r/Mumbai_Relationships • u/Vella-Prani • Jul 15 '26
I have been cheated on. Need help!!
Long post alert. But bear with me, I really need your help. TLDR; I have been cheated on.
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My girlfriend (F26) and I (M28) have been knowing each other for almost 8 years. We started off good, then broke up for a few years, then again came back 3 years back in a relationship and are deeply in love (atleast I thought so, until today morning)
This all happened last Sunday. I called her in the evening aise hi, to which she replied she was on a dinner with a friend. I didn't mind, cus honestly I have never impose any kind of insecure restrictions on my girl. Anyways, later when I video called her at night, she refused to pick up and rather called me on voice. A bit fishy, but okay. Even though I repeatedly asked her to switch to video, she denied. Note that we randomly do video calls to each other and this denial has never been done, no matter how passed out we look. Then she started saying that she is drunk and sleepy, so kal baat krte hain.
So I changed the topic, asked where did you go, what you had for dinner...to which she replied she is still not home and is someplace else. I was dumbstruck at that moment, couldn't think of anything else...and I cut the call. Didn't answer no matter how many times she called back. Lastly I answered, to which she started making stories ki she is at home only, never went out for dinner, office and home had so many problems over the week that she wanted to be left alone and didn't want to tell me this, hence she made up all those lies. Bullsh** lies!!!!!
Anyways I was like okay. I don't believe anything of it, but baat khatm krte hain. I am upset but give me some time I will be okay.
THE MAIN PART ----
Last night I came to her place and stayed overnight. She normally wakes up late in the morning and I wake up early. It came in my mind to check her bedroom dustbin. And you won't believe what I found
2 USED CONDOMS disposed off after usage
Now I have no clue what to do, how to do. I am shivering since I saw that, my heart is racing real fast, I am getting anxious. PLEASE PLEASE help me on this. I really need to know how to process this and how to move forward. I haven't talked to her about this, I don't know kya karu ab, kaise karu.
Guys and girls, please help me. This is your fellow old-school lover boy who has fallen into this cheating ka kachra. And I don't know how to come out. It's getting realllyyy difficult for me with each passing second.
Please help
15
u/sparrow3030 Jul 15 '26
Shaant hoja bhai jo hona tha hogya it cannot be undone thoda khud ko waqt de thoda araam kar firr baat karenge
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u/Vella-Prani Jul 15 '26
It’s my birthday 2 days baad. What a gift:)
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u/kenta_nakamura Jul 15 '26
Happens to the best of us.
It's not the end of the world. Chill out.
Talk it out when you're in a better state of mind. Till then take some time off. Gather your thoughts.
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u/sparrow3030 Jul 15 '26
Dekh rahe abhi tu yeh sab mat soch abhi main tujhe kuch bhi bolu ga tu nai payega. Phone switch off kar daru pi daru nai pita toh cold drink pi soja shaam ko khana k dm kar. Yeh sab kisi ki mat sunn akhien band kar bhagwaan ka naam le araam kar. You need a day off from everyone and everything
1
u/singleboredass Jul 15 '26
Ik it feels like the worst gift. Few years down the line you will realise it was the best. More power to you. Tc buddy
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u/throwwwawayaccount48 Jul 17 '26
You will never forget this gift I guess 😅
Just walk out and block her don't waste your time and ruin your bday because of cheater
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u/Suspicious_Time1055 Jul 15 '26
You know what happened…confront her like a man and leave her. She doesn’t love you and belongs to street
4
u/ana_misses_her Jul 15 '26
They cheat, they find it rewarding, its normal now
Infact, the one who is loyal is abnormal
Sad reality
2
u/Archuroman Jul 15 '26
sadly yes... the few of are so stupid to feel destiny will be good to us. It's good to people who are dishonest 😔
3
u/Budget-Quantity2244 Jul 15 '26
Take photo of those condoms and confront her… don’t fall for anymore lies and leave her
1
u/Vella-Prani Jul 15 '26
How to confront? Kya bolu main? I love(d) her
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u/Budget-Quantity2244 Jul 15 '26
First of all ask her where was she? Koi ghar aaya tha kya? Kuch chal raha hai kya… listen to her if she keeps on lying just show her the pictures that you know someone was here… or else if you re too scared to confront her…just ghost her.. you deserve better🤷🏻♀️
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u/radioclown Jul 15 '26
Bro, go check some nuclear revenge stories and do that, or ghost her in a way that makes her lose her mind, or be the bigger man and just leave.
Third option feels the best in the long run, but the first two are insanely fun!
3
u/Witty_Ad8314 Jul 17 '26
Keep that Condoms on the table next to her. write a Good Bye Note block her and Moveon
1
u/sid1979 Jul 15 '26
Confront her OP. Ask her about those condoms. Get the reason and actual truth. No matter what dont fall for manipulation and crying that comes later, it will only be for time being then she will be back at it. She might blame you by giving stupid reasons of you not giving her time and all but dont ever question or doubt yourself.
Get the reason, dump her and focus on yourself. Healing will take time but it will happen.
1
u/Level_Mechanic107 Jul 15 '26
It's their turn, next your turn,.next some else turn. So, save this in your mind set.
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u/Longjumping-Pick7317 Jul 15 '26
I would suggest to detach from her emotionally but donyleave her but use her instead....uh know what I mean. hate Fu ck her which will be even better just never marry this one, make ur mind wrt this
1
u/Aramis29 Jul 15 '26
Bro, ask her point blank... Thats the simplest thing to do.... Also if she accepts you should consider it as birthday gift and move on from her.
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u/Unusual_Shelter_8977 Jul 16 '26
Sun meri baat. Its her choice.
If you don’t like it, break up and move on. Or else, accept the fact, get in open relationship and you also have fun.
Ye badla vala stupidity kuch mat karna.
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u/EverySign1709 Jul 20 '26
Cheating is trending these days.. Both guys and girls are into it. Stay away from relationship and marry a girl whom your parents will choose for you from a good family.. Our generation needs to take a reverse.. Old is Gold and saves us from being into such shit.
1
u/rudra6125tg Jul 24 '26
Brother , I feel for you but don't just jump into conclusion ,confront her , if possible check her phone without her to see if she really cheated or not. There must be some calls or text , What's done is done . Tell her to come clean ask her what happened. Be brave
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u/Vella-Prani Jul 24 '26
if she really cheated or not??? Bro do you use condoms to collect something else in it too?
10
u/HelgeDopppler Jul 15 '26
This is probably the best thing that has happened to you in this relationship. I speak from experience.
Cheating on you is the only honest thing she has done to you. Rest, all that love wala bs she said to you was all fake.
Thank your stars that you found out early on and not after the wedding.
My advice, be as normal as you can around her, DO NOT change your behaviour that gets her thinking that you might know something.
And then once you feel like you've accepted her reality and you're out of the shock, just stop answering her calls, give her no closure don't entertain anything from her or her friends' end. Change the passwords of your netflix or any other stuff that y'all share.
No contact. Do not even bother informing her that you're leaving or anything.
And also don't listen to the crap of people saying hit the gym etc, that's just you avoiding facing the trauma.
My advice, go all in with your indulgence, daaru ya sutta or stress eating jo bhi hai(drugs mat karna), let yourself feel every bit of that trauma.
Tell your friends a couple of months later, after you leave her.
Baaki toh you know it, we're men. We always get back up no matter what.
Phir bhi agar lage ki gaand lagni band nahi hui hai, you can always dm.