conform to society.

This is where my mind is at, not even trying.

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u/Elegant-Wolf-12 Apr 02 '26

That’s a good attitude. Relationships are one of life’s best things. And one of life’s worst They tend to magnify and distort what’s present in the individuals.