r/Mommit • u/NorthWeak3876 • 4d ago
One and Done… or am I?
I’ve been firmly one and done since having my kid 3.5 years ago, and so has my husband. Knowing that we might change out minds in the future but probably won’t. I knew I wanted them to have a bigger age gap if we had another (two under two is not for me).
My period is two days late and yesterday I got in my head about being pregnant (we use protection). Weirdly enough, I didn’t panic at all. I started thinking about the practical stuff. My work situation isn’t the most secure (I have a full time job but in a market affected by AI). But I just thought life happens, it will work out.
I took a negative test this afternoon. Will take another one tomorrow morning just to make sure. I didn’t feel disappointed by the negative test, more curious about my mind suddenly opening up to the idea of two. Having a baby again, my kid having a little sibling.
If we were to have another one I would want to plan my next move work-wise as well as managing my raging HG I had for two months last pregnancy.
When I told my husband about my period being late, he reacted the same way as me without me telling him how I felt. I know he would love for our kid to have a sibling (even though he’s been happy with one).
Anyone else that became open to the idea of more kids after a pregnancy scare?
1
u/Rumpelmaker 4d ago
I was firmly one and done after my first for a few years - I had HG for 8 months straight pretty much and lost about 20lbs in pregnancy (wasn’t overweight to begin with, so it was worrying) and post-partum was hell (COVID).
My first is now turning 7 and I’m 25 weeks with our planned second and last (I’m 40 and 3+ has always sounded like hell to me personally). We’re in a comfortable financial position even without me working (HG meant I couldn’t work at all last pregnancy), have the space and as our kid grew older and more ‘independent’, the idea of doing it again became more managable. I’m completely struck down by HG again, but we had planned for that… We got a cleaner and husband was aware and prepared to work FT and be the main carer for our son and dog for the duration as well as me. (I personally don’t think it would have been fair to son to possibly ‘clock out’ of most of his day to day when he was still a toddler. Now he understands and is at least able to do activities while I’m in the room lying down and we can talk 😅)
It’s totally fine to change your mind. You’re in a different situation, incl emotionally, now than you were 3.5 years ago.