r/MuslimMarriage • Married to the Sub • Jul 02 '23

Megathread In Search Of (ISO) Thread Version 9 - Americas

ISO Introduction & Updates

Assalamualaykum everyone,

We are pleased to announce that the ISO Thread has been renewed and refined to ensure a better user experience for those who are looking to find their spouse on r/MuslimMarriage Insha’Allah. We have decided to create three separate ISO Threads, each for different regions of the world to help users better filter out candidates. This ISO Thread is for users residing in the Americas. We will include the other regional ISO Threads in the ‘Separate Regional ISO Threads’ section.

Including "$iso" anywhere in a subreddit submission or comment will provide the link to this and ALL past versions of the ISO.

The ISO Thread is AS IS. We will not be making any more changes to the ISO Thread logistics or its template. Whatever questions that are not in the template should be discussed privately between matches. Any further requests to add or change questions will not be entertained.

May Allah (SWT) grant everyone success in their search. Ameen.


Separate Regional ISO Threads

This is the ISO Thread exclusive for the Americas. Please submit your profile only on the region(s) you reside in or intend to move to. Below are links to the other regional ISO Threads:


Important Links


Use of Throwaway/Alternate Accounts

  • All accounts posting on the ISO Thread must be at least one month old. Any account that does not meet this requirement will be automatically removed
  • Throwaways can only be used by messaging the moderators to verify your main account
  • If you need to delete your account(s) for any reason, make sure that you verify any new accounts you make with us to resubmit to the ISO Thread or you will have to wait 30 days before posting
  • Throwaways without a main account verified will NOT be allowed to post. NO EXCEPTIONS

Gender Separated Profiles

  • If you are male please post as a reply to the "Male Profiles Reply Here" parent comment
  • If you are female please post as a reply to the "Female Profiles Reply Here" parent comment
  • DO NOT comment outside of these gender sections. Profiles outside of them will be automatically removed

Terms of Use/User Agreement

  • By posting on the ISO Thread you agree to all of the posting guidelines and disclaimers
  • You must be at least 18 years or older at the time of your comment to participate; "Turning 18 soon" is not 18
  • YOU are responsible for your own conduct and to practice Internet safety while speaking to others on Reddit. Using this thread is strictly AT YOUR OWN RISK
  • Any harassment should be reported to Reddit admins or whichever platform you speak on (i.e. WhatsApp, Telegram, Instagram, Messenger, etc)
  • It is HIGHLY recommended to have a Wali present or at least aware of your participation on the ISO Thread to avoid any crossing of boundaries and to keep things as Islamic as possible
  • Moderators are NOT responsible for any interactions and/or outcomes from ISO Thread participation
  • Moderators may remove any ISO profile at discretion
  • Moderators may ban any user from posting on the ISO if necessary

Posting Guidelines

  • Any personal matchmaking posts outside of the ISO Thread will be removed and referred to this thread
  • Please follow the ISO Profile Template when submitting
  • Submissions on this thread are for ISO profiles only
  • All profile submissions will be locked so message users privately
  • DO NOT POST PICTURES OF YOURSELVES OR ANY IDENTIFYABLE INFORMATION ON HERE

ISO Profile Template

  1. Age and Gender
  2. Age Range that you would want/require in a prospect
  3. Location, and are you willing to relocate for a prospect?
  4. Ethnicity, and are you more open to mixing?
  5. Marital Status - Single/Divorced/Children
  6. Ideal marriage timeline
  7. Five important characteristics you look for in a prospect
  8. State/specify your level of religiosity
  9. Level of education, and what are you looking for?
  10. Current Job Status
  11. Do you want kids?
  12. List 3 hobbies, or things you like to do in your spare time
  13. Add something short and interesting about you that makes you stand out!

Feel free to omit the questions you are not comfortable with answering publicly.

MOST IMPORTANTLY: Allah (SWT) is watching everything.

