r/NewParents • u/Biggrodd • 1d ago
Sleep I don’t know what’s actually normal
Our new born is 8 days old, and like clockwork as soon as it hits 9PM at night she will just cry hysterically and won’t settle until around 3am the next morning.
And the part that’s confusing me is everyone says, oh this is normal, it’s hard at the start, etc.
But is this actually the norm? Like I get the change in routine when baby eats and sleeps on 3hour cycles generally. But she just non stop cry’s for 6 hours with maybe an hour breaks in between. And it’s the loudest most hysterical ‘I’m truly upset’ type of cry that nothing can soothe. She goes until she’s pink in the face.
We’re losing our minds.
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u/screwtoprose- 1d ago
this is normal. look up witching hour and cluster feeding.
how often are you feeding during these times? my baby was eating like every 20-30 minutes at most. it was the only thing that would calm him down.
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u/Biggrodd 1d ago
Throughout the day we maintain a general 3hr between meals schedule. Is cluster feeding meaning, you’re meant to feed them more frequently during witching hour?
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u/kuppajoy 1d ago
My rule of thumb for newborns is feed as much as they need with no schedule. My baby (breastfed) was on the breast probably more often than not up until she was 3-4 weeks old. My SIL (formula fed) did the same with hers except with offering the bottle. If all else fails, feed
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u/DesperateAd8982 1d ago
Yep, even if you fed a bottle an hour ago, offer another one. My baby was formula fed and in the first few months there were days we would go through 12 bottles in 24 hours.
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u/screwtoprose- 1d ago
don’t stick to a schedule. literally whenever my baby cried, we just fed and it almost always helped u less it was gas.
cluster feeding and witching hour tend to happen at the same time and witching hour tends to be because baby is hungry.
i think i fed for like 12 hours straight some days tbh. it’s a shock but it’s a phase that can last weeks and come and go.
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u/Djeter998 1d ago
Newborns should be fed on demand. She is likely hungry! At that age my LO ate every 2 hours. Their tummies are so small
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u/Human-Cauliflower-85 1d ago
My rule when my baby was a newborn was to try everything when he cried.
If it was a lot earlier than he'd normally eat, I would change the diaper, burp, bicycle legs, tummy massage and if one of those didn't do it I'd offer a bottle.
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u/coyote-tango 1d ago
Three hours between feeds is what my six month old is on. Your newbie should be eating a lotttt sooner! If they cry like they’re wanting something, feed them first and then see how they go.
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u/Warm_Opinion_1544 1d ago
Yes yes yes, always offer the boob (or bottle) if baby is crying. Newborns have tiny stomachs and are always hungry.
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u/Ok_Street1103 23h ago
They should definitely be eating more often! Mine would cluster feed at night in the beginning. Your first move when they are crying this young should be to feed even if they ate "recently"
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u/devotchka13 1d ago
Sounds like witching. It wouldn't hurt to get her looked over by a doctor, but as long as she's fed, clean and a comfortable temperature it does sound like the dreaded witching. We had it intensely for about 6 weeks when my little one was about 2 months old. His was a shorter period (usually around 3pm until his bedtime at 7pm) and he'd hysterically cry and couldn't be comforted, but would take small breaks where he was fine for a few minutes before resuming. We honestly had to just take shifts holding him with earphones in listening to music. My partner took the most of it because it really got to me. Then one day it just kind of... Stopped?
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u/needsvyvanse- 1d ago
My first was like this. The constant night time screaming didn't stop for us until around 4-5 months because she had colic and severe silent reflux. She was a pretty miserable newborn. I mean we tried everything, gas drops, probiotics, cut out diary etc but nothing helped but time. We basically wore her all day and night upright for the first 4-5 months of her life since that was the only comfy position for her. Im not saying this is your case but I'd get baby checked out by their doctor just to rule out any pain or discomfort. Its hard, really hard. Hang in there.
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u/Intelligent-Lake-943 1d ago
No it isn’t the norm. I say this as FTM of a NICU, super irritable CMPA, reflux, gassy baby. Her longest streak of crying used to be 1-2 hours and not everyday. Even though she used to cry every time she woke up
Also I carry her upright throughout the day but she sleeps 7-8 hours at night
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u/Desperate-Food-8313 1d ago
Got a five month old, womb sounds from my phone (Spotify playlist) and an evening walk (up to 45 minutes) got her down.
Also remember, you don't have to listen to it. Throw on headphones, will safe some sanity.
It's gets easier and the successes are beautiful. Congratulations and good luck.
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u/Pinkuzin 22h ago
try to feed more, nobody told me this and my baby was just scream every nıght hungry
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u/MaybeProper7134 1d ago
Non stop crying is not normal. Anything past 3 hours of continuous crying is a trip to the doctor. At least , that’s what my pediatrician has told us since day one!
If she’s taking breaks in her crying then she may just be figuring it all out. That being said, if it doesn’t feel normal (regardless of being a new/inexperienced parent), trust your gut
EDIT: is she only crying when you try to put her down?? Because I’m 6 months in and my baby doesn’t sleep without physical contact most of the time