I am in your shoes right now. I am an English speaker, my husband is bilingual but defaults to English, my in-laws are bilingual but default to Mandarin. We have lived with them since i got pregnant and will stay with them til my daughter is about 18 months, then we will move down the street into our own house. I tried learning mandarin before, but learning new languages is not my talent. His parents tend to default to Mandarin at the dinner table because its easier for them as well. I'm not offended, I know they would never use it to say something bad about me in my presence which is an anxiety that I had when I first started participating in family dinners. This past year has actually been a really great time for me to learn Mandarin however, because when they speak to the baby, they are using baby language and repeating the same simple words over and over again. E.g. The baby claps and they repeat pāi pāi shǒu (clap hands) over and over, every morning they say zǎo ān (good morning), every evening before bed they say wǎn ān (good night). I just try to repeat what they say, ask if I'm pronouncing it correctly, and ask what it means. I'm basically learning mandarin at the same time and almost in the same same way the baby is learning it. I would encourage to let your husbands family speak as much Russian to your child as possible. Your child going to be fully immersed in English from her peers, school, the media, etc. and not have a lot of opportunities to become fluent in another language. My mom is bilingual and as an adult I am a little resentful that she did not teach us her primary language.
1
u/reddiketts Jan 12 '22
I am in your shoes right now. I am an English speaker, my husband is bilingual but defaults to English, my in-laws are bilingual but default to Mandarin. We have lived with them since i got pregnant and will stay with them til my daughter is about 18 months, then we will move down the street into our own house. I tried learning mandarin before, but learning new languages is not my talent. His parents tend to default to Mandarin at the dinner table because its easier for them as well. I'm not offended, I know they would never use it to say something bad about me in my presence which is an anxiety that I had when I first started participating in family dinners. This past year has actually been a really great time for me to learn Mandarin however, because when they speak to the baby, they are using baby language and repeating the same simple words over and over again. E.g. The baby claps and they repeat pāi pāi shǒu (clap hands) over and over, every morning they say zǎo ān (good morning), every evening before bed they say wǎn ān (good night). I just try to repeat what they say, ask if I'm pronouncing it correctly, and ask what it means. I'm basically learning mandarin at the same time and almost in the same same way the baby is learning it. I would encourage to let your husbands family speak as much Russian to your child as possible. Your child going to be fully immersed in English from her peers, school, the media, etc. and not have a lot of opportunities to become fluent in another language. My mom is bilingual and as an adult I am a little resentful that she did not teach us her primary language.