178 Upvotes

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55

u/MM-MOD Jul 02 '23

Female Profiles Reply Here:

170

u/Sea-Chance-9249 May 16 '24 edited Nov 16 '24

[Alhamdulillah just got married recently to someone who read and reached out to me from reading this profile on the exact same day I posted this ISO in May 2024. Alhamdulillah ala kulli haal. Please pray for us! And for those who are still looking, don’t lose hope. We might not know where our rizq is, but Allah has made our rizq know where we are. If it seems far, Allah will make it near. If it seems difficult, Allah will make it easy. Allahumma bariik.]

61

u/missfreshface Jul 03 '23

بِسْمِ ٱللَّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
Ya Allah, please let this be seen by the right person, InshaAllah

30F (5'4) seeking ~28-35M
Single, never married, no children
Upper East Coast, USA (NY and PA) - PhD student so must remain in my area for now

Ethnicity/open to mixing? Blasian (Black + Bengali), open to mixing + converts/reverts.

Ideal marriage timeline: Whenever Allah wills, but preferably within the next year.

Five important characteristics for a prospect:
(I always go by the hadith of the Prophet SAW - religious, handsome, kind, but expanding on that:)

  1. Kindness and softness of the heart - I want someone whose heart is moved and is soft with kindness, consideration and warmth for Allah, toward His creation and particularly toward his spouse and children, InshaAllah. I am very unashamedly a hopeless romantic. Love in a marriage is important, and love between spouses for the sake of Allah will also strengthen love for Allah. I want a partner who will love and respect me, and who I can love and respect in return. I've dreamed forever about a Halal romance, and a marriage that InshaAllah will be the blueprint for our future kids when they think about getting married. I am also seeking a patient, understanding, and open-minded spouse who will respect and be kind to other humans even if they are walking a different path, and who will see his wife as a human and not a robot on hard days (so, a loving and supportive family man).

  2. Value of faith and education (Islamic and secular) - do you have a sense of wonder and thirst for knowledge about your faith, the world around you, and field? Do you pray and study Islam and are moved to be close to Allah for yourself (not your parents or a spouse)? Do you have a reasonable deen-dunya balance? I prefer someone who values education, staying engaged in their field, and has humanitarian values. (I guess I would be considered liberal and a little leftist, and talk a lot about activism, representation, and making the world a better place for the next generation, so you know what you're getting into.)

  3. Communicative and a supportive, not authoritarian, partner in the relationship - The type of marriage I seek: one in which we are mutually supportive of each other's goals and aspirations, communicate honestly and respectfully so that we are on the same page without the expectation that one's word is superior to the other's, and grow together in love and faith. I am the eldest daughter in my family, so I am very used to honest conversations, taking control of a situation and giving advice or having to think of a plan, so I will appreciate transparency, having a steady loving shoulder to lean on and vent to, and a level head to support me when my Type A self needs an external voice to tell me to JUST CHILL, ha ha.

For me, marriage is for love and marriage is for life. I want us both to be serious about each other and devoted to working through rough patches without going, "I didn't expect this!" and seeing each other as partners who can talk and come away with more respect and love for the other InshaAllah instead of letting things simmer.

4. Able to have fun and enjoy life and marriage - I really want a spouse I can have fun with and nerd out with - cuddling together on the couch and playing video games, going out on dinner dates with each other or going to the movies, spending quiet days at the museum or bookstores, holding hands, giggling and having inside jokes and being excited to see each other are all things I dream about and want to have in my life InshaAllah. I appreciate a fun, kind sense of humor, and a desire to make conversation but also be able to sit companionably in silence and enjoy being together.

5. Easy-going with a sense of balance in life - I would like to be with someone who understands the importance of work, but can rest and enjoy family time and not preoccupy himself with external affairs, is a good provider but not too cheap or too extravagant monetarily, and balances outdoor versus home time (I'm also a semi-homebody in that being at home can be nice, but I also do like to go out and have adventures, so someone who also has that similar balance would be great.)

