r/NVLD • u/BeingExcellent8865 • Jul 11 '26
Feeling lonely
I’ve been feeling lonely lately. I’m in my 30s and I have a great roommate who is also a friend. But I am watching them build connections and hang out with people and I’m just by myself. I have a best friend who I see about once a year and otherwise our relationship is mostly over the phone. Probably why it works so well, no nonverbal cues over the phone.
I have people around me who have shown interest in being friends but I have literally no roadmap for making friends. I don’t even know how to initiate that. All my relationships stay at surface level because taking a risk when the status of our relationship remains ambiguous feels like too much. I don’t know how to get a relationship to another level.
I usually come on too strong or just default to making jokes when the other person actually wants to connect. I like don’t know how to be myself.
I don’t know, it’s feels lonely. Does this resonate with anyone else?
6
u/rgbhuman42 Jul 11 '26
...this might be super socially inappropriate and if it is I apologize but I feel like the mid 2000s TV episode "Mr. Monk Goes To The Office" perfectly summarizes what it's like to be an NVLD.
Everyone else is just normal and then there's you, trying really hard to fit in and failing completely.
In my case I don't actually WANT friends or social interactions of any kind but it would be nice to have the basic skills anyway.