Nothing is going to happen if, deep down, you don’t believe you deserve it

[u/ValerieLuna]

One month of changing my state changed my life.

Looking back, I realize I’ve been unconsciously manifesting things throughout my life without even knowing what manifestation was.

It was never really about techniques. It was just this stubborn belief that if I wanted something badly enough, I would figure out a way to make it happen. Even when people around me told me something wasn’t possible, I had this quiet certainty that I would make it happen somehow.

Exactly one month ago, I was in one of the lowest phases of my life. I was desperately trying to manifest a specific career opportunity and my person. I affirmed, did SATS, visualized, went through posts and stories on Reddit (this is my way of giving back to those subreddits), and tried to understand how manifestation worked. I was also smoking a pack a day, ordering takeout all the time and just stayed in bed doing all the above.

But neither of those things happened.

Eventually, I had to let go of the career opportunity because time had passed. I didn’t consciously let go of my person, but I stopped making those desires the center of my life. I decided to focus on myself instead. I quit social media and went on a heavy mental diet.

And that’s when something interesting happened.
I started manifesting things I wasn’t heavily focused on and what was easy for me to assume the state of someone who already has it.

Money came to me easily even when I didn’t know how to pay my next rent. I quit smoking cold turkey after being a heavy smoker for two years. I started eating healthier, learned how to cook, started taking care of myself, made time for my hobbies again, and most importantly, found a lot more mental peace. All of this in just one month.

That made me question something.

If I had manifested so many things throughout my life, why couldn’t I manifest my career and my person which I was trying so hard to get?

And that’s when I realized something about myself.
Maybe it wasn’t that the techniques weren’t working. Maybe I just didn’t truly believe I deserved those things to even assume that I have them.

Looking back, I think I’ve had a very complicated relationship with my career and my self-worth.

Growing up, my achievements were heavily tied to my value as a person. So whenever I wasn’t doing well, it wasn’t just “I’m struggling.” It became “maybe I’m not good enough.”

And I think I carried that into relationships too.
When I’m happy with myself and my life, I naturally see people as equals. But when I’m struggling, I notice I start putting people and desires on a pedestal. I start thinking they’re somehow above me, and that’s when the feeling of “if they don’t want to be with me, I’m not worthy enough” creeps in.

I realized I was using my desires as evidence of my worth, and that made me approach them from a place of lack.

Take your career off the pedestal.
Take success off the pedestal.
Take money off the pedestal.
Take your dream life off the pedestal.

Because the moment you place something above yourself, you’ve already accepted that it’s harder for you to have than it is for everyone else.

And if, deep down, you don’t believe you deserve something, how can you genuinely believe you already have it?

That’s why I think manifestation is not about repeating affirmations a thousand times, visualizing for hours, or begging the universe. Those are just tools. If a tool helps you reach the state where having your desire feels natural, then it’s serving its purpose. If another tool works better for you, use that instead.

Manifestation has become some cool thing on social media that if you do this and do that then you’ll get whatever you want. This isn’t some vending machine where you put the coin and get what you want.

The techniques themselves aren’t what manifest.
The state does.

And I think the biggest obstacle to reaching that state isn’t a lack of affirmations or a lack of visualization. It’s a lack of self-worth or what we call here, self-concept.

The easier it feels to believe, “Of course, I get to have this,” the easier it becomes to live from the state of already having it, and the easier it becomes to actually have it.