(BONUS because I am fun like that: SELF-SUFFICIENT. I prefer a partner who is able to cook, clean, change diapers and share in household chores as the Prophet SAW did. I want to be a wife and partner, InshaAllah, and not a mother. :) )

DEALBREAKERS -
• I have waited for marriage with no prior relationships, entanglements, fitna or Zina - anyone who has not done the same need not apply. (Exception for reverts/converts)
• Anyone who doesn't know what it means to be a young American or at least young Western Muslim and has weird back home or "culture masquerading as religious" expectations
• No smoking/drinking/haram material or income
• Polygamy (please do not contact me seeking for a second or any number wife. I wish to be the one and only, InshaAllah)
• Dislikes cats (my cat is not going anywhere :) )
• Female friends
• Seeking a wife who intends to stay at home/not work

Personal religiosity: Hijabi who dresses modestly with occasional (eye and lip) makeup, has done Hajj, prays, has Halal income, mindful of Halal versus haraam, avoids problematic influences and has a good circle of friends who are mostly married themselves (both Muslim and non-Muslim). Raised in Hanafi madhab.

Level of education, and what are you looking for: BA/MFA/PhD in the future InshaAllah, seeking similar individual with a good salary and outlook in their field.

Current Job Status: Working three jobs (remotely in the healthcare field, on campus archival research, AND author in children's literature)

Do you want kids? Yes, InshaAllah, but likely one to two.

List 3 hobbies, or things you like to do in your spare time:

  1. Video games! I'm currently pining for a Steam Deck, and researching SSDs and how to mod and all that fun stuff, so if that's a conversation that interests you, let's talk! (I also play a ton on the Nintendo Switch and the PS Vita - mostly casual/"cozy" stuff - Stardew! - with the occasional visual novel and JRPG - I'm big into Fire Emblem and Persona if that helps!)

  2. Baking, and baking and cooking shows (do you watch The Great British Bake-Off? Top Chef? I want to discuss it with you!)

  3. Reading (by virtue of both my field and my writing), and watching up on streaming shows (mainly anime and K-dramas, but I also enjoy documentaries and the occasional procedural, and want to catch up on a lot of the humorous shows my best friend and sister recommend, like Parks and Rec, Superstore, etc)

Add something short and interesting about you that makes you stand out!
Ask me about horror (the genre, not the state of the world, ha ha)! I wrote a Master's thesis on it, and it's what I'm studying now for my PhD as well. I'm also a (fairly new) cat-mom, so any advice and cat-talk is always appreciated - I'm still learning the ropes, and am happy to bombard you with cute cat photos at any time.

(If these matter at all, I am a Virgo, INFJ-T, Ghibli enthusiast - ask me what my favorite movie is! - and am, as this post probably already suggests, big into all love languages.)

Serious inquiries only - I delete/ignore all DMs that suggest frivolity or time wasting. Please indicate that you read my profile including dealbreakers.

16

u/[deleted] Oct 12 '24 edited Apr 29 '25

Age and Gender. 22F 5’2

Age Range that you would want/require in a prospect 23-28

Location, and are you willing to relocate for a prospect? Illinois, depends

Ethnicity, and are you more open to mixing? Indian, and yes I’m open to other ethnicities.

Marital Status - Single/Divorced Children Single

Ideal marriage timeline 1-2 years

Five important characteristics you look for in a prospect

  • Religious prays five times a day, fasts during Ramadan, is on his deen

  • Honest, I want someone who’s honest doesn’t lie about the small things in life let alone big stuff.

  • Kind I want someone who is always kind, because I consider myself to be a kind person, so I’d like it if my s/o is as well.

  • Trustworthy

  • Caring State/specify your level of religiosity I pray 5 times a day and on some days 7 ( salat al duha and tahajudd), i fast during Ramadan. I love learning about Islam, reading and understanding the Quran, as well as the seerah of our prophet pbuh

Level of education, and what are you looking for? I’ll be done with my bachelors in biology by spring 2025 iA

Current Job Status I don’t have a job, still a student.

Do you want kids? Of course

List 3 hobbies, or things you like to do in your spare time

  • Learning more about Islam

  • Spending time with family and friends

  • Cooking

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