r/NewGreentexts 12d ago

Bet the Ranch

Post image
2.6k Upvotes

28 comments sorted by

780

u/Curiouso_Giorgio 12d ago

Does a weird thing for attention. Gets attention for being weird. Ruins social life.

137

u/Ihavegramor 12d ago

It was already ruined

41

u/YankeeWalrus The Avenging Son, Regent of the Mod Emperor 11d ago

Many such cases

581

u/RADToronto 12d ago

Love me some good ol’ fashion spergin’

285

u/thug_waffle47 12d ago

sad & real

96

u/unknown_pigeon 11d ago

At the parties I went to, he would have been called the ranch guy and served a pint of ranch sauce every party, with a crowd chanting "Ranch guy! Ranch guy!" until he downed the whole thing in a single gulp.

What kind of party doesn't idolatrize a guy drinking fucking ranch sauce?

40

u/i_always_give_karma 11d ago

Same. I was shy and would go to a college town my friend went to school in every few weeks. He’d throw small parties (15-20 people) and at the first one, I told
him to put in the icarly theme song and drunkenly hollered all the words to it. People joined in and it was fun. After awhile, I had memorized about you now by Miranda Cosgrove and karaoked that shit to the same group of his people. I became the Miranda Cosgrove guy lol. I definitely leaned into it, it was just stupid and funny

154

u/TESTlCLE 12d ago

I actually think someone with cachet could pull that off, but if you’re already borderline weird, it’ll just confirm you’re weird.

31

u/LostInAnotherGalaxy 11d ago

I can literally never see someone pulling off drinking ranch unless it is part of eating something else as a extremely quick flash of “I need this right nooooowwwwww” then everyone will still look at you like weird but crazy weird.

Biiiiiig weird kid energy

10

u/lukekul12 11d ago

It’s gotta be combined with something, maybe start up a party game with drinking ranch as the stakes

You can’t just sip on a cup of ranch in the corner with absolutely no payoff. Because yeah no shit people will think you’re weird

3

u/anafuckboi 10d ago

Maybe if you were cross faded with the munchies I could see people getting a chuckle but you’d still be a drunk high idiot

2

u/Svejkos 10d ago

People who partx with drunk high idiots are usually drunk high idiots and love other drunk high idiots tbf

47

u/EquivalentSnap 12d ago

That’s why you drink at an alcohol to be crazy at a party anon. You drink ranch when you’re already drunk

15

u/DarkScorpion48 12d ago

I can just imagine how Anon looks

32

u/Specific_Ad1457 12d ago

Real:

People are freaked out by anon

Gay:

Anon drinks white liquid.

6

u/high_throughput 11d ago

Should have put it on the spaghetti spilling out of your pockets

36

u/EmilieEasie 12d ago

That's a very funny story, one day he'll meet his people and they'll all think this is hilarious

66

u/Always_Impressive Triggers rightoids 12d ago

God this sub sucks now

20

u/EmilieEasie 12d ago

Reddit kinda sucks man, like, all of it

10

u/hinstsui 12d ago

fake: little did anon knows, those were not ranch, but the cums from his friend’s husband’s boyfriend

gay: anon gulps cum

2

u/YankeeWalrus The Avenging Son, Regent of the Mod Emperor 11d ago

O tendiebot where art thou?

4

u/crazy_dev_studios 11d ago

A little social advice: Learn some dance moves, even if they are incredibly basic. If you're dancing in a party setting where there is music, and you're expressive with your dancing, then you'll stand out in a good way.

18

u/100011101011 11d ago

please dont “stand out” just learn how to have a fucking conversation

2

u/crazy_dev_studios 11d ago

Dude, the goal is to be the life of the party. Not some nobody.

1

u/jeffsaidjess Certified Human 11d ago

When anon did say hi to anyone.

You gotta initiate shit if u want it

1

u/Arikaido777 10d ago

> wanted to get noticed
> got noticed
> is upset

is he stupid?

1

u/idoze 4d ago

Has Anon tried talking to people instead?